shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

Huh? Oh, I actually broke out like three days after they gave up on me and found you. Then screamed at you and took up residence in your house until I changed back. Because I was going to get you to fix it for me. You went and got yourself turned into a cat there too, but at least that time you didn't end up in a sack.

[Little scritches on the back of Marcus's head.]

 

I... see... Well, that must've meant I was trying to fix it or something? Seems like my luck, and if other me didn't end up in a sack good for him. *Shivers before leaning back into Jordi's hand* Good to know there's another me that you also like, perhaps it's not just my beautifully clipped ear.

 

Mi?
-a mi has appeared. It is wet and not happy about it-

 

"Aw," Lissa says, "I love meezers. Seal point? Chocolate point?"

Lissa grins, then sighs; she is worried about him. Sometimes people like him are able to give in and let go and claim it as part of being the kind of man that they are but not always.

Spoiler: nsfw

"Just make sure the textures or protrusions on whatever you use are the right shape and made of some kind of lifelike-feeling material, not something that will actually harm you. Humans are a lot more adventurous than they give themselves credit for, and sometimes their imaginations get the better of them in dangerous ways. I hope, if it happens to you, that you're able to enjoy it as much as I do. And also I think you have a partner who is really very sensitive to things that bother you, so you should be okay. Remember, being a cat in heat does not make you anything else that you know you are not."

 

Trust me when I say this, he will not give me rest on the best of days. Dude never stops, he seriously just keeps going. He can't be human. Energizer bunny plus dildo, like I said.

 

I mean, I like him alright, but you're my favorite. I'd throw him under a fucking bus for you. [More scritches.]

Chocolate. Like I said, I was fucking gorgeous, but I'd rather be a Maine Coon. Those fuckers are huge.

 

*Purrs a bit, clearly glad about this fact* Uh-huh, bet you had fun both as cats though.

 

Lissa frowns. "You know how that sounds, right? But, you're happy, so I don't think you mean it that way?"

 

Oh uh, I don't mean it in a bad way. I am more than happy. It's sort of uh, taking the piss out of him I guess?

 

Ford raises an eyebrow. "You're not the chocolate point that beats up half the cats in our neighbourhood, though." He's grinning. "Or are you?"

 

Lissa relaxes. "Okay good. I like him a lot in a friendly way and I really didn't think he'd ever hurt you. But I haven't known him as long as you, and I don't let anyone hurt my friends."

 

Yeah, but you're way more fun. And I wasn't a Maine Coon.

Well, I've never met you before and also never broken into your house to use your shower, so no, probably not. Keep an eye on that guy though. He's going places. Might be testing your locks as we speak.

 

Nah, he wouldn't hurt me. I can get away with so much that other people can't cause I'm his cat, there's the other reason that starts with an 'L' but I'm not saying it right now unless he does.

That's a sticking point for you, isn't it?

 

[He bites Marcus's good ear. How dare.]

I was robbed.

 

Hey! *squirms and lifts a hand to attack Jordi's hair*

 

Ford laughs. "He doesn't have to break in. My wife lets him in through the kitchen window. I think he might be sweet on her. But I told him she'll never love him as much as she loves me, so he better behave."

 

You're gonna regret that. [It's on now. Jordi deploys The Tickles, because he fights dirty.]

Check your valuables anyways. He's probably clever.

 

*Squirms and tries to bend away without losing his spot, this is clearly not going to work though.* H-HEY! *He is now attacking the hands. He is getting amped up and attacking Jordi's hands in human shape.*

 

"Oh, I do." Ford grins. "I like that cat. Our operation can use guys like him." He takes a deep breath. "You met the wolf? Marcus has met the wolf, before they split off."

 

Lissa pulls a towel out of her pocket and holds her hands out to the wet mi. "Want to get dry and have some fish? Cousin Marcus made us plenty."

"Yeah, he met Missha. Missha and Omega both growled at him."