Bad, Hilarious, Or Just Absurd Baby Names

Discussion in 'General Chatter' started by Acey, Oct 5, 2016.

  1. Sethrial MacCoill

    Sethrial MacCoill Attempts were made

    White moms need to fucking stop.
    • Like x 2
  2. Hart

    Hart the answer is no

    One of my direct ancestors was George Washington [Surname].
    • Like x 1
  3. Fucker

    Fucker Well-Known Member

    Heres some not too uncommon ones ive heard

    stig = ladde(r)
    Hauk= hawk
    Guttorm=boy worm
    Veslemøy= little girl
    Jokke= humping
    Ødegård=desolate farm (origins in the black plauge and has a sad but interesting backstory)
    Im named after a house personally
  4. Fucker

    Fucker Well-Known Member

    I also met someone online who was named jaycob, and when i said "jaycob who are you and why is your presence making me feel like a kid yelling bazinga would" bc he was pestering the group chat it kinda became a friend meme
  5. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    I met a guy named Jeff Bear (last name)
  6. Aya-non

    Aya-non Well-Known Member

    I went to school with a girl whose parents did a "V" name theme with their two kids. Hers was just an odd name--might have been archaic, or a fabricated name. Her brother's was Vash. Yes, after Vash the Stampede from Trigun. (I mean, I guess it's better than naming your white kid "Yuki" or something, but still, heavens...)
    • Like x 6
  7. thegrimsqueaker

    thegrimsqueaker 28 Moribunding Mouse Aggravates the Angry Assholes

    Usnavi actually isn't that uncommon a name. worse, there are children named Usmail for the same reason
    • Like x 3
  8. Nertbugs

    Nertbugs Information Leafblower

    As part of my job I sometimes have to go through very old documents. A lot of these are registers of names, army records, etc. The best two names I've ever come across are:

    Ms Mervielleux Wonderlich
    Ms Immaculada Concepcion

    My own name has also caused me a lot of trouble over the years. My first name is a common shortening of a longer name, and I've had countless people refuse to believe that it's not short for anything in my case. My middle name was made up by my father and sounds close enough to another common name that people refuse to believe it's spelled/pronounced the way it actually is. Sort of makes me wish that my father had gotten his way when I was born and I'd been named Quadrangle instead.
    • Like x 11
  9. Ouija

    Ouija Nani the fuck?

    One of my clients is legally named Pooh Bear. He changed it himself.

    and my personal favorite

    [10/7/2016 2:05:02 AM] Carpool Tunnel: Have u met my friends baby blaez
    [10/7/2016 2:05:12 AM] MK 47: n o
    [10/7/2016 2:05:21 AM] Carpool Tunnel: I'm never getting over how it's spelled blaez
    [10/7/2016 2:05:30 AM] MK 47: im tremblign w laughther omfg
    [10/7/2016 2:05:35 AM] MK 47: its actually spelled blaez
    [10/7/2016 2:05:35 AM] Carpool Tunnel: Juggalo
    [10/7/2016 2:05:41 AM] Carpool Tunnel: It's blaez
    [10/7/2016 2:05:52 AM] Carpool Tunnel: Fucking Mexican juggalo baby named blaez
    [10/7/2016 2:05:53 AM] MK 47: fuckf fman​
    • Like x 9
  10. unknownanonymous

    unknownanonymous i am inimitable, i am an original|18+

    blaez it
    • Like x 5
  11. Silvereye

    Silvereye 89 White Paladin Traverses The Cosmos

    I thought for years that a distant acquaintance was named Kaadit. It is not a usual name in Estonia, but my brain parses it as a name without any complaints. Then I learned that the name is actually written... very unintuitively. I don't want to give the exact spelling, because it's probably one of a kind, but let's just say that based on spelling alone I wouldn't pronounce it correctly (which is unusual, Estonian spelling is usually very sensible) and would guess that the bearer of this name is not Estonian (she is) and might be male (she is not).

    Then there are people who advocate that Proper Earthy Estonians should take care that their children's names actually mean something in Estonian and... looking at one recommended names list we have, besides common old-fashioned names and "unusual, but might be a name":
    Edukas ("successful"), Orav ("squirrel") - don't parse as names.
    Ihameel (archaic, don't know what the 13th century meaning was, but these days it parses as "mind of lust") - ...why.
    Murelik ("worried") and Tont ("ghost") - might as well curse the child and be done with it instead of actually naming them that. Like, it's one thing when your child nicknames themselves Ghost, and it's completely other thing when you go and name them Ghost. Especially because Estonia absolutely does not have the tradition of "unpleasant name to ward off evil".
    • Like x 5
  12. esotericPrognosticator

    esotericPrognosticator still really excited about kobolds tbqh

    today I encountered an alumnus of my school named Dick Tuggle. that poor, poor man...
    • Like x 17
  13. inchwyrm

    inchwyrm I wear the cheese

    My heart really goes out to any unfortunately named Richards. I know my dad used to work with a Richard Head, and also a Candy Hunt (although sadly not at the same time).

    There are also some odd name shenanigans in my recent ancestry. For one, the surname "Edhouse" which was apparently chronically mispelled as "Headhouse", "Doghouse" and even "Shithouse" among others?? Then there's my nan, whose name was "Anneada" because the person who filled out her birth certificate smooshed her first and middle names together, somehow...
    • Like x 6
  14. Socket

    Socket fuzzy tabletop goblin

    i am not exaggerating when i say i cannot stop laughing
    • Like x 6
  15. unknownanonymous

    unknownanonymous i am inimitable, i am an original|18+

    tuggle that dick
    • Like x 9
    • Winner x 1
  16. valenstyne

    valenstyne Went out for cigarettes, never came back

    I'm almost certain I've heard of children being named "Google" or "Facebook", but I hope to god that's an urban legend (I'd look it up but I fear disillusionment).

    Oh, and my mom once had a student named "Mackenzie", which is a perfectly fine name…except that her parents deliberately chose it as a reference to Spuds Mackenzie. At least they didn't go all the way and just name the kid "Bud Light".
    • Like x 4
  17. Socket

    Socket fuzzy tabletop goblin

    I can't believe I only just remembered that my friend's partner's son is called Sephiroth.
    • Like x 15
  18. LadyNighteyes

    LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

    Why would you do that to a child. What did he ever do to deserve that.
    • Like x 5
  19. Lambda

    Lambda everything happens so much

    I can't wait for a wave of tiny Vriskas and Karkats to invade the world, it's gonna be great
    • Like x 17
  20. LadyNighteyes

    LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

    I seem to recall hearing about at least one Vriska. (Which is also a "don't inflict that on a child" both for the pronunciation issues and because. Vriska is not a happy person with good parents who likes herself. This poor child does not need that mountain of baggage hanging over them and ready to fall over as soon as they discover what they're named for. :::PPP )
    • Like x 11
    • Agree x 1
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