So like, I feel a lot of depression symptoms when I'm in school. Like, detachment, inability to concentrate, feeling like all my work is worthless, extreme executive dysfunction (It has taken me ~4 hours today to take notes on like 8 pages of anatomy lesson with 2-5 paragraphs each page), i get less interested in my interests, and occasionally dissociate and stop feeling like i'm totally real or in control of my actions buuut i have never had any of those symptoms near as extreme when out of school (to be fair, a thing that I have only been during summer months so far in my life, im in my last year of college and have never taken breaks from school). Like, my mood lifts, I'm able to socialize at least, and I've only ever dissociated or felt other spirals when there's other stressful things happening. The only thing that stays is the executive dysfunction (my record for functioning is managing to do about 3 hours of drawing per day for a week or two when i was trying REALLY HARD to be productive this last summer; i had literally no other responsibilities and on average left the house about a half hour per day to go on a walk with my mom) so like. does it still count as depression bad enough that i should go get evaluated by a psychiatrist for diagnosis and talk about meds? like, i feel like i can't fix my executive dysfunction problem on my own rn because i'm just so exhausted by the pressure of homework all the time that its super difficult to get started and do the thing. but. is it something i shoudl medicate if its specific to like, doing schoolwork, which will soon become a non-thing? note that ive never held a job (other than a 2 week state fair job) so i have no fuckin clue what job stress will do to my brain idk i just feel weird about taking my issues this seriously
i 100% meant to just ask 'does depression still count if u only feel depressed 75% of the time' but then it got complicated in my brain, sorry. not as quick of a reality check as i thought but like my brain disbelieves anyone who doesnt know my full situation so. bluh
So, first off yes, you should be taking this as seriously as you are. This is depression, bad, and it's got a habit of kicking up worse during times of stress. Especially since you've got ongoing executive function problems even when you're not experiencing the other symptoms as extremely. I'd say that looking into medication options is definitely a thing you should be doing, even if you're not sure if schoolwork is the primary trigger. Because the last thing you want is to find out that yes, job work is also a trigger for stress spirals three weeks into a job without any sort of psychiatric care in sight. (For reference: depression runs in my family, and my depression tends to sit on the lighter edge when I'm not doing school or job stuff. It's still depression, and if medication is a viable option, it should be explored.)
you know, it might be a combo of school stress & seasonal depression, which is what i think i deal with. but yeah definitely go look into meds!! your description sounds very similar to what i've dealt with--which, in retrospect, was Really Bad. you are totally justified in seeking help.
Depression can defs be exacerbated by circumstances, especially ones as stressful and isolating as higher education can be. It was like that for me. It's still valid and can still benefit from treatment.
My depression got really bad when I left high school and during part of college due to other factors in my life. Depression + other stressors is a bad combination. Do not be worried about getting help, it's a good idea.
Depression doesn't have to be 100% of the time to be depression, or to be something that you're allowed to get help with. For example, my dad and I take consistent depression meds, but my mom only needs them situationally. Hers is very much triggered by specific circumstances, usually when there's a lot of stress happening. The doctor still diagnosed her as having depression, and she was able to get treatment. So yeah, you are completely justified in trying to get help and support in whatever fashion.
For what it's worth, I also struggled with serious depression symptoms last year when I went to college. This semester I took a break from college, and some of those symptoms did alleviate... for a while. But I was still dealing with anxiety and executive dysfunction, and sometime in October the depression really crawled back in again. So. I feel you.
Thanks guys uwu; I'll try to actually manage and call around and get an appointment today,, hopefully I manage
hey man, since i know we go to the same college, ill just say that you definitely arent alone in feeling that way here. my depression and anxiety got so bad last year i had to drop two classes and barely scraped by on the single class i was taking, and then over the summer my symptoms almost totally went away. cue school starting up again and im dealing with the same exact shit. the only difference this time is that im actually on meds, and now im able to handle a full load and generally be an Actual Human Being when i need to be. rough patches happen and they suck, but having the support of a doctor and medication to fix some of your brainweirds helps so much after the hurricane i had a really bad downswing and skipped assignments in all my classes, but i dont feel like a waste of a human being for doing that! meds are amazing *fistbumps* u got this
Oh my god same, the hurrication messed me up so much, I too skipped assignments in all my classes (-cries apologies to Dove, he deserves better-)
