Anecdata: Autopilot error

i do things like this a lot too. one of the main things i do is try to push my glasses back up when they're slipping but then i'm not even wearing them at the time and i just sort of boop the bridge of my nose awkwardly.

i can also never seem to put on a matching pair of socks, i don't usually wear them and even when i'm actively thinking "get matching socks" over and over i'll look down later in the day and one will be something like a bright orange low cut sock and the other will be a green and blue striped no show sock.

 

awkward megane anime character ivy does this too

 

I totally match my socks by length, not by color/pattern finding matching socks on autopilot is haaaaaard.

 

The actual worst: misplacing your glasses. Because you need to see. To find the glasses. You need the glasses to find the glasses. THE ACTUAL WORST

The other actual worst was when I consciously told myself "I am going to the bookstore" and missed not one but two turns to get there, because first I was autopilot-for-takeout and second I was autopilot-for-home. Why must all these things be conveniently on the way home?

 

I don't have that problem with socks 'cause having a different length or texture on either foot is instantly noticable to me, eheheh.

I just remembered my favourite collective autopilot error story! So, my family does morning prayers at home fairly often, and since it's been over a decade since we started we have the morning prayer service from the 1979 BCP (Book of Common Prayer) pretty much memorised. Part of that service is the Apostle's Creed. And we said the Nicene Creed in church pretty much every Sunday for about eight years, so we have that one memorised too.

...So apparently one morning all five-plus members of the family in attendance were on autopilot, and all of them we malfunctioning, because we started out saying the Apostle's Creed and then seamlessly slipped into the Nicene Creed starting from "And I believe in the Holy Ghost". And didn't notice until a couple of lines into it. Every single one of us.

 

Fortunately with glasses my problem is distance vision, but close things are completely clear.

 

Oh gods, yes.

Also for glasses - when I started wearing contact lenses I would constantly try and push my glasses up my nose. Where there were no glasses. Problems. (Also I would occasionally put my glasses on while wearing lenses, which didn't go well at all.)

 

I have several times now thought that i should go put book one back in the shelf and get book two. I even got up...and got a drink instead.

 

Yesterday at work I kept accidentally grabbing people's things like drinks, air fresheners they wanted to buy, and other stuff like that instead of the ticket so I could give them their total.

Autopilot why

 

Day 16. Clothes that need to go to the dry cleaners are still in my car. I still drive past the cleaners twice a day every single day. Not once in 16 days have I managed to switch off my autopilot for the ten minutes it would take to drop the clothes off.

 

Sooo I was gonna boil some eggs. So I put eggs in a pot and turned the heat on. I did not put water in the pot.
Thankfully I noticed it before anything bad happened.

 

i feel so many of these posts.

lately my autopilot has been directing me to websites that i never meant to visit. if i open my laptop with the intention of checking my email or doing actual work, my hands will automatically open chrome and type an "f," a "t," or a "v" into the address bar (taking me to flight rising, seebs, or vastderp, respectively).

it's nice to visit the sites i regularly look at, i guess, but my original goal vanishes from my working memory as soon as i start browsing any new content. hours of internetting later, i suddenly remember that i meant to be buying a bed or something. sigh.

 

First I tried to put ice cubes in the salad crisper, then put the bottle opener in the fridge, then dumped my bottle tops in my glass of ice instead of the bin. This glass of cider is not meant to be.

 

That moment when you find something in the freezer that doesn't go there and turn slowly to the pantry because, where's the ice cream... :(

 

> bottle of soda in lap
> plastic bottlecap in left hand
> uncapped pen in right hand
> god damn it now my nib is smashed

 

>stab self in hand with mechanical pencil because you assumed you were holding it eraser-up
>at least it wasn't the compass point

 

> scratch blister
> ew gross
> clean blister
> put on polysporin
> put on bandaid
> leave bandaid residue on counter
> throw polysporin in the trash

i am so smart you guys

 

That sounds like my kind of trick, @pixels.