I've been thinking about trying a forum text adventure like Jailbreak or Rubyquest for awhile but the notion of getting sucked into a lot of extra drawing really bummed me out because I'd spend too long on the illustrations, and then put off doing updates because I didn't want to spend too long on the illustrations, then abandon the whole story because I felt bad. So I'm gonna be drawing everything with my opposite hand so it stays shitty— in the grand tradition of forum text adventures— and I don't have to give a fuck. Worst case scenario, I end up ambidextrous. We're going to start with a cat. Because, cat. You are a CAT and haha WOW I CAN'T DRAW WITH MY LEFT HAND. You are at the end of a painstakingly rendered HALLWAY and have no idea what the fuck. There are TWO DOORS, probably.
Incredible! You've found a ROOM at the end of the HALLWAY. Maybe it's an office or something. There's an assortment of poorly-rendered items: a SPINNY NOISE DISK, a WHEELY CLIMB OBJECT, and an open CARDBOARD LUXURY CUBE.
Ignoring the STUPID FUCKING SCRIBBLE that appeared on the wall because I don't know which layer it's on and do you know how hard navigating photoshop's tiny little buttons is when you're scrawling desperately with your bad hand, it's really hard, anyway, you INVESTIGATE the WHEELY CLIMB OBJECT. It is incredible. DELIGHT LINES radiate from your presumably adorable kitty noggin. A sense of accomplishment fills your kitty chest. While sitting, you can THINK ABOUT STUFF.
You ponder the SCRIBBLE. Why would anyone do that to a wall? Was the intention art, or a desperate communication, or might it perhaps of been a sheer accident of fortune that caused this vexing confluence of markings, not dissimilar to the way random happenstance rules all things and makes mockery of the greatest plans of mortal kings— oh hey it seems like you're actually pretty smart. You still don't know what the fuck's up with the WALL, though. Maybe some asshole did it just for kicks.
NEVER BEFORE HAVE YOU KNOWN SUCH JOY. Your inspection of the CARDBOARD LUXURY CUBE is somewhat less intellectual than your inspection of the scribble, because jumping IN and OUT of the cube has rendered you JAZZED AS FUCK. All you know is it's cardboard and it's a cube and you are in love.
You give voice to a CLASSICAL HAPPINESS SCREAM. Damn, your people's musical composers know where it's at.
There are not enough :D's in all the world to express my delight with this forum adventure. >Cat: combine CARDBOARD LUXURY CUBE and WHEELY CLIMB OBJECT.
Okay, this seemed like a great idea at first but now you're a little stuck. If you pull the BOX on to the SEAT with you you'll fall off! But if you let go of the cube you will be ADMITTING DEFEAT. Which you NEVER DO.
