Spoiler: context I've never been in a bar before. My fiancé wants to go to some local bar that has an assload of video game consoles hooked up and play games while doing an alcohol with lots of friends. This is a post-birthday celebration for him. Thing is tho like. I have all these conceptions of bar social rules bc of media and stories from family, but I've never done a bar before, myself. He really wants me to go but I don't think I'd be able to handle the environment / overwhelming anxiety of not knowing wtf to do or say or how to act. I figured some other people might like the insight on How To Bar, so feel free to skip personal advice to me and go for the general.
Spoiler: specific advice Okay so, with the caveat that all the bars I've been to have been pretty small and lowkey, there's not really any actual rules that differ from how you would act in a restaurant or an arcade? You're going with your fiance and friends, so you aren't actually expected to Do A Social if you have no interest in it-- if you've done big group birthday parties before, that's a good protocol to follow. Since the video games are part of the appeal here, I think picturig the bar as like... a friend of a friend's house for a big drunken video game party is a good way to try and bleed of anxiety over media expectations. More generally, I'm finding that most bars aren't nearly as... social? as I expected them to be. If you wanna just chill with your friends in a corner or by yourself, that's totally okay. Which is a HUGE RELIEF for me, ngl.
I have never heard of a video game bar before, but it sounds pretty awesome! And it sounds like it will probably be more relaxed than a lot of bars, and not have music blaring the way some shitty bars do. (That's more common in clubs, anyway.) You can always bring some earplugs if you're worried that it might be too loud, though; they're pretty subtle, and they actually help you hear people talk by blocking out background noise (if there is a lot of background noise). Sometimes people go straight to the counter to order their drinks, and then find a place to sit after they have their drinks in hand; other times they'll go find a table, then get up to go to the counter. The first one is usually something you do if the place is really crowded, because there's no point finding a seat if someone else is just gonna take it when you get up to order a drink. I don't think that's likely to happen in this video game place, though, because it sounds more sit-downy than clubby - you can't expect people to be standing around and/or dancing while holding their drink AND playing video games, so presumably there'll be plenty of sitting and table space. If someone buys a drink for you, then you don't have to get them one later in return, but they will appreciate it if you do. It's a nice, friendly thing to do when you're in a group like that. However, it's perfectly OK to just stick to buying your own drinks and nobody else's. And if you don't want to drink alcohol, you can order a soft drink like soda, or you can just ask for some tap water, which will be free. The menu might be on the wall behind the bar, or there might be menus you can pick up and look at. If the bar has a website they might have a menu on there too, so if you're nervous about choosing your order, you can look at that in advance. In general, if there are a lot of people around, then it's best to know what you're getting before it's your turn to order; if the bartender asks you for your order before you're ready, you can tell them you're deciding and that they can go ahead and serve the next person. If the menu is behind the bar and you want to take some time deciding, then stand several feet back from the bar while you look, because then it doesn't look like you're ready to order. This is all that comes to mind right now as general advice; do you have any questions about what to do in specific situations? *eta* KingStarscream is right, though - think of it as being more like a party with your fiancé's friends, except it's in a big room where some other groups of people are having their own separate parties. And instead of having to bring your own drinks or serve them to your guests, you can just go and buy them, and there's a much wider range than there would be at home. :)
There is a bar like that where I live and can confirm it is pretty chill. You don't usually see any fights or anyone getting cut off in my experience. Basically you don't have to talk to anyone if you don't want to, and you and your friends can just do your own thing and not be bothered. There is one thing people do where they will put quarters on the machine to claim next, but that is the only social rule I think would be important to remember. You can treat it like a restaurant where everyone is drinking and playing games in other social rule respects. I hope this was helpful!
