Fruity Rumpus Asshole Party - D&D Edition [Closed RP]

Lei shrugs. "If you like, that is very generous of you. I thank you for your kindness."

 

["Rose, I would like to protest at my character being offered what's clearly halucinogenics or narcotics of some sort. This makes me uncomfortable."]

Pyralspite shakes her head. "I don't need anything in return, Mr Mann; it's an offer of generosity not a proposed exchange of favours." She loosens the drawstring on her pouch. "Shall we follow the smells of food, and investigate what is available?"

 

[Rose covers her mouth to hide a snicker, but it fails. "Noted. Gamzee, try not to be so, ah, generous, with Mann's special tea to Terezi's character, if you wouldn't mind. Terezi, I'll ask that you raise that objection in-character before I will hold Gamzee too that request." Everyone as supposed to be comfortable, after all. Despite the fact that she personally found it hilarious. Then she shakes out her Altea wig and presents it for Gamzee's inspection. "Does it pass muster? Or should I unbraid it for that bedhead look?" She deliberately does not look at Dave, and desperately tries to project her question as flatly inquisitive.]

 

["CAN WE PLEASE JUST PLAY THE GAME ROSE? MOVE US INTO THE KITCHEN AND GIVE US FOOD OR SOMETHING AND STOP TRYING TO GIVE ME NIGHTMARES." Dave slouches over the table despondently for emphasis.]

 

["I'm just trying to make a more immersive role-playing experience for everyone, dear brother," she replies.]

 

[Gamzee rests his chin in one hand and looks at Terezi levelly. "SISTER I AM TOTALLY ALL RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU, WITH WORKING HEARSTUBS AND EVERYTHING, YOU GOT A PROBLEM AIMIN' THIS CONVO MY WAY?" He seems agitated, but in a wincey, trembly way that makes it clear he knows he just stuck his foot in it bigtime and every word he says is making it worse. "And I didn't say nothin' 'bout no narcotics, I was only callin' it special 'cause that's how the Mann do. YOU CAN TAKE THAT SHIT UP WITH KARBRO IF YOU GET YOUR DOUBT ON, HE'S KNOWING I'M GOOD."]

 

[Terezi turns her head towards Gamzee, although of course her gaze is as cloudy-red and vacant as ever. "I was merely making sure our game's designer was aware of what I am and am not comfortable with, not implying you're still eating something we all know you ran out of. Besides, your character has access to different things than you. I think it's perfectly reasonable to assume a "special tea"," she says, with finger quotes, "has some sort of suspicious substance in it."]

 

["Yeah, well, last I was checking she was all having hearstubs too. YOU DON'T GOTTA TALK AROUND ME LIKE I'M BEING ALL INVISIBLE." The way he's behaving, it's almost like by having people talk like he's invisible, he is invisible. He takes a deep breath, counts to ten frontwards and backwards like Karkat said to, and lets it out slowly. When he speaks again his voice is only shaking a little. "Ain't me or Mann meanin' anybody any kind of harm. WE ARE OUT TO FIGHT SOME MOTHERFUCKING MONSTERS AND WAVE OUR GODDAMN FREAK FLAG HIGH."]

 

["That's right, that is why we're here. Now, let me bring you all back into our narrative." She takes out a knitted auburn and grey beard, and secures it on her face with ear loops.]

"Ah! You're all up, then. Good, good, come on in now, I've got food cooking and I was just about to fetch you so it wouldn't go to waste." Johah's voice booms out, as he sticks his head around the corner of the common room door frame.

 

Pyralspite turns her head to give Jonah a wide and toothy smile, stepping towards him at the instruction. "Mr. Branson, I wanted to thank you again for the lodging you provided us over the night, it was quite lovely. However, I feel like I must insist on paying for any food you provide us."

 

"Pah! Never you mind that, Honorable. If you want to repay my hospitality, then you can eat well and hearty so you're in fit and fighting shape." Jonah beckons them toward the kitchen. "I've got three loaves of fresh bread and a glazed ham I'm slicing now. If you like eggs, I got those too."

 

"But if we fail in our attempt to help your town, you will be out the price of our meals and, potentially, a home." She moves into the kitchen, but is unwilling to eat without paying for her meal. "What if I pay you, and then if we're successful and I return, you have the option of returning the money to me?"

["I roll a persuasion check, right? That's fourteen plus... four, ha! Let's see you deny my money now, Mr. Branson."]

 

["Oh dear. Well, Jonah rolled a natural one, so even with his charisma bonus..."]
Jonah's posture stiffens, and then relaxes. He bobs his head, and extends his hand. "Aye, alright then. You come by your name honestly, Honorable. Sometimes folk have different customs, I suppose. I'll accept your gold. When you come back successful, how'er, there'll be a fine dinner for all of you, on the house."

 

Lei sighs in relief as the argument comes to an end. It really doesn't matter to him if Pyralspite or Mr Hot Dad give him food as long as food happens soon. "Excellent, thank you both. Shall we? I don't want to keep our druid friend waiting."

 

["Mr. Branson's charisma bonus is no match for mine!"]

Pyralspite grins, which as she doesn't have any lips is more just showing her teeth, but the action is well meant. "I find this a perfectly acceptable deal," she reassures both Jonah Branson and Lei (who sighed), pulling three golden disks out of her coin pouch and holding them out to the human.

 

Jonah stares at her, then at the coins, and frowns deeply.
"Honorable, this would pay for lodgings and several day's worth of food, I can't-"

[Rose rolls another die behind the screen.]

He sighs.

"If you insist. You have my thanks for your generosity." He accepts the coins, tucking them away into a small pouch on his belt. "Come on then, all of you."

 

Lei's eyes get huge when the dragon lady forks over that much money for tavern food. "Hey there big spender, how hungry could you possibly be?"

 

"Hungry enough to eat a horse!" Pyralspite winks at Lei and closes her money pouch, confident that this is the proper phrase.