shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

Oh no, then I'd have to give you belly scritches too. How horrible. [He grins, then scratches a little more firmly on the underside of his jaw.]

I guess watching movies on the job isn't really up your alley, is it?

 

You taking him to crime scenes yet? Rodriguez movies are fake-looking, at least. Probably better than the real shit.

 

-he gives Jordi a small salute for the pun, whether he intended it or not-

 

i cant believe were having a fight about this shit
i cant believe karkat im still bitter i didnt get to die saving someone vantas is giving me a lecture over something that is inarguably less harmful than that
fucking

[dave pauses. there isn't much going on visibly because he's put his expressions in a box for now, but he's calming himself down]

what do you want me to do karkat
because tell you what when i got up on that day i didnt think i was gonna make it to 20 much less end up fucking immortal
i cant just magically be cool with it man
im cool with a lot of stuff but no one else seems to get that this is some heavy shit

but then id come back and have to face punishments for my theoretical misdeeds

 

I mean we put movies on while we do a lot of our research when we get in busy times. I also use to listen to books on tape when I was running around--

*Then the purrs kick up and make his voice go all weird:* San Fran. Oh... *Huffs a little and gives Jordi a look but doesn't tell him to stop*

 

.... Pass i think.

Distractions are no good when dealing with meta-crimes. All kinds of terrible things that can go wrong then.

Maybe not anymore considering how he behaved around the last corpse. Commissioner Gordon almost flipped his shit.

Oh no while researching I've got audio track of research running as well as four feeds of visuals. And I still need to exchange opinions with Robin while I'm reviewing intel. So no, we barely manage a movie night when we schedule it for the whole family.

 

[He winks and points back. He absolutely did not intend that pun, but he'll take credit for it.]

Might be able to get it bumped down to 'attempted murder' or just plain assault and battery, then. Of course, this really brings up the question of whether or not you'll press charges, huh.

[He scratches harder. Yes, he thinks this is hilarious, no he's not going to stop any time soon. Pls, continue with ur discussion, Marcus.]

 

Yeeeah we sometimes did that kind of--

*And with a physical and audible pop he's a cat, a purring wiggling cat that is willing to do absolutely anything to keep this going. Damn it Jordi.*

 

-is the giant robot pouting? the giant robot is pouting-

 

Yeah that transforming cat thing will never not be weird I think.

I'm sure you can find someone else who can give you a corpse to practice on?

 

They wouldn't let me into medbay to look at the corpse they had on the ship. They said it was morbid and I think disrespectful? I wouldn't have taken him apart unless they said I could I just wanted to look.

 

[Maximum belly rubs: activate.]

You get used to it when it's a daily thing. Not so much when it's incidental.

 

Most people tend to be kind of touchy about that.
[Boy does he remember the scene with Damian still. Ugh.]
I'd recommend maybe getting a research position that might allow you access to dead bodies regularly? Like... anatomist or something like that.

Oh surely. There's a lot of things that we in Gotham just accept as regular occurences that would likely give people pause usually too. You get used to the weirdest things.

 

It's an immaterial space, anyone who knows what a corpse is can bring one. Without actually killing anyone, even! Like so--

[Vector summons a particularly nondescript Cybertronian frame, greyed-out and apparently long-dead of no particular cause. Anyone who doesn't want to see corpses will instead see a rather boring car.]

 

Sounds like a story.

You got a medical text somewhere you can get ahold of? Most of the time that's got corpses to look at.

 

[There goes the eyebrow raise again.]
Huh.

 

A corpse dressed like an angel fell down in front of a bunch of socialites, including Bruce Wayne's ward. Robin decided the appropriate descriptor for him was "potato face" and when Gordon started yelling at him he corrected to "Mister Potato Face."

 

-he develops a slightly wild, alarmed look- I have to work with FF. FF works in the fuel dispensary.

-instantly brightens and goes to crouch over the body, poking round at it-

Spoiler: mildly gross maybe?

-transforms his hands into a pair of metal-cutting tools and sets about separating the corpse from most of its intact plating

I don't think the medics will give me texts after I wanted to see the corpse. They were angry.

 

It's a common feature of immaterial planes-- "where there's a will there's a way," made particularly noticeable by how responsive this one is. So long as nothing is actively resisting you, you can do as you please. Resistance takes many forms; physical matter doesn't much like becoming nonphysical, so you can't summon someone or -thing from the waking world without some difficulty, and of course if another dreamer is willing something not to happen things get messy... [Vector. Vector stop lecturing, no one signed up for your class.]

 

[Ah yes, codependency, a flavor he knows far too well]
I take it there's no research positions that'd allow you two to be physically close but cater to oth of your needs then?

[Mild frown. Well if this is a villainous trap this will be easily revealed if it doesn't work. Still worth a try. He concentrates hard. A Philly Cheesesteak appears floating before him.]
... neat.
[He doesn't, however immediately start eating because it may still be a trap, or something that the villains anticipated. Instead he pulls an analysis tool from his utility belt to test the food for various drugs and poisons.]