As in, things you feel guilty for liking because other critizise them Thread based on chatter with @Wiwaxia @KathyGaele and @TwoBrokenMirrors Example off the top of my head: BBC Sherlock. A former friend of mine would constantly tell me how awful and not-progessive the show was, and how I should watch this so much morally superior Elementary. (Which pretty much put me off watching that ever). Things is, Sherlock isn´t progessive, but I really didn´t expect a show based on victorian era source material to be, you know? I like it for the story and the novel way of showing it.
I hate the phrase "guilty pleasure." It implies that you should feel guilty about liking things. You shouldn't feel guilty. I mean, you can acknowledge it's bad without feeling guilty. I actually really liked the Equestria Girls movie. Which requires admitting not only that I like it, but that I watched it. What? I thought it was cute. Just completely cute and fluffy.
Think you're missing a bit of context here. As per the original discussion, this is a case where you do feel guilty for liking something, because someone else is criticizing or disliking it, regardless of whether you should or not or any sort of quality concerns. And thanks for making the thread @littlemissCodeless!
I used it because it describes the thing that happens. Basically, it´s not about /should/ it´s about having been made to feel guilty about the thing, even if it isn´t something to feel guilty for. @Wiwaxia my pleasure :3
I am (spitefully) as open and gleeful about my consumption of kind-of-trashy-soft-porn-lit as I can manage to be. Because being afab and femme presenting this is not stuff to read in public but you know. I don't give a fuck about what people think about my literary preferances. Also romance lit in general has lots of 'ew girl cooties' attached, especially supernatural romance stuff gets a bad reputation because of its association with teen girls. I adore supernatural romances. Currently still somehwere in the middle of the Black Dagger Brotherhood which is less trashy and more 'Waiter, waiter, there is a plot in my vampire porn' and 'I accidentally adopted several grown men' If men of about 6'7" with steel muscles in leather pants that have extremely pretty hair and kinda cool eyes and that are also vampires with exceedingly sad and dramatic pasts are your thing and you also like a good helping of kickass female characters being competent and hella and in some cases actively kicking patriarchy's ass (ilu Xhex, ur perf), value your sex scenes with a certain focus on the female orgasm(s) and like cool lore with more tragic pasts shoveled on top then THIS IS YOUR BOOK SERIES. Also Lassiter is a character so if you wanna read about a fallen angel make snarky comments from the sidelines and watch reality TV while being cute and wearing too many peircings, you know. That's a thing. There is a nonverbal character with magical!epilepsyand he is the sweetest thing ever. Especially because everyone learns sign language to communicate with him. Also a character who can't read or write and a blind character. DISABILITY REP. One of the lady characters is a much needed therapist who helps work through several cases of trauma and brainweird! Also legite bisexuality rep. While it's not called by its name that is arguably because it never caused ANY drama in this case, unlike certain other people (is2g Qhuinn and his stupid gay problem) Tumblr would probably HATE it because the first legite queer pairing is sidelined as platonic and one of the gay characters is being a dickhead about himself being gay and calls himself slurs a lot and breaks his LI's heart a whole lot (FFS YOU BIG IDIOT VAMPIRE SOCIETY CAN'T PUNISH YOU ABOUT THIS ANYMORE YOU ARE LITERALLY DIRECTLY UNDER THE PROTECTION OF THE KING YOU DUMBDUMB) And neither Zsadist nor Vishous deal well with their respective childhood traumas and there are some dynamics that are not ideal, but if one can actually do subtlety and nuance one can realize that these things are addressed as maladaptive and toxic and they get worked at and through. So! leather clad vampire warrior beefcake romance. 10/10 would recommend
Oh shit I feel guilty over TBBT, to keep this thread on topic. I see so much shit everywhere shaming the show. I know it's "bad" by Tumblr SJ standards and I just. Keep watching it anyway. So what kind of person does it make me? Yes, I feel literally guilty about that. Even though I think feeling guilty for liking things is stupid. Blehhhh.
hey I get you. TBBT has some good jokes here and there but I kinda stopped watching it because a) on the umpteenth rerun it stops being funny and b) idk to me there is usually like this one joke per episode that kinda overshots funny and goes straight into cringeworthy and it makes me personally feel not good abotu the show but fi you like it that's your thing. A lot of people have tried to make me feel guilty about makeup. I started wearing makeup relatively early and usually don't even leave the house without a full face and a lot of people give me shit about it + my spending habits related to it. Jokes on them the feelings I have about my bare face + public are worse than anythign they can give me lol (its kind of a running theme and I should clarify I have almost no automated shame response so people attempting to shame me for stuff usually gets the immediate 'I WILL INCREASE THE FUCKING THING THEN' response. self-loathing and -pityig, yes but I'm not good at feeling ashamed)
I feel guilty for liking cosmetics when normally I'm like GET YOUR GENDERED SHIT AWAY FROM ME. I love obnoxious lipstick, for example. And nail polish. I literally do not wear any other cosmetics. But I feel like a gender traitor or something, even though I genuinely like that. I feel weaponized when I'm wearing edgy lipstick, or awesome lacquer. @IvyLB there's actually one episode that has a transwoman joke in it that kind of makes me want to cry. I still watch the show.And if the show is trash, what am I? Nahmean?
