shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

No! Primus, no, there are very few universes that are pure evil-- I'd say 'none' but everything's possible somewhere even if the Transformers multiverse hasn't spawned one yet. The Sigma cluster are... hm, easiest to call them "mirrored" universes with reference to the one that spawned my home universe. Alignments switch, the defenders become the aggressors, peaceful Decepticons attacked by sadistic Autobots, all that. My particular skillset-- altering and moving between universes by understanding what makes them tick-- is just particularly troublesome when my innate proclivity to protect and heal the multiverse becomes one to help bring about its destruction. Just like a doctor also knows what's most painful or harmful, if that makes sense?

 

"We have skillsets in common. But I can do things she can't, and vice versa." Lissa runs a hand through her hair. "She's a university professor, and I have a GED and some community college credits. We're both magicians, but she had a lot more formal training in that, as well. But I trained ten years longer than she did at the Station, which is both a bad thing and a good thing."

 

"Mostly bad," says Ford -- where did he come from? "--but it sure is something when you appear to come out of a wall." He puts one hand on her shoulder, then picks her up when he has her attention and is sure she will let him. "Are you all right?"

 

Lissa shrugs and laughs softly. "Marcus is pregnant. Four kits. I'm happy for him, and for Valiska too--"

 

Ford almost blurts out a question with an incredibly obvious answer, which is how the fuck did THAT happen, and then sighs and kisses her forehead. "Is Marcus...happy about it?" he asks gently. "I think we should warn your sister, or at least find out if she already knows. If there's no genetic incompatibility between them, maybe that hot shit boyfriend they've got that we never see can fix it, but I don't want you working your hopes up, okay?"

 

"Marcus is happy." Lissa smiles, then sighs. "That's a good idea. But I'm not going to let myself think about that until somebody actually tells me it's going to be fixed."

 

"Good plan." Ford hugs her. Then he waves to Vector Prime.

"Pure evil," Ford says, and feels the words on his tongue like cool marbles. "To define any universe as pure evil would require a certain knowledge of what evil is, other than cruelty for its own sake, or malignant selfishness...and the multiverse as a whole is inhospitable to purity of any kind. Quantum physics tells us that even being aware of a thing, let alone observing it, affects that thing in any of a number of ways. We're all entangled, and as a result, hardly anything is pure. Actual purity isn't a thing most people would want in their lives."

He shrugs. "There are universes that are very similar to each other, but, as Vector says, binary conflicts and groups get all switched around. That's because the multiverse isn't particularly fond of binaries, either. And also, if you imagine the multiverse as a series of trees growing out of each other, at the centre of which is the Unbound and Unnameable Source, they grow on all sides, and each branch has corresponding similar branches, lateral and contralateral in every direction. It's easy to define a mirror universe as evil because your counterpart has taken the opposite path from you, but..."

Suddenly, he scowls. "Oh, fuck. Just fuck that guy."

 

"We've been over this. He doesn't want to," Lissa says, and pats Ford's cheek. "Weren't you originally going to say something along the lines of 'your counterpart has different perspectives and different experiences'? Because that's what you usually say when you get to that part."

 

Ford's face is red. "You know, I could say 'fuck you too', but you'd just take it as an invitation." He grins, reluctantly.

 

Lissa nods, looking rather pleased with herself. "You're going to have to apologise to each other eventually. Might as well suck it up the next time we run into him." She kisses the tip of Ford's nose.

 

"Him first," Ford mutters under his breath, but he kisses her.

 

*Hey he must have woken up at some point because he's back and he's now wearing an over-sized hoodie that looks like this and is intently playing a game on his phone. Despite being in a dreamscape someone looks pretty tired.*

 

"I hear congratulations are in order." Ford smiles as he sits down with Lissa, whom he's still carrying.

 

*glances up and smiles* Yeah, I'm still getting use to thinking about it as real.

 

"It will be real enough when you've got four of them to feed at 3 AM," Ford says with amusement. "Does Jordi realise how much sleep he is not going to get?"

 

[He pops in, very harried looking, long enough to deliver a message.]

Believe me, I know.

[And then he's gone again. Apparently someone else woke him up. Possibly several of them.]

 

I was gonna say he probably has an idea but...

 

Ford cracks up. "That was priceless."

 

Yeah I have no idea what it was about but...

 

"Living with Jordi probably necessitates a fair amount of flexibility even without four kits." Ford shrugs. "Of course, so does living with Lissa. Or Stan. And I live with both of them."