Good fucking god, can we NOT drag the ppc into this conversation too? Can we have ONE CONVERSATION that doesn't get worked back around to the ancient ppc grudge for absolutely no decent reason???
Love the rapey analogy there, btw. CLASSY. Going to repeat again that postmod doesn't have to be something you agree to, and you don't get to demand that it stop. I really love shouting into a void and getting absolutely nothing back. No sign of comprehension, nothing. Really rewarding way to spend my time.
No, we... Actually can't. I have a similar issue where my brain gets locked onto one specific issue, for months or even years, and you just can't move on until said issue has been addressed or something worse happens. I'm still not sure how to fix that.
Until people start acknowledging that they were jerks that shouldn't be used an example of proper behavior, I'm going to treat them like maybe they should have had an influence.
i wish i had a time machine so i could go 4-5 years in the future and see which forum gets scapegoat namedropped more, the ppc or kintsugi
The PPC were bad. Athol Magarac was bad. You were both bad. You both done goofed, as they say. It is, in fact, possible for both parties to be wrong in an argument. Them being not-right doesn't make you right by default.
Okay I've actually run out of patience here and that's pretty hard to achieve. I looked through that thread, I read through the links that were active. I saw like. Four examples of people being snarky at you and the rest being people doing what we have been, which is trying to bridge the communication gap and being insulted, dismissed, and made to put in an extreme amount of emotional and mental labor in return for...very little acknowledgement that anything that's being said is actually being processed. You had trouble with a prompt at one point, someone banged an example out for you. You systemically killed off any good will people had toward you via the use of passive-aggressive nonapologies like you have used here presenting anyone taking exception to hurtful things you have said as being either ableist or stupid regardless of their level of expertise on the topic. You were asking that people on a messageboard for sporking fiction give you indepth education about racism in response to being told you said racist things and then got upset when the vast majority of people who are there to pursue a fun hobby were upset by this and didn't want too, and you didn't really listen to the ones who tried. You are very close to achieving the same state here because you have yet to acknowledge that you were wrong in any substantial way without first having to have a thread or conversation in which people spend hours of their lives painstakingly walking you through communication issues that just keep happening. Take notes. Take actual notes for yourself in a physical place maybe, of advice on how to communicate more clearly and without throwing molotov cocktails on every bridge you see. You were the abuser in the PPC situation, unambiguously. Your feelings of hurt are real I have said this like nine times but that does not dismiss the fact that you rather viciously attacked people and then tried to get around their boundaries for a really long time. That doesn't make anyone want to engage with you, to put effort into educating you, to spend any time at all talking to you about stuff. You were wrong. You are not going to be told you were not wrong.
i'm wary of giving narcs room like this, oversimplifying the topic leaves out key information like "she was the only aggressor for years", as in she was the only one in the wrong getting snarked at for being a dumb asshole doesn't make the ppc just as culpable for how badly it all went down for her i see what you're trying to do, but as long as you name her responsible for it in any part she's going to have a problem with what you say. might as well stop catering entirely
I've legitmately lost track of this conversation. i don't know what the topic is anymore. i'm so confused and just tired i debugged the post for you, I told you what the problem was, you misrepresented what i told you here, i'm pretty hard to confuse about this stuff and am normally pretty unflappable but like please please just listen ask questions before declaring what we want you to take away from it 'cause so far every conclusion you have drawn has not been what is being said i walked you through that too
Specifics? Because the trouble with the prompt was the characters that I was using and I don't think anyone has done that. PPC Roleplay: "They're just whining it's unfair and making excuses to cover up how they're a bad writer." I didn't ask them for an in-depth education on racism from the PPC, it was here. I was apologizing for having an invisible mark that made certain people on the street scowl at me, and doing it because I had to apologize for trying to tell the PPC that they were making me upset and that was the only release I had besides constantly going outside to smoke. Someone finally understood enough to explain that they were scowling at me because I was fat instead of something I deserved. And here's where I give up what little ego I have, which is too much and self-flagellating, but also not an acknowledgement of being wrong in any substantial way. I've given an alternative, which is to stop attacking and forcing me to defend myself so much. People accuse me of not-listening when they themselves don't listen.
You're right.. Sitting there alone and hurt and not talking to them except for one day in 2015 was a whole year of abusing them. What should I have done instead?
That isn't what the person you were responding to said. They said something very different. When you substitute in this different thing, it looks like you're intentionally lying about what people said in a manipulative way to try to make them feel bad for saying a bad thing, when they never said that thing at all. What you should be doing instead is not this. I don't think you will achieve any of your goals while you continue doing this.
if i could rate this agree 100 times i would. most of what she says in response to criticism is poorly disguised bait for a "gotcha" it's funny how she asks this question over and over but she doesn't actually want to hear any of the answers, because they involve personal accountability and growth
I can't parse what you mean. Because that thing I quoted there is not an apology or an admission of wrongdoing. I have listened to you, it has achieved not much? you haven't acknowledged anything i've really said except to try and claim I said something I didn't. Look, this comes from compassion, okay? And understanding of your pain, and how awful you felt. Let it go. Find something else to do. Holding onto this isn't healthy. It's never been healthy. It will never be healthy. You aren't going to get what you want from them.
