shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

like fuck i'm going anywhere near her. she's 200% less annoying than my universe's catpeople and 500% more dangerous-looking

i'd sooner fling myself into a school of space carp

its okay, i wouldnt bet on the clown either

*the clown attempts to slap the cat with one of his clown horns*

 

Ford laughs. "Neither would I," he says, grinning.

 

there's no denying it, she'd kick my ass, if i had one

ive never been able to afford a synthetic ass after the robutticist stole mine, since i keep spending all my cash on drugs and banana crates

so i had the crew surgeon give me a flesh buttflap instead

 

!!!

-Purrs loudly and then flops, rolling around. He seems to have enjoyed that, what a little weirdo.-

 

*the clown begins to repeatedly slap the cat with the horn, harder than it did before*

 

-Trills and then hops up, arching his back and doing the cork-screw curly-q thing with his tail. Loud purring.-

 

okay so the cat is into that i guess

time for plan b

*the clown reaches into its custom giggles von honkerton backpack and pulls out a spray bottle of space cleaner*

 

WHY WULD U WANNA HURT A MEOWBEAST WAT THE HECK!!??

 

*the clown spritzes demmel with space cleaner*

honk :o)

 

hey dudes. it's me again. your pal Seagull. actually. I don't know who most of you guys are. or if we could be considered "pals". and one of you is sort of. off-putting. yes you. with the honks

*the seagull, in a moment of deep hypocrisy, screeches with moderate volume*

oh shit whoops. I swear I'm working on that. anyway. any of you got a snack that you could pretend you were super upset about losing. also. has anyone seen the big blue mechanical thing. I miss him

:(

 

maybe i VWOULD accidentally drop something prime and delicious, if you hadnt treated me like shit the LAST time i did.

 

There are a lot of blue "mechanical things". You will have to be more specific than that. Uh. Sir.

 

PBBBTTTTHHH yuk D: D: D:

 

man I thought we were past this. I thought that we were friends. also. my memory is not super great. because I'm a bird. so I can't remember the rude thing that I said. but in the interest of maintaining my "personal growth". I apologize

what's a "sir". I'm a bird

*the seagull pecks forlornly at the ground, which does not go clang*

he was musical. and very nice. and very big. and he didn't have any snacks. he went clang. and he has a red-looking sister. who did not have any snacks. and also did not go clang. I'm not good at identifying mechanical things

 

It means Stentato. They made... much noise the last time they were here together. Whether it could be called "music" depends on how strictly one defines the word.

[She wasn't part of the screeching last time, what are you talking about?]

 

Ah! I fear @Stentato of Devisiun is currently on shift in engineering and thus cannot be available in this space at the time being! I- ah- can take your message if you would like, Si- Mister Bird?

 

we were going to go to a "parties". and I was going to become. a "member of society". with my newfound musical career and resulting "personal growth". luckily I'm very independent. and continued my "personal growth" unassisted. but. that was my best day ever. and I miss him

:(

 

please. call me Seagull

*the seagull ponders what it would like to say and patters around in an anxious circle. it does not have the social skills for this kind of advanced interaction.*

man. uh. um. tell him

*the seagull pecks at the ground, despairing at the lack of clanging*

please tell him. that we still need to go to a "parties". and also that. I miss him

 

*the clown begins to hurriedly stumble away from demmel, running about as fast as one can while wearing giant squeaky clown shoes*

*the clown drops a suspiciously butt-shaped sandwich on the ground*

 

*dutifully notes it down on his datapad like a good little Assistant*
Very well, I will, Mister Seagull, Sir!
*he gives the bird a very bright and enthusiastic smile*