Reporting the mods

Yeah, so the full conversation is going to be published whenever I get a chance to update tchgb, especially since it is escalating as I type this, but I was uneasy about a semi-private conversation with Athol, engaged anyways, and being uneasy was exactly the right way to feel about that!

RIGHT. Here's the apparent issue: I think it's funny when she tries to hurt me.

I think anything meant to hurt me in any way is absolutely hilarious, whether or not it succeeds. I cackled when I was bodyslammed so hard into the sideboard at soccer that I had to take a day off work. I laughed my head off at my shattered hand that needed two surgeries and still show off the malrotation that I'm stuck with. I gleefully share the story of how I got kneed in the head so hard I almost passed out. I finished all of those soccer games, including the one with the shattered hand, and enjoyed it, because things that ought to hurt me, whether or not they succeed, are profoundly amusing to me.

And those were all accidents, and even the guy who bodyslammed me and the guy who kneed me in the head were extremely apologetic about the whole thing. I still laugh about how careful they were with me the rest of those games, even though I was completely fine. It was hilarious.

And that is for accidents.

If someone tries deliberately to make me hurt, for whatever reason, that is even funnier. How could it not be? Someone is deliberately trying to induce a feels-bad response in me, for whatever reason, and they're poking around, looking for the right buttons to induce emotions in me. That is a hilarious scenario. And I don't really have a strong emotional response to the kinds of escalation I typically see when people try to do that. Words about ugly subjects? Thass cool, I guess. Threats? Well, now I'm braced if you do escalate, so whatever. Graphic descriptions of bad things happening to me? Lmao, wow, I have to immediately show this off to all my friends.

Trying to directly convince me that your safety depends on you controlling my behavior? Ha, no. I'm hard to steer, because I'm autistic, I know that I miss lots of social cues. To steer me on a subconscious level, someone would have to grab onto my emotions without me realizing that's what they're doing. If it's subtle, I'm not going to react. Once it's overt enough for me to notice on any level? Well. That sure is one hell of an abusive tactic, and thinking that I somehow will fail to realize that it's an abusive tactic is extra funny.

I mean, just think about it with other parameters. 'send me your life's savings, or I'm going to drink too much and it will be all your fault.' That's not how things work. Shifting the parameters like that makes it obvious just how absurd it is, how it tries to shove the responsibility for person A's actions onto person B. If I refuse to comply with those demands, my supposed crime basically boils down to refusing to be steered, and trying to say that I'm at fault if you get hurt, because I wouldn't do what you told me to? That is objectively. Hilarious.

The extra degree of clarification I've gotten from the wiggler is that by laughing at the way Athol's abuse fails to work, I am laughing at the way she expresses her pain.

I mean, yeah? Sure?

Because she's trying to take that pain out directly on me. It's really, really funny imagining someone trying to argue that you're not allowed to feel X way about an event that happened to you. You can't be laughing at your broken hand, that's not allowed!! Too bad, fam, it's happening.

Or, in this case, 'yes, I'm trying to control you, but you're not allowed to feel that way about me trying to control you!'

This is inherently absurd. She tries to control my actions, and fails. I respond emotionally. She tries to control my emotional response. Spoiler alert: She fails.

If she was in pain without lashing out at me? Nothing funny about that, nothing to laugh at there. But that's not what happened. What happened was that she tried to say that I was responsible for the alcohol she drank. She tried to say it would my fault if she cut herself. She even implied suicide, which would apparently have been my fault too. Then she posted that thing about how graphically she toooootally wanted me to kill myself. That escalation is just.... golden. The steps are so clear. 'This didn't control her, how can I make it stronger? THIS didn't control her, how can I make it stronger? THIS didn't--'

The fact that she's been trying to hurt me is blatantly, blatantly obvious. She wanted me in distress. She wanted me upset and suffering. And she wanted to control my actions. My actions, which, I remind you-- How dare I keep responding when she talks about me. No, she's not going to stop talking about me, don't be ridiculous.

Guys, it's really funny. I wouldn't find it funny if it was happening to someone else, especially if they weren't as immune to this as I am. But she's trying to hurt me so, so hard, she's flailing around trying to find the right angle, and getting nowhere, and trying extra extra hard to take her anger out on me while she fails to get any purchase on my emotions. I don't feel any shame in saying openly that this shit is hilarious.

 

Just to clarify a thing, the reason we usually let people upload avatars is so they can decorate their account in a way that helps people recognize them, not so they can embed more misogynistic slut-shaming in every post they make. The image in question is gone. I don't really feel like this needs more explanation.

 

it's hard to say which is more frustrating. looking at this shit and saying "i can be better than that", or looking at this shit and saying "i can be better at that".

 

so, athol, remember how you said you'd parsed a thing spock said as a "full blown diva attack?"

thats what this is. christ.

 

This is funny enough to barely even count as a 'threat', honestly.

And yeah. Athol can neither change her profile picture or her signature, because she has conclusively proven that she can't use them politely.

 

It's really debatable what Slenderman does to their victims, besides it being Not Good.
That's one of the primary conceits of Mystery in the whole... mythos?