shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

"Gravity Falls is our home," says Lissa. "And at the moment we have enough to do keeping the President and the Condesce from destroying the planet it's on, which still, by the way, is where all of the humans in that particular dimension live, because they don't have much in the way of space travel." She glances at Angeth. "At least not yet."

 

Sometimes. Do you fly?
[He returns the grin, a lot more the smooth sweettalker smile than the smug "I'm the fun batman whose plan worked, see robin?" smile he wears to work.]

 

"Well no, but they also didn't show up right in the middle of the shitshow, did they? They had other family there and they had time to plan." Stan shrugs. "This scenario sounds a whole lot more like the last plane outta Saigon."

 

Yeah, well- well-

... yeah, but Pennarion never should've became Saigon in the first place.

 

"Prob'b'ly not," Stan agrees. "But preventing that wasn't their job. They never had a real home there. They'd already decided to come home by then, they just didn't know how to get back."

 

Do you treat identical twins as interchangeable too, then? They might have the same.... core to them, the same starting point, but they've grown up differently, if nothing else.

 

Lissa looks at Norm, frowning. "I've met Valiska Pines here. If you can't tell us apart, you need better glasses. She's thinner than me, probably because half her body mass went into her hair, and she doesn't dress like me. And she doesn't act like me. Probably because she didn't spend her entire life from birth to the end of her apprenticeship at the goddamn Beijada Station!"

 

And Russia should've won the Cold War, yeah sure whatever. If wishes were fishes... something about fishermen here, but I'm pretty sure it'd just end up that everyone was fucking smelly or whatever.

[He's back, looking rather mussed up and smug. Also apparently unaware that he's talking to a literal genie? Good job, Jordi.]

 

*Guess who else is back, lounged over Jordi with his chin on Jordi's shoulder. He's purring, just sort of lounging there wrapped in pajamas.*

 

No.

... I guess I'm just... just really fucking upset...

And wishing would do no good here, anyway, since this is a dreamspace and I can't do shit about anything in the real world in a fucking dreamspace! I won't even remember this when I wake up, even!

 

So... why are you upset about it then? Just let it roll off. If no one's paying you, there's no reason to give a shit, right?

[Hey is there brandy behind this bar counter? There is. He pours himself a drink.]

 

[Gently:] Not every discussion has to end in doing something, and I don't think that's what the Singularity over there was getting at in any case. It's alright to be upset-- pits, I'd be worried if you weren't, dystopias are by definition rather awful! I'm just an old meddler, me, and I think I have a bit more experience keeping dimensional iterations of the 'same' being separate than most people here.

 

*flat stare*

Do you actually think I was ever paid to care about anything?

*people. actually giving him money. to do things. that's a laugh.*

Oh. Well. Yeah. That makes sense.

 

Lissa grins at him. "Still mad at me for giving him that stuff?"

 

If you're not getting paid, then don't give a shit. Easy as that.

[Siiiiiiiiiip. Also tugging Marcus a little closer, because he's comfortable like this. His barstool has little armrests now to keep them from falling off.]

I certainly hope not. Not with how loud he was yelling about it.

 

"Has it occurred to you that probably none of your friends on Pennarion live there either in our universe, given that my counterpart finally built a Nest of his own out of immigrants?" Ford asks softly. "The world by that name in the universe where I met Lissa is not your home, no more so than it is ours. I'm very sorry Kadiris Fontaine and Ral Hargraeven died. I've heard nothing but good things about Kadiris Fontaine, and I did love Ral once, despite his constant facility at irritating me. But...look. We don't know Sunshine. We don't have a third partner named Severin. The kids who live with your Ford live with us. The people you care about on Pennarion, at least the ones you've met so far, in our world, are fine. The people you haven't met are not your friends. And you probably know that while the voting public on Pennarion was badly manipulated, and that's not entirely their fault, they could have chosen to support Kadiris Fontaine and Ral Hargraeven. If they didn't do it because Kadiris Fontaine was terrible at being a woman and shouldn't ever have been required to pretend to be one, or because Kadiris Fontaine loved or at least trusted someone of another species, someone who cared about the place enough to turn his back on his entire society, maybe they're not entirely innocent themselves."

 

Not mad, being mad at you is a hard sell. I think I got more out of it than he did though, so that's cool. *The man has limp limbs now. He's just happily draped. His words contain a touch of purr*

Hey. Fucker. *Doesn't do anything about this. Considers biting but, eh, work.*

 

-he's still wearing the cowl that leaves his mouth free instead of the helmet-
There's a universe where the guy who killed me is the hero. Ran into his kid once. That was weird.

 

What, gonna cry about it?

[Jordi offers him the glass of brandy.]

Don't you hate it when that happens?

 

Not everyone can do that. Brains tick differently and all.

[Grandpa Space Robot nods, still apparently more focused on his knitting than the conversation.] You'll get there. Or not! I'm no Onyx, but seems to me you've got a good long time to learn, if you'd like.