@pixels joining the "was made to feel bad for makeup" crowd. And personally, I am all for makeup being de-gendered. I wanna see more male type people in it, and female type people not being pressured to wear it "right". My type of makeup is all wrong by convential beauty standards and I really don´t care.
@littlemissCodeless fucking same tho. I don't wear makeup to make you feel comfortable. I actually wear it to make you uncomfortable. I don't understand foundation, or eye makeup, but I do understand the bold lips aesthetic, and my lips are fucking plush so why wouldn't I show them off. Also nail polish is a thing I perseverate on, you should see my collection. (Still haven't posted pictures in the general forum, remind me to do that sometime next week.) More people with beards wearing bold Nyx lipstick please and thanks.
my ideal makeup aesthetic is "Ethereally attractive yet alien and kind of threatening" or you know "grungy androgynous and on their 3rd coffee" when I'm lazy. I'd probably fill my eyebrows in if the literal apocalypse was happening outside and i don't even care that that's shit priorities no one needs to see my natural eyebrows. also the people who shit on guys wearing makeup like. excuse me. EXCUSE ME? HAVE YOU SEEN HOW HOT GUYS CAN BE WHEN THEY DO CONTOURING? WHEN THEY WEAR EYELINER?????????? AND WITH KICKASS LIPTICK? WHY DO YOU NOT LIKE NICE THINGS?
I´m quite an eyemakeup girl, because i have a slightly unusual eyeshape and I like playing with it. @IvyLB I´m the same from the other side, my eyebrows suck so i shave them off and draw new ones on. Also did this forum have a makeup thread yet? if not, we should make one.
idk but yoooooo make a make up thread I'm planning on doing a youtube channel with makeup tutorials!!! (okay character makeup mostly but same difference) and I have lots of makeup textwalling in me oops
The thing that really nails me with things like this (not makeup, feeling-bad-for-liking-things in general) is that I'm a stupidly loyal person, and I get really defensive when something I like/am loyal to is criticized. And then when the person doing the criticism is also someone I'm loyal to, I just get this really weird unpleasant dissonance that settles in my chest and can take hours to figure out what's actually bothering me. :/
Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality. It just hits a lot of my "yes" buttons. Like, I love stories about characters finding loopholes in systems of rules, and I love stories where characters solve problems with their brains, and I love stories that talk about philosophy, and I am a rationalist, and I love stories with a battle of wits. I know the protag is a Mary Sue and that he gets a lot of the science wrong and there's a bunch of thinly-veiled bigotry. Which is all stuff I hate in other stories, but this one presses enough of my "yes" buttons to outweigh that for me. I never found the time to finish it, though.
I've managed to stop feeling guilty about all the stuff my mom has been trying to make me feel guilty about (eating not-dark-chocolate and drinking not-dark-cocoa, wearing make-up, wearing waisted clothing...), but archaeology (reading about it, because I haven't yet managed to drop by any of their lextures) is one (lifetime of "but it's unprofitable!" whenever I mentioned that it was interesting) and writing ("too complicated!" "you won't make money with it!" blergh.).
I am pretty sure that should I ever make a career of my writing it will mostly be mass-marketable-romance-novels or obscure genre-deconstructing exercises, possibly both at the same time under different pseudonyms because I like writing that stuff it's fun. I just have trouble with ever finishing anything.
if we're talking about things that people have tried to make me feel guilty for liking then spongebob squarepants and sci fi are at the top of the list. i went through a big chunk of high school afraid to talk about my favorite cartoon because this one asshole in particular relentlessly asked why i liked it and my answer of "it's just mindless fun, it's silly" was never good enough. the sci fi thing was mostly when i was younger, because i knew a lot of the sort of people that think girls should play barbie, not read star wars novels. things i actually feel guilty about liking... high school musical, probably. it has absolutely no redeeming qualities and everyone seems to hate it. i could watch it ten times in a row. i have no idea why, i couldn't point out any specific part that i like.
ta for the tag! i will dump my collection of guilts here when explaining things feels less like wading through molasses. this week has been the week of being really fucking tired
I also really like TBBT. I still love most of the episodes when they do reruns, and I can word-for-word quote some of the scenes. They just make me feel really happy :) Although, apparently, as an autistic person, I am supposed to hate TBBT for their horrible characterization of Sheldon. And also the way his friends are. I just really, really love it.
