Kitchen And Craft Wix Corner (Exciteable Bird, Enter At Own Risk)

summon:
- some rare cultivars of apples or roses or pears
- fancy alcohol
- Dragon Age Content

 

summon: heirloom crop cultivars, fashion, parrotlet feathers, historical reconstruction (esp food and fashion)

 

summon:
-cool lipstick
-historical cookbooks
-bjd tools

 

Summon:
-fashion inspo
-herbal liquor recipes
-potential dragon age poly scenarios

 

I love getting lovingly roasted by friends at 2AM <3

 

Summon ivy:
Birbs, medieval cookware, witchy hats, jefree star lipstick.

 

it's fucking hilarious how accurate this is
also as a jumping off point
has anyone ever considered cullen/blackwall, potentially with some alistair in there....?
I just............ sad men with sword.................... they are all so dumb and sad...... they should kiss..............
on a slightly more serious meta note, thom quite idolizes cullen I feel, for 100% owning up to his garbage actions and dedicating himself to bettering shit. Cullen is def pretty disgusted with rainier's lies and actions, but he's still the one to first bring up to the quizzie that you can get thom out. And in a way I feel like he... he knows the darker impulse that led thom to lying and getting stuck in an ever increasing tangle of lies.
On the other side we have alistair having a pretty similar goofy humor to sera, if significantly less filthy in general. And Alistair is a Warden, is a close friend of the HoF, is a hero himself. There's so much to idolize. And he's certainly no stranger to people who've done terrible fucked up shit, like that's.... that's just a thing wardens deal with.
On Cullen's side, well, Alistair was a templar recrute, even if he never took the vows and canonically does not take lyrium. As such he can understand at least ssssssome of the problems with the order and seems the type to be pretty on board with cullen's attempts to fix what's rong with it. But he's also a big jokester and while not entirely unintrospective like parts of the fandom like to paint him, he's a great counter to thom in that he won't let Cullen mope. Also also, Alistair was there for Cullen's pivotal moment of downfall and I feel like he's definitely like one of the few people who would be 100% able to communicate cameraderie and pride about that and not remind Cullen of the worst, in a similar but different way from Leliana's teasing. Especially because unlike Leliana, Alistair never has a contact point with Cullen during his time in Kirkwall where he was a complete bastard.
... Also part of me thinks Cullen's dry sense of humor would lend itself well for making fun of Alistair's status as a royal bastard, even if this verse wouldn't have him be king, bc like, that's too difficult to wrangle, no, he's a sad tired warden aiding the inquisition. And thom doesn't have that contact point, as a marcher, even if he would make the same jokes, let's be real.

 

me, staring at my on meta: wait fuck thom rainier and cullen rutherford are foils for eachother no wonder i love both of their romances so much

 

- new herb recipes, especially for herb liquors
- five additional layers of sweaters
- fancy lippies

 

memes:

no one:
ivy: behold my newest historical book


and to summon an ivy:
- herbs
- good clothes
- dragon age

 

