shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

The few times there was yelling, I was the one getting yelled at, and I deserved it, anyway, so I suppose I haven't learned.

 

Technically I can drink whatever in here, but coffee's good.

 

"I couldn't tolerate coffee when I was pregnant with Jezebel, but maybe you'll do better. The smell...poor Ford." Lissa laughs, and then sighs.

 

I've yet to have the whole 'morning sickness' thing. We only noticed really because my tailored suit-pants wouldn't fit right... There were tears, angry tears because we were going to go out and then nope. Then I got mad that I was so upset about it.

*Sighs.*

 

-Mirrors doesn't exactly let himself be pinned, but it's pretty clear that he's used to ending up on the bottom of the pile in playfights and almost looks forward to it. He's laughing as well, a deep rumble of uncomplicated happiness-

 

Lissa ruffles his hair.

"Hate to tell you this, but it's definitely been more than a month since we saw each other if your pants already don't fit. You didn't get much of a season I guess? Or you just didn't think it would take?"

 

Well, I'd already kind of experienced that before ending up in here? So... Dunno, guess I just didn't notice? Or something? I just thought it was a particularly good week. *Shrug*

 

Lissa snorts. "You got SCREWED, sweetie. Four kits and ... pfft, I refuse to believe anyone's that good you can't tell the diff..." Her eyes widen. "He got you on the very first try! O-em-gee, that witch was a bitch! Also, that must have... ow."

 

Yeah... I mean, without the whole uh-- Like I said, Jordi does not stop. The man is an endless fountain of uh... It just-- Yeah. *Snort laughs and then sighs* Curses are stupid.

 

-Jason tries not to tense right back up because that doesn't sound great, not with everything else he's heard, but if the kid doesn't want to leave, he won't. He breathes out and deliberately gets rid of any tension-
Not just yelling - any bad stuff, really. If you're happy with things, though, then don't change 'em.

-Jason stops even pretending to try any more and rolls partially off Mirrors, although he's still laying down partially on one arm. He's smiling.-
So far you really know how to have a good time.

 

-Mirrors waggles his eyebrows. As stated before, they are large and red and ideal for waggling- Ov cawse. Hy know ozzer vays to haff fon, too. -he's already got an arm draped in a friendly manner over Jason's middle, but now the hand on the end of it sneaks down to pat Jason's butt-

 

-considers for a moment, looking at Mirrors' face to make sure he's serious-
Okay. But the mask stays on.

 

Hyu do voteffer hyu vont, mine friend! Iz hard mit de tusks end de kissink, ennyvay. -he winks his good eye, and the fade to black begins to take shape as the hand already on Jason's butt sets about getting more familiar-

 

Lissa breaks into a series of wholly undignified guffaws before sliding down into the chair next to him (liquicatte win). "You have to know, I'm picturing a thing that Mason did with Diet Coke and Mentos once. Except...not."

 

Oh gosh no, mind you my pants are pretty closely tailored so sometimes even before I'd have a time of getting them on.

 

Lissa tilts her head to one side. "Okay, Marcus, that's even crazier than what I was picturing. You have got to be shitting me now. This is starting to sound like something from the weird part of DeviantArt."

 

UH I think I'm talking-- Lemme...

Spoiler: Sexy mention I suppose?

I went into season like two months before I ended up here? I just didn't realize what that was and never really connected it? Even then, why would I be fertile? I was born unable to have kids according to my doctors before. Like, uh, and Jordi is just Jordi. The fewest times we end up gettin' it on in like... a session... is four? He just-- He's very hypersexual. Very.

But uh, so that'd make me about three months? I just... didn't notice because we usually just hang around and I guess I assumed I was getting a little fat? I also didn't get like any of the food aversion stuff so far, or morning sickness, just a little achy and weepy. It's not showing much, just enough to make my tight ass pants cry I guess.

 

"Oh," says Lissa. "You were talking about Jordi as a fountain and my brain went to the Diet Coke thing Mason did that one time, then you were saying you had trouble getting your pants on even before you were pregnant, or so I thought. That made me think of some weird shit I saw in Alex's internet history once by accident, and...now I kinda need brain bleach?" She laughs.

"Anyhow. Yeah, it's kinda normal to go into season shortly after you bond with someone you're really compatible with, unless you're in some kind of danger. At least for my people it is. I know you're not one of my people...but you kinda sorta seem like you are? At first you would've felt just really cuddly and maybe a little ditzy. It's not like the kinda brain fog you get from being in pain, you just have a different sense of what things are important. Then you just want to be touched all the time and you don't want anyone but your mates near you, and you don't want anyone else near your mates, and..." She shrugs.

 

*Laughs a little* Yeah, it was basically a uh... It was me basically climbing all over him because I wanted nothing to do with anything but him. I think he enjoyed it, mostly because we got a lot of extra curricular activity in I think.

 

Lissa cracks up. "Yeah, that sounds familiar!"