shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

THANKS, I GUESS? THERE'S NO ACCOUNTING FOR BAD TASTE

MY SPECIES IS TROLL. I'M NOT A FORMER? I DON'T KNOW IF MY FLESHY EXTERIOR WASN'T OBVIOUS ENOUGH OR WHATEVER, BUT I'M AN ORGANIC.

I GUESS WE'RE KIND OF LIKE ANTS? BIG, BIPEDAL ANTS

 

I mean, if there isn't any, I can make some. Just kind of surprised. Last time it was a, uh, coffee bar I think?

[He meanders over and starts making himself a cup of tea. It's not a very involved process.]

...Lot of new faces. Been a while.

 

<You're an ant?> [Hive is honestly very thrilled at this prospect.]

 

*grins*

Yeah.

*moves closer and puts his hand on jack's hip*

*he figures he could probably go further right now if he wanted and but now, this second, seems like a time for something subtle yet sexy*

*taking the journey to the d in a series of little steps*

*hopefully ending up there in less than a hour but not rushing the process*

*just getting it in motion right now*

*... not exactly foreplay, not exactly courting, but... a similar idea to both*

*he just doesn't recall or even care what the word for that concept is*

 

[these hugs. dave could die in an egbert hug. he leans back and looks at him]

hows it been dude i havent seen you here like EVER welcome to the fucking party you late bastard
makin us wait for your sorry ass
thats just fucking rude

 

"You missed the excitement," Alex says, laughing a little. "I'm Alex Pines. I'm probably one of them, because I don't know who you are."

 

I wondered if organics had bug types too. I'm sorry. -groomgroom those nonexistent mandibles- Haven't met any antformers before! -he ducks down a bit to get a better look at Karkat, antennae taptapping curiously-

 

[Jack looks at the hand on his him and cocks a brow, still smirking.]

Subtle, I like it.

 

*blushes*

But, ironically enough, not subtle about being subtle.

*church's hand moves downward, onto jack's ass*

 

Marcus. I think I've met a Pines in here before... Valiska, maybe? And a guy named Sev. I dunno, they were real nice though.

What sort of excitement are we talking here?

 

it must have been so boring without me! i'm sorry to make you suffer like that, dave.
speaking of, where are we?
[john looks around the rave and his face scrunches up. he recognizes nobody here. besides dave and karkat, of course!]

 

Somebody's handsy!

[Jack laughs, going to grab Church's other hand and put it on his ass as well.]

And don't worry about it, cupcake. Subtly is a well crafted art - it takes a while to get good at it. You just need more practice.

[He winks.]

 

Alex smiles. "Those are our counterparts in a different dimension. Valiska and Sev and Stanford are married to each other. We have a Stanford and a Lissa, who's the counterpart of Valiska--they have the same name, but different nicknames. But no Sev. That I know about anyway, I don't know all Aunt Lissa's lovers, only Grunkle Ford knows that. And her of course." She nods to the group. "That's my Aunt Lissa, that's my Grunkle Ford. My brother and his girlfriend are somewhere around here or maybe they woke back up. I think they call the other versions of me and my brother Dipper and Mabel, but they're a lot younger than us?"

 

*Squints* I'm Marcus.

 

*blushes*

*church lets jack move his hand*

*he then moves in closer to jack*

 

Alternate dimension counterparts, huh? I guess I've heard weirder. And, I mean, it's not like this is really a, uh, place I can judge in, huh? Did you change your name or is that another dimension thing?

...Hi? Nice to, um, meet you?

 

Yeah... Nice to meet you too, sorry man I've heard of evil alternates of me. Marcus Holloway, badass hacker.

 

That's gotta be weird. Marcus Hampton... Starbucks day-shift supervisor. Um. I'm not very good at computers, sorry. Is hacking cool?

 

You know, I think it's a good thing we met in here. If we'd met outside this bubble dimension - not the dome thing we're in right now, the whole thing - you'd probably be too scared of me to approach like this. It's honestly kind of a nice change in pace.

I mean, sure, I could still fuck you up if I wanted to - well, sort of. I could if not for the 'no harm' rule. Still. Then again, outside this place I'm still a holograph, so you'd have had to kiss Rhys for some hot Handsome Jack action.

Or we could find Tim, of course, but Rhys'd still have to be there. You know, with me living in his head and all. So it's good we didn't meet in the real world!

[Jack keeps rambling, though he keeps an attentive eye on Church's movements.]

 

Yeah, mostly... I work to right the wrongs Big Brother Blume has forced upon San Fran... I make it sound heroic but it's mostly me and my bros doing stupid shit. You have cTOS in your world?