shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

I would, but half the fun is in being obtuse on purpose. Gives me an air of mystery.

 

You need all the help you can get with that, so I'll let it slide, I guess.

 

[Dick playfully hipchecks Jason, laughing.]
You just bring out the worst in me, usually I'm a lot better at being cool and mysterious.

 

-shoves him lightly-
Uh-huh. That outfit you used to have with the open chest, that really screams cool and mysterious crime fighter. Oh wait, no, it screams "I care more about fashion than properly armoring myself".

 

Don't need any armor if you don't get hit. Plus any padding in the suit makes moving around harder.
[He is still laughing, lightly shoving back in retaliation.]

 

"...are you two related, dating...or both?"

 

Used to have the same job. Same adoptive father. I'm far better dating material than he is.

 

"Well you're certainly calmer," says Alex. "Was that a suggestion? Because dude, I don't recall ever seeing your face. And I don't have my aunt's smellovision."

 

... If that's a problem you will likely date neither of us unless Hood has seriously loosened up on the security. And no it wasn't a suggestion, I've got a kid to raise and a city to protect, not much time for flings. Or time to explain... most things really.

 

-playfight 2.0 is a go-

I'm just not pretty enough to date him, even if he does have that redhead kink.

 

Lies, unless you're hiding some really disfiguring shit I don't know about underneath there, you're still the cutest one of us. Rogueish, unkempt charms.
[The funny thing about being raised a vigilante is that you will just continue bantering while playfighting without even having to catch your breath.]

 

"So you don't do the millionaire playboy, captain of industry thing from the comics," Alex says, thinking.

"I was ragging on you just a little, but now I'm like wondering how you would ever make out in that mask...but mostly I was ragging on my very poly aunt for getting such a huge crush on a guy from looking into his LED emoji mask instead of his eyes. Because that honestly would be a problem for most people."

 

I don't think I was ever the cute one. If we're gonna do the boy band thing, I'm clearly the bad boy.
-you bond with people through mutual violence and snappy comebacks, right?-

Ugh. Eye contact is an interrogation technique, not a romantic gesture.

 

...
I...
I suddenly know how he felt when Tim did the smug "I know who you really are" thing.

Oh yes sorry I'm the sensitive dreamy one, I forgot.
[That's absolutely how you bond, how else would you bond?]

Also that, though I guess it can be something people look for in a performance.

 

"Yeah but kissing?"

 

Kissing's overrated. Handholding, THAT'S the steamy stuff right there.
^_^

 

.... can be an interrogation technique too.

 

[dave opens his mouth and then closes it again. universes here keep intersecting in the weirdest ways]

the who
my sister is a lalonde and sos my mom
theyre blonde as hell
man this is some fuckin freaky friday bodyswap except instead of body its universes bullshit
first one of the fords says they know jade and now this
but uh thanks
im actually kind of an asshole when i let out the unfiltered dave experience but i think not being a douche is important so i
make an effort

 

Alex shrugs. "Sorry, but that's what most people think about Batman in my world. You really aren't much like the stories, but then, why would you be?"

 

Unlike some people, I don't make time on the clock. You'll notice his mouth is free, though.
-manages to point at @Not The Batman You Want while still play fighting-

-in the world's driest deadpan-
Ooh, you tiger you. Next you'll be telling me you canoodle.

And that. That happens more than you'd think.