shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

Of course I could!

 

Ford's been a little nervous since they bubbled themselves, but when he sees the two cats curled up sleeping together, he grins. "Jordi, are you seeing this? It's adorable--"

And, pop, there he goes.

Well, that's okay. Ford picks up the Lissy-cat (who opens one eye and then lets him) and cuddles her up against his chest. "Well. She's never done that before. But she's purring, and it seems like the happy kind..."

He beams at her, and carefully strokes the spot just between her ears.

 

Really! Without using even a little bit of dream magic, even? [Vector's grin is 100% a challenge.]

 

-No backing down now!- Yes. -conjures up some needles and wire-

 

[Vector presents a pattern, but declines to explain it further. You're on your own, bro.]

 

-glares at the pattern as if it had personally offended him. He will not be beaten by a bundle of knots. He begins knitting.-
See, this isn´t so hard- Frag!

 

*A very pretty young person whose gender is practically impossible to determine on visual information alone watches the knitting robot with an expression of politely veiled amusement.*

 

-glared- What are you looking at tiny?

 

*A quick smile, like a knife flashing* Nothing, sir, I just like to watch things take shape. I can turn my back if you would like.

 

-silent glare. he is aking A Lot of mistakes, but he keeps trying for a while with a murderous expression and intense concentration-
How in the world does this help you with anything Vek, this manages to be both boring and absolutely infuriating.

 

*The person tilts their head, squinting up at the tangle in the robot's hands.*
Are you using metal wire for that?

 

-looks up again, glares- Yes, what of it?

 

I've only ever seen such things done with yarn. I don't believe someone with human strength could manage to knit with wire. *Their tone is a bit on the placating side*

 

Probably not. Whereas I would undoubtedly shred yarn if I attempted to use it.
-gives his failed knitting a vicious glare, then tosses it in the air and blasts it with a bolt of purple light from his cannon-

 

*Their eyes follow the cannon with obvious interest, and one hand suddenly has three long metal needles, not unlike the knitting needles but wickedly sharp, clasped between the fingers. For now, that hand is still hanging loosely at their hip.

They smile pleasantly so as not to make it obvious they're sizing the robot up.*

I didn't catch your name, sir.

 

I am the Fallen.

 

*They bow but their eyes stay on that cannon*

And I am Haku.

 

Remember that bit about needing to fail sometimes? And besides, cr--

--well! I almost wish we'd put a bet on that, now, but would you stop frightening the organics? I realize how important posturing is to you, but I seriously doubt they care how well you did or didn't do with the frog.

 

Well met. -nods to them-

Fine, you win. -flops on him- What? No I just needed to shoot something, it might as well be that insult to all that is good in the universe. It´s worse than watching paint dry, paint is at least restful.

 

I'm not frightened *says Haku primly. They decide not to say it was impossible to tell that the wire thing was meant to be a frog.*