"Okay, is it just me, or is there a robotic voice saying 'titties?'" "Yeah, there is." "I heard titties too." "Okay, let's watch the chat box and see whose name lights up." Nobody speaks, nothing lights up. "That was the strangest ghost ever." "No, I think a ghost would say BOObies"
Something yesterday reminded me: there's a burrito restaurant in Morgantown which has a menu full of puns, and every time I've gone past they've had a board out front advertising a daily special with a Bob's-Burgers-level pun name. A tikka masala burrito called "Hakuna Masala" particularly stuck with me. Or the honey mustard chicken tacos called "Honey, We Need to Taco."
(My sister works in a daycare.) Sister: We're getting rid of the potties, and [coworker] suggested that we repurpose them as planters. What should we plant in them? Me: ... baby's breath? Sister: No, peas!
i just realized that since the silverwing series has the characters go to bat hell, its plot literally involves the title of a meatloaf song
coworker 1: This bacon gouda is better than usual. me: You might say it's very gouda. coworker 1: I love you so matcha. coworker 2: Oh lord. coworker 1: Don't worry, I'll chai to be good coworker 2: I regret the series of decisions that led me to this point in my life.
So a guy runs into a toy store frantically looking all around, when a kid sees him and asks, "What ya doing?" Guy answers " Looking for something I lost? I was told the best place to find it was here." (Now note the guy is not the best dressed or the most pleasant smelling either...... kid says, "what are you looking for? " " my marbles. "
So is it bad when you go walking though Wal-Mart and all you look at makes you try to come up with puns. My life is pool of pun........lol
Me: I wish someone could help me. Friend: Why, what's up? Me: I have a lot of wood and can't think of anything. Friend: So what's the problem? Me: I'm board.
so the bumblebee shouldnt be able to fly, right? but you dont hear the bumblebee brag about it. its a very humble creature. a humblebee, if you want.
steve rogers relaxes in the shade on clint's farm on a pleasant 10 degree day. he has finally become a cool ranch dorito
A favorite for a long time, source unknown: They say all sheep are alike, but actually they have mutton in common. Works a lot better spoken than written.
