I used to watch a lot of forums, but this is my first time posting in one.

Mostly, it is just if you use them too often. It also can depend on the ingredients - some of them have salicylic acid, which can irritate and overdry the skin if used too much. There's also a difference between a physical and a chemical exfoliant - physical is something like an apricot scrub, where there's actually grit in the scrub to clear off your skin, and chemical is just what it sounds like. Chemical tends to be harsher on the skin. It is necessary for almost everyone to use an exfoliant, though, especially if you have breakouts - it scrubs off the dead skin before it can get into the pores and block them up.

 

The other important thing about facial scrubs - get one with a natural scrubbing agent (walnut shell, apricot pits, corn cob bits are all good stuff) rather than the plastic beads. The plastic beads suck and do not work.

 

I do have product recommendations if you're interested, as well. (Sorry for constant replying, I keep forgetting to say things!) In general, exfoliants that use rice bran are the gentlest.

 

i am always up for product recommendations! i get overwhelmed by choice sometimes and usually have the impression that if i'd known more i could have made a better choice.

 

Tatcha Polished Rice Enzyme Powder - this isn't exactly what I use (I'm not rec'ing that because not a lot of places carry it and it's ridiculously expensive, I only use it because I get it for wholesale price from work) but it's very close, and works well. It's a good gentle exfoliant to start off with, and if you do well with once or twice a week, it can be upped because it's technically meant to be used every day. Origin's Modern Friction is also good.

 

Any recs for similar problems, but can't handle Wet Things on Face because of autism sensory issues?

(Specifically, it's mild blackheads ("brownheads"?) and the occasional whitehead, primarily chin/cheek/jaw, yes I'm ladyshaped but my hormones are a Mess, and Doesn't Do Anything On The Face.)

 

Hmm, this is a tough one. The good news is, there are a lot of cleansers that don't actually need to be used with water at all. The bad news is that most skincare products are pretty much all liquid.

Do you consider, say, a lotion kind of feeling a "wet" sensation? Or an oil? Because if you could handle either one of those, I do have a couple of suggestions. If not, there still may be a couple of things you can do - I'll ask the esthetician at work this week.

 

I wish I had a picture of me when I was sixteen to show you, because that was my hair (until I chopped it off and colored it so much I lost the curl - don't be me, I've learned a lot from bitter experience, haha) so I know exactly what you're talking about. I know it seems nonsensical, but the wide-toothed comb does work.

So, quick breakdown: the way brushes work, as opposed to combs, is by actually "catching" and holding the hair with the bristles. This is okay on dry hair, or if your hair is't very thick or prone to tangles. But if it is, the brush causes more snarls than it fixes. A comb, however, fine-toothed or wide-toothed, just goes through the hair. This is very important when the hair is wet! You may have noticed hair is more "elastic" when it's wet, because of the way water gets into the shaft, but when it's stretchier like that, it's more prone to breakage, which will cause more problems in the long run. You may have to make a few passes with a wide-toothed comb, but as someone who has been there, I promise it works. Just get one that's very solidly constructed - you sound like you might have Comb-Eating Hair. I'm willing to bet you'll snap a fine-toothed comb if you ever got it in there.

If wet-detangling works for you, though, I'd keep doing that, without the brush. I wouldn't tell someone with your hair type to ever brush dry! There are a few general care things you can try on a time when you have more spoons:
a) Oil treatment - get some (food grade) avocado, coconut, or olive oil, whichever one best fits your budget and general smell tolerances, and apply it all over the hair, working it through from roots to ends, combing through if necessary. If you can fit all your hair in a plastic cap (the kind you find at beauty supply stores), do so; this lets the heat of your scalp get to all your hair, which will help the oil penetrate. You can also add heat to a cap with a few shots from a blow dryer if you like. If you can't fit it all, that's fine too! Either way, let it sit for up to an hour. Then wash off using shampoo only.
b) You may want to try a boar bristle brush for dry hair; for some people with your hair type, it can help frizz, because it does bring your natural oils down. If your actual hair strand isn't very fine, then it shouldn't cause frizz.It does have to be a natural-bristle brush, though, synthetics don't work the same.
c) Have you tried braiding your hair before you go to sleep? If it isn't uncomfortable to sleeep like that/your hair isn't so unmanageable that a braid is impossible, I would. It helps reduce tangles a lot.

 

Uh, taking back that Tatcha rec because I just googled it and it's WAY more expensive than I remember it being. It's good but it's not that good. I'll stick with the Origin rec, and also add one more that I really like - Dermalogica's Skin Prep Scrub, which I thought was very hard to find but apparently you can get at Ulta.

@Starcrossedsky there used to be several products on the market that were just... bars that you rubbed directly on the skin, but some of them appear to have been discontinued. So I am looking into that at the moment.

 

I get the spoons thing completely.

Something I forgot (there is a theme here and the theme is that I have bad ADHD): the technique you use when washing/drying your hair can definitely contribute to tangles. I'm off to work right now but I'm happy to give more info on this later if you're interested.

 

so, some observations: my skin does feel kind of tight after washing it; i just used the effeclar and patted it dry afterwards. i assumed this was just what 'clean' felt like, but maybe not? i do have some dry skin between my eyebrows, but otherwise nowhere else.

a friend of mine pointed out that some of what i'm calling blackheads might be sebaceous filaments, which would make sense since only some of them are upraised (generally the ones alone the jawline/chin). the ones on my cheek/nose are generally flat to the skin or even slightly sunken.

moisturizer is going to have to wait till tomorrow night, alas, since i'm working till 10 today.

 

Oh, is that a potential Autism Thing? I've definitely got something similar. Maybe I should poke seebs about that.

 

Never used oils, but lotions are... they're a different kind of wet? A slick wet as opposed to a wet wet. Which I still dislike, but for data purposes I felt I should clarify.

I'm pretty sure it's an autism thing, because it's a Sensory Thing, and people I know who aren't autistic don't seem to have a problem with it? so.

 

I meant like for the initial towel drying. Piling the hair on the head during washing or drying can definitely contribute to tangling. Starting at the scalp and working your shampoo or conditioner all the way down the strand is in general better, and squeezing the water out of the hair is better than rubbing. And there's nothing wrong with drying naturally, lol, it's what I did when I had long hair because if my hair is past my chin it takes literally 45 minutes to blowdry, and that's after I've done the twist towel thing for like 10 minutes.

 

The closest I can find to the "bars you rub on your face" cleansers that used to exist are soaps that exist in bar form (but that you still have to wet your face for), Lush's cleansers (which are more of a clayish, "facial mask" like consistency, but still damp, at least), and One Love Organic's Waterless Beauty Balm, which is a mix of oils which are solid at room temperature, which you rub onto your face and then wipe off with a soft cloth, no water required. Unfortunately, that last one is quite expensive! It does work well on oily skin, though, because oil attracts oil, and it doesn't overdry it like a lot of things do. If you decide you like the sound of any of these, Lush also makes a bar called "Full of Grace" that you just rub on your face if you feel like you need additional moisturization.