shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

-he lets the big dog be friendly at him but doesn't pay much attention to him until he sneezes-
Not a fan of gunpowder and grave dirt, buddy?

-offers his bare hands for sniffing-
You mind being pet?

 

*Dis someone say pet? Pat? Pet? Dogmeat searches for the person who said that and finds him. Dogmeat bounds over bumping into @Red Hood leg and trying to get his attention. He needs this pet*

 

-Badulf somehow manages to bark with a questionmark without it sounding hostile. He moves in to get another big sniff and backs up, looking Jason dead in the eyes as he puts his paw on his nose and wears a distinctly human expression of "what the actual fuck"-

 

-laughs and offers his other hand for smelling before starting to pet Dogmeat-
Whoa, buddy, I got two hands, it's okay.

 

"We're both that old," Ford says. "Clean living. Always know where your intoxicants come from and never sleep with anyone who lies about their sex life."

 

-well, this dog is clearly either an alien or a magic user and probably not just a dog. Way too smart.-
What, I smell extra weird on top of that? Must be something just you can smell, cause these guys don't seem to mind.

 

-Badulf sneezes again. Then moves in in attempts to get pets, since Jason seems to be handing them out. His tail is attempting liftoff as a message of "it's ok if you smell weird I forgive you"-

 

-sniff sniffs- Pirr! -pounces on the hand instead. is playtime!-

 

*sniffs it. It smells clean. Starts to lick the hand and rubs his head against it wanting Jason to scratch his chin*

 

-dilemma! Three animals two hands. He wiggles one hand at the mi to engage it in play before scratching Dogmeat with the other. Then he starts to pet Badulf. The two dogs seem smart enough to understand taking turns, at least he hopes they are. His helmet seems to give an impression of a smile.-
Don't I feel special with all this attention.

 

-Badulf does in fact understand turns, though he sometimes playfully swipes at Dogmeat when he moves in, because he's off duty that means life is for Play. Also sniff that mi, they smell funny too-

 

-that hand is so dead. So very dead-

Mi! -sniff back. Mis smell of rave, and cat, and a little bit of void-

 

Of course! A whole cluster of 'mirrored' universes, good gone bad and bad gone good, that sort of thing. A good half of our work is keeping them from breaking everything. Not my turn for that duty, thankfully!

 

Being able to see them means there's no doubt one of you up to his elbows in second-hand energon, looking at an even worse version going "Well shit, I'm one of the good ones?"

-yes, there is a universe out there with an even worse Unspoken. Possibly one with the Void wearing her skin-

 

"I may resemble that remark." Ford sighs. "There's one of me that's...a monster, really." He scowls. "And the bastard likes to dress like me."

 

I don't think a Worst Outcome version of us has appeared here yet. And we get bad without alternate universe antics! -she giggles cheerfully-

 

"Of course you do," says Ford, with an elegant, if rather affected, flourish. "Good to see you again."

 

*norm gives ford a Look*

*did he just...? he did not just...? did he?*

 

Ford looks over at Norm, wondering what the fresh hell that's about.

"Are you quite all right?"

 

Are you quite all right?

'Cause, if I heard you right, you just said the Ford from my Pennarion, you know the one, was a monster.