bandit king of lunch and string

i love my seebs

 

.... That made me angry for some reason. W h y

Also the amount of different containers that were used was just wasteful. Now you gotta wash like twenty something containers when you probably coulda done it with 3!!

... Maybe that's why I'm angry xD

 

his whole thing is he's extra in weird ways, he'll take ten steps to do something he could've done in two, just because it's silly.

 

ohhh i see

 

no see that was cute and funny. and the grabbing potato chips to look at under the microscope.

I'm just annoyed at the washing of multiple containers when you could've gone back and forth between two and 1) loss less water/paper and 2) had less things to clean.
You could still do all the extra steps!! just ... so many containers....

idk i'm being silly :P

 

for all i know he loves washing dishes. this is a guy whose whole schtick is manually sharpening every substance on the planet with a whetstone. i think doing tasks by hand is enjoyable for him.

 

ahhhh i'm back on my pain meds and i can feel the cortisone shot just beginning to kick in too. i actually got some good sleep toward morning. then seebs woke me up with fluffy eggs and toast, and i could actually eat the toast! my tooth hole is healed! knock on wood.

also it's going to be light rain all week, and cool but not cold, which is perfect for planting seedlings. i'm pretty sure most of them survived. i'm hesitant to go reconnect with them because i'm feeling emotionally fragile in the way i get when i've been under physical stress for a long time. not as bad as after my big surgery, when for almost three months i couldn't enjoy media with violence in. but i've reached the state where the idea of my plants dying makes me wanna cry. and i'm pretty sure the dome was way too hot for them this past week, because i couldn't reach the roof vent to open it. i can't wrangle the tall ladder.

oh well. i've got half of most of those packets left. i can try again if need be.

aright, now i must ponder who i can wrangle into digging up the side of the garage area, cuz it's full of saplings and grass. they will have to be VERY CAREFUL not to disturb the grapevines. which survived the winter, btw! they are tentatively preparing to leaf! i love them they are so tiny. i'll be planting a row of sunflowers behind them, and squash and melons in front, but i gotta give them room to grow. no clue how fast grapes go when they go. i THINK they'll be fine with just a stake to climb this first year.

unfortunately, i think the total of my spoons today is sufficent just to plant pea seedlings in the raised boxes, and that's it. possibly to sit on my little stool inside the dome and weed the indoor planters so i can put my madder and indigo in there.

i'd ask nick to do the digging, but he's in rough shape because he got ambushed with wheat products the other day. :(

 

piriformis syndrome is SO ANNOYING. you can't sit, you can't lie down, you can't stand up. every position i find that hurts less gradually starts hurting more instead. i've been restlessly moving from position to position for the past 3 days and it is getting SO OLD.

my physio did a small miracle tho, and it hasn't gotten nearly as bad as last time. idk what he did. it was Specialized Medical Butt Touch. they go to school for this.

i'm gonna ask him to show barb what he did so maybe she can help. it might not be something you can do without being an actual physiotherapist tho. he was leaning on some very specific spots in my butt and hip with his thumb, but gently? if you press too hard on a cramped piriformis muscle it freaks out and cramps harder instead of loosening up. he just kind of delicately convinced it to let up for a sec, then rotated my leg while having me keep it completely relaxed. the pain totally went away until the nexxt time i sat on a cold toilet seat.

which was a rude awakening, lemme tell you. i was making plans to get back to gardening, help nick move into his new place, maybe get some naked seebs time, and then YOINCH the thing that holds my leg together decided it hates me after all.

I'M SO BORED YOU GUYS

it's beautiful out and i can't even get down the stairs. BLUH. frustrated.

not that i don't enjoy playing tappy games, petting my cat, and having seebs show me their latest programming successes, but it is not a full life. i wanna go OUTSIDE.

 

btw i told barb about Specialized Medical Butt Touch and she said "the name of my sex tape"

 

so tired of this literal pain in the ass

kronk voice: "why do we even HAVE that muscle?"

 

it's letting up fnally, knock on wood. of course, i'm cognitively flatlining because there is no sensory overload like being in moderate to severe pain for over a week solid. minecraft: fixes everything.

also, now that i'm not exhausted from ouch, i'm hyperactive. but i'm too weak and sore still to exercise. 99% sure there's some muscle tearing in there.

so i'm sleep deprived yet fidgety! i will definitely still take this over last week tho.

 

i'm so cranky and tired. :(

the good news is, the pain is almost totally gone! this is VERY good news, btw. i'm so liking this hardly-in-pain-at-all thing.

the bad news is, i'm still hyperactive, can't sleep for shit, i've been catching like 2 hours in the morning and that's it. but i can't work off the hyper. i'm weak and shaky. i've got about 15 minutes of function and then i need like 3 hours of rest. you would think this would make me not hyperactive, but you would be wrong. so i'm just. twitching. i'm not relaxing, i'm forcing myself to hold still, and that is a very different fucking thing. and of course a week of pain is some pretty effective sensory overload, so i'm cognitively fuckened. like to the point where i get to the end of a sentence and i've forgotten the beginning. you don't know how much rereading and backspacing this pointless fucking paragraph involved and i don't know if i'm even making any sense.

i'm bored. i'm claustrophobic. i think i tore a muscle in my calf. i'm so tired my eyes are crossing, but when i lie down i toss and turn until things start hurting again. nothing is fun. and it's so beautiful outside and i can see my garden boxes from here and they want weeding and WAH.

i don't buy the just world fallacy, but at times like this i undersztand why some people do. it would be perversely comforting to think ideserve this. at least then it would be possible, theoretically, to NOT deserve it, and it'd stop happening.

 

my piriformis is ok now, knock on wood. my calf is still cramping something fierce, though, and my physio says it's not actually a cramp there per se, it's a nerve thing from damage/inflammation higher up in the leg. so all i can do is keep stretched and wait it out. very uncomfortable pins and needles business. do not like.

saved some of my seeds, so that's something.

my brain is so tired. i want to write, but i can't put a sentence together.

tomorrow i go see DOCTOR CHOI: BUTT SPECIALIST!!! actually she's not a butt specialist. idk what she specializes in exactly, but she's going to talk to me about the possibility of nuking my piriformis with botox next time this happens. makes your leg a little weak for a while, but it forces the damn thing to relax right away, instead of me having to spend a week and change in pain while my muscles rip themselves apart. sounds like a win to me.

 

it's not piriformis syndrome. the piriformis is cramping because there is a goddamn CYST pressing on a major nerve.

on the one hand, information! yay!

on the other hand,