"Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy" - The Misheard Lyrics Thread!

So, I just found out this afternoon it's "Bitch, Don't Kill My Vibe" not "Please Don't Kill My Vibe"

...

Kinda changes the song, doesn't it?

 

Double misheard lyrics, one I knew and one I was unsure about until I looked it up just now.

Marcy Playground - Sex and Candy

I smell sex and
Candy here

Misheard as: I smell sex in Candyland.

Listen, he said he's had too much caffeine and he's downtown, and some cafes have like... boardgames and stuff. I was like 8 when this song came out, I knew adults could be weird about sex, maybe Candyland was a metaphor? //shrugs

Also:

Who's that casting
Devious stares
In my direction

I always thought he was maybe saying "defeated", but couldn't quite tell. Defeated like, "yeah I guess you'll do", but devious makes more sense.

 

Again with Counting Stars-apparently it's "I could've lied, couldn't I, couldn't I" instead of "I couldn't lie, couldn't lie, couldn't lie".
I like my version better.

 

Damn, I thought the same thing

 

Perhaps the lyrics site I looked the lyrics up on was wrong?

 

Check another site?

 

from mr sandman, i always thought it was "please turn on your magic bean" instead of "magic beam"

 

Spoiler: nsfw text

I've always sort of figured that the lyrics to Vesuvius by Sufjan Stevens aren't really "follow me now as I finger the ghost", but that's the only thing i can hear

 

Drop It Like It’s Hot:

Original: I roll the best weed cause I got it going on

Mistake: I roll my own jeans cause I got it going on

 

0:42
Did it frighten you
How we kissed when we danced on the light of floor?
On the light of floor

it's so little but she says it with so much weight that it kills me silly every time to mishear it

 

There's a line in When The Lights Come On by TMBG that's like...I could never make out what Linnell was saying in the second part, but I always heard it as "but we'll be laughing and chitting when we're (incomprehensible)," and I assumed it was like...happy chatter or something, idk?

Apparently the actual line is "but we'll be laughing and shit, it will have been worth it." Only learned this when I looked it up on the wiki, and upon learning that I've been able to hear it.

(I think maybe part of what threw me off is that they rarely swear in their songs (at least not the ones on studio albums)--they'll drop a "damn" here and there, and very occasionally a "bitch" or "bastard," but "shit" is easily the heaviest swear they've ever used in a studio song so I guess I wasn't expecting it?)

 

When I first heard "video killed the radio star" I thought the line was video Gil, the radio star and was about a famous radio talk show host named Gilbert that I had somehow never heard of

 

i mondegreen'd four lines from the yawning grave and three of them are better than the original ("told you not to get lost in the wild" became "told you not to get close to the wild," "oh you fool there are rules" became "though you fooled every rule," "you have opened the yawning grave" became "you belong in the yawning grave.") i misheard "you can run but you can't escape," and the original line was "you can run but you can't be saved," and that is admittedly way neater.

 

I thought for years that the line in Lovely Bunch of Coconuts was "Take one small one, balance it on your head".

 

Why Am I The One by Fun keeps popping up in my youtube mix, and every time I've been hearing:

"So I ask if she remembers when
She used to call me Visi-man,
We were fools to think that nothing could go wrong."

After the nth time wondering who the hell Visi-Man is, a read of the lyrics revealed.....She used to come and visit me.

 

West End Girls by the Pet Shop Boys keeps playing on our work radio. All my life I’ve only ever been able to hear:

In the west end town of Denimworld,
There’s east end boys and west end girls

“in a west end town, a dead end world” is apparently what it actually says! I prefer my one. I like the mental image of Denimworld. XD

 

apparently the Score's "born for this" says something like "we are the warriors who learnt to love the pain" but i heard it as "we are the warriors who learnt to love again" and i prefer that honestly

 

Misheard lyrics in Chinese!

 

While I was working my last few months in retail, a song was added to the in-store radio which includes in its chorus (and title) "it's been a long road, but I'm not there yet".
I consistently heard it, up until I quit and had to look it up for being stuck in my head, as "not dead yet". which imo is better, but perhaps not as grocery-store-friendly.