Spoiler: disordered eating I am however comprehensively failing to eat. I've had uh one meal today (?) and it's the middle of the night Eta: Spoiler: same food consūmed
I'm behind on meals too, but I'm racing to catch up right now! Can you beat me to having eaten something filling?
gosh... don't feel half bad... amazing how eating food actually strengthens your body me @ me gosh, maybe remember that for next time
*anime character voice* I need to get stronger. I need to train. My laziness, my bad habits... they're holding me back. I can't afford to slack off anymore. From today forward, I'm going to be a force to be reckoned with. You don't believe me? That's okay. Just watch.
I really just need to bite the bullet and double or triple my budget for food. That really is what gluten intolerance is like. I'm scared. No, scratch that. I'm fucking terrified. But going on not treating my medical condition is not an option.
i cleaned off my dresser today but now my floor is even more of a mess. but i bet i can get a path clear to my bed, and anyone who doesn’t think i can underestimates me and my power!!
Spoiler: disordered eating, food insecurity I'm pretty sure I've had three meals a day for the last three days and I'm going on day four I've actually felt like my body has been consistently full of a sufficient volume of food since Friday. ...unfortunately, I have now maxed out my credit card. Not sure what to do next. (There's two months of full payments in the account that the autopay draws from, which I don't use for anything else, but... I can't put any more on the card, and fuck knows where I'm going to get food when the money in my backpack runs out.) so like on the one hand I'm really proud of myself for feeding myself and on the other hand. uh. I have no idea what to do about the underlying problem
yeah appropriate Spoiler: as above + depression on the one hand: I really aced the Taking Care Of Myself thing on the other hand: I did not do so well on the Setting Up For Future Success thing on the third hand: where the fuck were my better options on the fourth hand: the rivals? thread is for bragging and frankly I feel more like I'm giving up. I don't have anything to brag about. I'm backed up against a wall and I'm too tired to move. I can try to do some big impressive thing and one-up my rivals but that'll just burn calories faster. there's no way out. why try
Spoiler: More of the same Surviving quietly despite the universe dragging you down is still a win. Practicing eating enough even if you can't sustain it right away is still a successful experiment! And I have been down a terrible disordered eating hole before, I am super impressed with this, even if you're feeling drained and trapped. Fuck, you've eaten better over the past few days than I have, and I like to think of myself as mostly recovered.
Spoiler: as above yeees, this is progress against the eating disorder. it's impressive that somebody with an eating disorder that's been convincing them to not eat manages to eat that consistently for a period of days. but I am not actually convinced it's progress against the malnutrition! because like. I wasn't rationing food for no reason, you know? and I lifted the rationing and sure enough I'm now running out. so... might be that I coulda stretched that food across an extra week, and now I'm going to ultimately end up doing worse. also, I could be lowering my credit score? I'm gonna make a separate post about that actually, since it's not spoiler related
Okay, partial subject change! hey rivals, I'm having a tough time. I bought a bunch of stuff with my credit card over the course of a few days, and then had it decline a fairly small purchase. from this I infer that I reached my credit limit and have to stop using the card until it renews/whatever that thing is that it does every month. can I keep this from fucking up my credit score? also, is it like, common?
okay, back to your regularly scheduled boasting. I've got 2 loads of laundry to do: bedding, and not bedding. current plan is to do them both today. what do you think?