@kastilin is enabling me

Spoiler

vague plot outline! As mentioned above Alistair is the warden contact, and bc I don't feel like that much angst, Hawke will bite it at Adamant, sorry. I want to say like.... just before that he and Blackwall had a few talks, like weird, drunken ones in the dead of night behind the Herald's Rest? About the future of the Order? And then during HLTA Blackwall gets a faceful of Nightmare's fearmongering and guilt tripping and it makes him Think about shit.
Then, unlike canon alistair doesn't immediately fuck off to the Anderfels, because what the hell, he has to prepare some shit for such a travel first, and get the Wardens situated at Skyhold, so Alistair is there for Blackwall taking off to turn himself in.
... Probably insert a scene between Alistair and Cullen and maybe Knight-Commander Barris here? the Barrises have their seat near Lake Calenhad in Northwestern Ferelden, Cullen is from Honnleath and Alistair grew up in Redcliffe proper so those two could reasonably have actually been trained together honestly. Barris possibly, too, depending on how many monasteries for training there are in Ferelden. I just kind of want to say yes, though barris is probably a bit younger than cullen and alistair are, but it would be fun. Anyways This talk is gonna be about Alistair wanting advice on how to fix the Wardens from the two Templars and that's about when a Runner will deliver news of Blackwall's vanishing, so you know, Alistair has to stick around.
In fact I almost want him to keep sticking around and be at least an advisor, given we know fuck all about Lieutenant Suzanne Cloche-sec and also it strikes me as distinctly hilarious to stick him in the same room as Morrigan and Leliana for extended periods of time. Make them all regress to squabbling teenagers. Anyways.
Thom gets dragged back to Skyhold, and formally handed to Alistair for conscription which he distinctly is not sure how to deal with, but he knows who could know. Cullen. And for the last few months of the fight against Corypheus it becomes this... odd dumb dance between the three, trying to make time and figure out what to do between Cullen (overworked, Extremely Disappointed in Thom, but has a great deal of respect for Alistair, But convinced of Alistair's plan to reform the Wardens into a force of Good), Alistair (running around with the Warden forces, cannot be forced to take shit seriously when he's actually at Skyhold because Someone May See Him Be Mature And Force Responsibility On Him, The Horror) and Thom (running around with the Inquisitor, avoidant bastard to a fault, would rather stew in his own misery than talk about shit) until one of them cracks and forces a confrontation and Serious Talk.
Then the battle of the Arbor Wilds happen and the three happen to travel to Skyhold together (owo), probably sharing a tent (owo) because I feel like for ease, Thom would not have been with the Inquisitor's strike team but with the normal army. So they're sharing a tent and tempers are still running high, and it's probably fucking cold, and it is my undying headcanon that Grey Wardens Fuck So Goddam Much, because of the Blight heightening certain tendencies and desires to a boiling point, So Alistair finally decides to deal with the moping and the grim determination between the other two by kissing Cullen Right On The Lips and then doing the same with Thom.
And Then They Fuck.
And then there's a whole political arc I would have to deal with after Cory is dealt with and Alistair and Blackwall finally leave for Weisshaupt and Cullen comes alng to help them. But that's a A Big Empty Space because oof oof politics for a faction I'm lacking major insight on bc I haven't read The Calling and Last Flight.

 

listen
hey
you have good ideas & i like it
also you enable my terrible choices au so i'm just returning the favour >;3c

 

your terrible choices AU is, excuse the pun, fuckign choice, so what am I to do but enable it so much :P

 

pictured: a woman who has never been less sorry in her life

 

also I didn't know cullen has adorable dialogue early in Act 2? Like. You can just. Go and ask ho things are and he's fucking delighted to see Hawke, and genuinely regretful when saying there's nothing for them to help the templars with bc Meredith is on a paranoia kick. (I'm sure this is bc Act 1 Sylvia did a lot of shit siding with the templars bc of Carver but STILL)
Which is to say Cullen and Sylvia fucking between Act 1 and Act 2 is canon and you Cannot Change My Mind

eta: actually bc I derped with investigate options, do you know what he says about feynriel speaking to him first if feynriel is in the circle?

 

If need be I'll back up to an early Act 2 hardsave before going to the gallows and initiate the talk again just for that bc I'm a parody of myself, but ya know

 

1) Local Plain Jane entangled in assassination plot for her Society Belle Employer and Crush through no fault of her own
2) Sad hairy man, sad vain man and pretends-to-not-be-sad jock man fuck in a tent to because of mutual confused and misplaced hero complexes.

 

3) Garbage Gremlins and Local Special Task Force Officer get stuck in a room to shelter from storm. The answer to both anemia and performance enhancing drug withdrawal turns out to be kisses

 

Spoiler: big ole photos of cookings

I am mighty and also amazing

 

I FEEL LIKE SHIT so i'm gonna brainstorm some scent notes for beard oils and after shaves and eau de colognes
should probably have one flowery and one herby/woody/masculine scent per product I think?

flowery:
lavender orange blossom?
rose verbena
bergamot and vanilla?
rose and cardamom

herby/woody:
thyme spruce?
sandalwood and orange and a light cinnamon or ginger note might be nice
basil and Some Citrus Note, tho basil and verbena may also go well??????
part of me thinks it is ESSENTIAL to do something nice with myrrh/incense but I cannot say I have ever smelled that and not died on impact from migraines so I have no idea what may go well with it?