I am upsetting my family, because they can't work out how to help me, and are frustrated by my inability to provide direction for solutions. It's a difficult thing to articulate because I'm not even sure what I want, and my inability to properly articulate this stuff makes everything even more fraught. I'm uncommunicative at them, they assume things or guess things based on the little information I give them, and then I get frustrated at them for not reading my mind well enough, I guess? They try to get me to do things, like exercise more, get out more and so on. Gentle prodding doesn't work, straight up asking me doesn't work, and then it kinda descends into raised voices and hurt feelings on both sides. It's really frustrating for all of us, I think. It doesn't help that I'm depressed, autistic and have a severe lack of volitionary executive function (possibly due to ADHD). I don't know and can't seemingly apply any strategies to properly cope with the problems I'm having - and my family are asking how they can help me, but I can't articulate my needs to them successfully, or even know what my needs are in the first place. I am not sure how to proceed. Thinks? P.S. - I'm not sure if this is a Brainbent-worthy material.
Seeking concrete advice fits here or in Brains fine! My first thought - have you experimented with alternative communication at all? When I'm stuck and need help, it's often easier for me to type, or gesture using a pre-arranged sort of familial sign language. My sister tends to draw us diagrams when she's nonverbal. This kind of thing requires some cooperation from family, but when I try to force myself to TALK in some situations I shut down completely, so communicating half a message is sometimes better than none. I also highly recommend what I call brain science. Sometimes you have no idea what will help: that's when you try something anyway, and then write down what the problem was, what you tried, and if it helped. It's slow going, but you can build a good database of personalized coping methods that way.
That's good to hear. I'm not certain that my problem here is a lack of ability to communicate, more a lack of ideas on my part. Maybe it's not particularly fair of my family to expect all the answers from me, the one with volitional problems, but I'm still not being helpful, here. I think that I'll give this a go! Sounds like a very good idea.
Looking up databases of coping methods to just Try even if you have no idea if they'll work sounds like a good plan, then! I'm awfully fond of my Booster Buddy app, which has some mood tracking and reminder features in addition to a huge library of coping skills, but I know it's too cutesy for some people.
