mostly roving, partly stars

Today has been mostly a wash, between dramatic over sleeping and what seems to be a building migraine, but in between those Kai helped me get the recipe I really desperately wanted to make set up on the stove, so I'm just grateful for that.

 

We're off to a better start with this Monday, at least? Finishing up my Lamp Time, then clothes, quick check on the model stocking (maybe bring it with me?), grab the store debit card, then off to Joann's. Gotta come home with the notions we need before 3:15. Finish duplicate stitch and start beading. Shower sometime maybe.

I gotta make it through the Thanksgiving crazies, and then we'll just be in normal December crazies without client order stress. And baby blanket should be needed soon. And I'm doing ok on midwinter gift knitting.

*deep breaths*

 

Notions: acquired! We're drowning in Christmas cheer now. Send help. Sequins only come in large quantities, apparently. @.@

 

Jams encouraged me to do nice things for myself and so we got frites and charcuterie at the Brugge! One of the cheeses was recommended with the plum butter and it was a smashing combo, and they actually had the Tripel de Ripple on tap!!! I've been trying to get one for like a year almost, it was so worth the wait. We're waiting for our crepe now :)

 

I have been pretty overwhelmed most of the time lately, but I think I'm OK anyway?

It's hard to tell, tbh.

 

A storm swept in, and Fiyero looked up worried, and then when I said it was okay he just settled down... *heart eyes*

 

I have been very busy (& pretty damn productive!) but I am also struggling mentally quite a bit. Kai concurs from outside observation that doing light therapy in the mornings seems to be reducing brainfog significantly, but it turns out that the fog was proooobably low-key dissociation as a way to cope with sensory overwhelm & trauma stress??? So I'm getting burned out easier, and am a bit more stuck in microflashbacks/touchiness/nightmares about trauma, and :/ :/ :/ I wanna treat my depression, but I gotta build yet more coping mechanisms for the other stuff, apparently.

Anyway, that's a long way of saying sorry I'm not posting much, here or elsewhere on the forum.

 

No need to apologize! Your mental health is more important. <3

 

For all that I've still not been doing great, and today started waaaaaay too early and will involve being out of the house for 15+ hours, I'm kind of looking forward to it! Rose and Mac are getting solar panels installed, and the company needed someone to be home while they work, so I'm roofer-sitting, essentially. I probably won't have to do much of anything, from what Mac has said and from how the guys explained their process when they got here. So I have their spacious house & well stocked fridge/pantry at my disposal, and I packed along all my current knitting, spinning wheel, and books & journals. It's like a retreat day! Just me, fiber arts, their lovely herd of kitties, and some guys doing work outside.

 

Of course, I am immediately consumed with anxiety that one of the cats got out because I can't find her, but the guys say they haven't seen a cat and this is a really big house, so it's possible she's hiding somewhere. :/

 

Okay. According to Mac (and to Kai, who's over here more than I am), this particular cat just does this sometimes, and the other cats would be super dramatically upset if she was actually missing. So she really is probably just hiding somewhere. Good.

...now I have another cat on my lap keeping me from getting my laptop set up for music, though, lol.

 

Clothes moths? Shrieking, overwhelming dread and despair.

Giant wild silk moths? Adoration, love, aspiration to collect and raise their babies for magic silk

 

Look at this gorgeous girl! She's a Polyphemus moth, closely related to tussah moths and produces a very similar type of silk.



Then this is a Luna moth, which is just breathtakingly gorgeous. They apparently don't produce enough silk for practical textile use (to which my brain's response is - special add-ins for blending! or for abstract fiber art! or for witchcraft!), but LOOK AT HOW PRETTY SHE IS.

 

luna moths are stunning *o*

 

big large small friends!

 

Today has been a lot harder than it reasonably should have been, but at least everyone I have spoken to has been really nice. As it turns out, we do not in fact have any emergencies, but some close calls!

I was trying to save spoons for date night with Jams :/

Gonna smoke for a bit & maybe fiber craft, and then start making the appetizer board around 6.

 

So much I could/should be doing, so little pain-free time :/ i'm having a real rough time dealing with winter after a summer where I was in really great shape and doing a lot of stuff! I can probably have higher functioning this winter than previous winters if I cope well, but no, i keep overdoing it and injuring myself.

 

MY NEPHEW IS ON HIS WAY INTO THE WORLD!

 

Wait WHAT

Last I heard she got sent home and isn't in active labor yet?

 

Your information is partially correct! She did get sent home from the hospital a few hours ago, but she is still technically in early labor. He's on his way, just... sloooooow-like.