Anecdata: Autopilot error

Discussion in 'Braaaaiiiinnnns...' started by Elaienar, May 15, 2015.

  1. kastilin

    kastilin get in the fucking crayfish shinji

    i stuck a full container of cream cheese in the dishwasher & made it all the way back to my room before realizing that the dishwasher is not, in fact, where food goes
    • Witnessed x 12
  2. Misty Pond

    Misty Pond Well-Known Member

    almost threw one of my medication pills into the bin instead of the foil seal from the blister pack
    • Witnessed x 10
  3. vuatson

    vuatson [delurks]

    *pumps hand soap dispenser thing with one hand*

    *stares at other hand, still held under the faucet, wondering why soap hasn’t appeared in it*
    • Agree x 4
    • Like x 2
    • Witnessed x 2
    • Winner x 1
    • Useful x 1
  4. LadyNighteyes

    LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

    Today's accomplishments: carefully measured out a teaspoon of Worcestershire sauce, and then dumped it on the counter.
    • Witnessed x 8
    • Winner x 2
    • Useful x 1
  5. Deresto

    Deresto Foolish Mortal

    I had a cup of oj while whisking scrambled eggs for breakfast the other day, in cups from the same set. I ended up cracking an egg into my oj and barely missed drinking raw egg orange juice
    • Witnessed x 10
  6. Everett

    Everett local rats so small, so tiny

    Pretty minor but i keep my house key and the bathroom key for work on the same "section" of my keys

    I have repeatedly tried to unlock my house with the bathroom key and open the bathroom with my house key. They are not the same colour or shape
    • Witnessed x 3
    • Agree x 1
  7. jacktrash

    jacktrash spherical sockbox

    • Agree x 9
    • Like x 1
  8. jacktrash

    jacktrash spherical sockbox

    i just reread this whole thread, and here is a sort of META autopilot error: i just ASSUMED that i had posted my best autopilot error already, but it isn't here!

    in high school, i was dating a guy who lived way north of minneapolis, and i lived way west of minneapolis, so it was a long ass drive. i didn't mind driving, i was kind of a gearhead and i had a tape player in my car (this was the 80's) and a stockpile of tapes so i'd just pop in the ramones or something and sing along and enjoy the alone time. i had nearly an hour commute every morning to school anyhow. i mention this so you know i was used to drives taking quite a while, and being on the highway, and not really worrying about the time.

    so one weekend evening, i'm heading home from spider's house and hollering along to the pixies, it's kinda sleeting but my crapass mad max-ified subaru has 4wd and is taking the roads like a champ, and of course i'm sleep deprived as fuck because i always was back then. and eventually i go to switch my tape and i realize that instead of suburbs, what i'm seeing beside the freeway is... dense pine forest.

    where the fuck am i?

    i take the next exit, pull into a truck stop, and go into the mcdonalds to pee and buy a cup of coffee and figure out wtf. i get up to the counter and there's this glassy-eyed kid even younger than me, and i tell her about how i zoned out on the freeway and obviously missed my exit. "so like, where actually am i?" i ask her.

    she blinks. "mcdonalds," she replies.
    • Winner x 16
    • Witnessed x 3
    • Informative x 2
    • Like x 1
  9. Saro

    Saro Where is wizard hut

    I try to use my car key to open the lab relatively frequently. In my defense the keys are sorta similarly big, but otherwise completely unlike each other. Shout out to the time I did in fact try to unlock the lab by pressing the door unlock button on the car key for extra autopilot error points
    • Winner x 7
    • Witnessed x 3
  10. jacktrash

    jacktrash spherical sockbox

    oh, btw, when i actually got an answer, it turned out i was just short of albert lea. i had gone a full hundred miles out of my way.

    Screen Shot 2019-07-08 at 12.27.15 PM.png
    • Witnessed x 4
    • Winner x 2
  11. PotteryWalrus

    PotteryWalrus halfway hideous and halfway sweet

    The amount of goddamn times I put the kettle on to make a cold drink I swear to god...
    • Witnessed x 5
    • Like x 1
    • Agree x 1
    • Winner x 1
  12. idiomie

    idiomie I, A Shark Apologist

    I'm watching the SDCC panel linked in the Steven Universe thread, and I keep instinctively trying to clap with the crowd, or when prompted ("let's give a big round of applause for-")
    • Like x 4
    • Winner x 3
    • Agree x 1
    • Witnessed x 1
  13. jacktrash

    jacktrash spherical sockbox

    why is that so cute?
    • Agree x 5
    • Like x 1
  14. anthers

    anthers sleepy

    Moved a slice of bread earlier and squirted the sandwich mustard directly onto the cutting board and then stared at it in confusion for a few moments.
    • Witnessed x 10
    • Winner x 1
  15. chthonicfatigue

    chthonicfatigue Bitten by a radioactive trickster god

    Earlier today, Li tried to put the kettle into the mug cupboard.

    I just sat down and attempted to take off my socks. I haven't been wearing any socks today. Extremely confused for some seconds until I figured it out.
    • Witnessed x 7
  16. WolffyLuna

    WolffyLuna Active Member

    I was sanding some rock samples for looking at them under a microscope later.
    What the process should have been: Sand rock for ~5mins --> Occasionally use paper towel to wipe water off rock to check the progress of sanding --> After 5 mins, wash sandpaper, move to next grit size.

    I mostly managed to follow that process.

    But after two hours of sanding rocks, this happened: Hold rock sample --> head towards paper towel dispenser --> ??? Forget I was meant to dry rock --> Stand next to sink --> Brain: You need to wash the sandpaper. Sandpaper is a thing that you hold in your hand. You are holding something in your hand. Wash it. --> Me: Sure, that sounds right.

    So in the process of trying to dry a rock I... washed it and got it wet.
    • Witnessed x 7
    • Winner x 2
  17. jacktrash

    jacktrash spherical sockbox

    crowning moment of ADHD:
    1. have 2 slices of pizza
    2. be eating slice one
    3. get distracted
    4. start eating slice two
    5. get distracted again
    6. pick up slice one
    7. be surprised and disturbed that it has bites out of it
    • Winner x 12
  18. WolffyLuna

    WolffyLuna Active Member

    Tried to retrieve laptop from crockery cupboard, was very confused when I found plates instead.
    • Like x 8
  19. TheOwlet

    TheOwlet A feathered pillow filled with salt and science

    Repeatedly tried to pour milk out of cartons that i haven't opened. Done the same with oj bottles, or salt shakers. Even if i don't need them because In Sight means i need it, apparently
    • Witnessed x 8
  20. paladinkit

    paladinkit brave little paladin

    I tried to pour melted butter down the sink instead of into the mixing bowl.
    • Witnessed x 12
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