Badfic

I am struggling to picture how everyone would have to be positioned for that to work. At least he described it more than the author responsible for the linked drawing; he said five dudes in a "pinwheel" formation and left it at that, leaving me completely confused until I mentally removed everyone's limbs so I could picture how the genitals could get that close together.

 

A bunch of people attempted to make drawings and 3D renders trying to make sense of it. One of them using only Team Fortress 2 Engineer models. Comment chain is here.

 

....how is there proof?

 

Pictures are available in the original post.

 

......................oh.
well I will never be looking into that

 

And then along the spare appendages path we get into Raketooth the Amazing Three-Armed Fox. Ten years later, I still can't help but picture the action pausing for a second as everyone just blinks and goes "huh?"

 

-imagines a fox hopping along on a singular leg because one of their legs has been retrained into another grasping appendage-

 

He was an anthropomorphic fox and was supposed to be bipedal and hand-owning. He was presumably not supposed to grab someone's head between two paws and cut the ropes on his ankles at the same time.

 

ahh gotcha

 

The Turkey City Lexicon refers to the problem there as Ing Disease: "'Putting his key in the door, he leapt up the stairs and got his revolver out of the bureau.' Alas, our hero couldn't do this even if his arms were forty feet long."

 

Brought up an idea of a Legendary Badfic tarot set in the wixcraft thread.
Fool - Little Miss Mary or some similarly dimwitted Sue.
High Priestess - Rose Potter.
Emperor - Subjugation's bodybuilder Dumbledore.
Lovers - Harry and Hermione dancing in a diner to "Always".
Wheel of Fortune - shittily-structured orgy scene.
Devil - Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way in her Satanic glory.
Tower - some character with an abnormally large dick. The ones that spring to mind are the otter apostrophe incident, Draco's which could get on Disneyland attractions by itself, the one twice the size of a bus in The Adventures of Dark Yagami, or the one in a Hetalia trollfic which was five billion miles long.
King of Wands - Cluny the Scourge ominously waving a spear and arrow.
Page of Wands - Davey Crockett of Sailor Moon: American Kitsune and his moon-shooting shotgun.
Nine of Cups - the Sue who tried to breastfeed the Fellowship.
King of Swords - Grignr. (Not technically a fanfic but he is a blatant ripoff of Conan so it counts.)
Something else of Swords - Cloud with a lawnmower.

 

THIS NEEDS TO BE A REAL THING.

 

Hey, is anyone still with the PPC? I feel we should get their opinion.

Not sure if Grignr works as King of Swords as he spends more time using a rat pelvis and an axe. Thoughts?

 

I'd bring it up on the PPC Discord but I'm not sure which bits to censor and/or ROT13.

 

@ChelG that is an excellent idea. (where would Harry (& his groinsaw) from Thirty Hs fit in?)

 

Something of Swords, I think. Two of Swords can be Ultamite Nineball's dude who dual-wielded claymores.

 

Possibly Knight of Swords, but I don't know much about tarot.

 

Someone from the PPC suggests Reicheru from Blood Raining Night as The World.

 

"Could "Justice" break the rule and be PPC?
Or "Judgment""

 

And The Star for C*l*br**n.
Edit: or The Empress.