shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

"...so the person who wants you all dead was the first of your kind?" Lissa takes a deep breath. Then she downs the rest of her glass in one gulp. It's not like that sounds familiar or anything.

"Why?"

 

*Just sort of snuggles into him. His person. Happens to shift his face to where he's purring directly into Jordi's ear though, good luck with that.*

 

*reappears* My apologizes, I acted without thinking. I shall not do it again. I was merely curious. Please forgive me.

 

Hey, the only person still alive for that stuff was Queen Laima, and it's kind of a touchy subject. I gave all the details I knew.

Maybe the humans forced him into it! Who knows!

 

Ford makes a face. First he learns that Lissa's been a witness to G-d knows what kind of child abuse and never told him about it, now she's triggered by this new alien's racial history. He puts his thumbs squarely back into those spots behind her ears and makes a funny rumbling noise that's as close as he gets to purring.

"It's kind of a touchy subject for her, too."

 

It's not her story.

 

"No. There's a very similar one."

 

[karkat looks over to where dave is doing his thing and makes a face before going back to the book. after a few paragraphs he turns back to unspoken]

BUT HOW DOES ANYONE DO ANYTHING IF NOTHING NEEDS DONE??? HOW DO YOU JUST, DO WHATEVER? THERE'S NOTHING TO FIX AND NOTHING TO INEVITABLY FUCK UP AND JUST. WHAT THE SHIT.

 

[Vector laughs.] Fair enough!

 

[He rolls his eyes, waving her off.]
Don't approach people from behind without warning. You never know who's trained to counterattack first and ask questions second.

 

[Well, he's half-deaf now. Jordi makes a face, but keeps petting.] You're killing me, smalls.

That's when you embellish. It's fine, give it a few years and we'll make a storyteller of you yet.

 

-he starts laughing-
How about no. A two week surveillance detail and investigation of known associates is the minimum.

What they said. I'm not that stupid.

 

*Trilling purr before lowering his face back to Jordi's neck, he's totally kissing his neck too. This is a very happy cat.*

 

Thank you. [Petpetpet. He doesn't bother to go through the motions of actually pouring himself something to drink this time either, he just manifests a glass of whiskey and sips at it.]

 

I see, I should have thrown in a sword fight, a gun fight, and a car chase.

 

I'll check it out. My Korean's garbage, might help me to practice it some.

 

Nah, throw in some love triangles. The people fucking love love triangles.

[He points with the hand that isn't petting Marcus and lifts his glass in a salute.] It's a growing market, worth getting into. Really making a push for the global scale.

 

I don't think the First Moms and Dads really did love triangles, if you know what I mean.

 

Mmmrh. *He'd be cuter if he were in cat shape, but that would require moving. So, instead, he rather happily falls into doing things with his mouth to Jordi's neck and occasionally purr-whispering something or another.*

 

Lissa groans. "I'm fine, Ford. I'm fine." She has been doing the liquid catte thing where she slumps back against him and slowly, glacially even, begins to settle downward, but now she sits up straight, though she notably doesn't shake his hands off her ears. "The mother of our species is believed to have Regrets."

"Jordi, you're being an ass," Lissa says, rolling her eyes.

"Yeah, don't," says Lissa. "Ford can put his hands on me from behind because I know his scent like my own. Same with the rest of my family. I might hurt a stranger. I might hurt them kind of a lot."

At this point she bursts out laughing, she just can't help herself. "Very appropriate response," she says, and grins at Naft. "Don't listen to him. Unless he's telling you to get the fuck down and take cover or something like that, then pay close attention."