Some of the behaviours which have caused my biggest problems interacting with people and coping in daily life seem kind of BPD-ish, according to my readings of the traits list, but I don't know if it's a possibility or if it's caused by the stuff I already know I have. I'm wondering if it's worth asking my doctor. Let me go through the list... Fear of abandonment. I tend to grovel after fucking up, both online and in real life, and also will tend to grovel to a different uninvolved person in the hopes of them patching things up for me because I feel like the other person wouldn't want to hear from me. I get very upset on the occasions I burn bridges even if it was with someone I was far from close with anyway. Unstable relationships. I do tend to idealise potential friends, and as I said get upset when people don't like me even if I didn't particularly like them. My only romantic relationship has been online, and I think it's because that way he couldn't disappoint me because he wasn't actually there. When we exchanged photos it got weird because it reminded me there was an actual person there. I've had really messed-up relationships with family members too, concluding that my mother hated me because she yelled at me, among other things. Unclear or shifting self-image. Kind of. I don't have a good grasp of anyone's personality, really, and that might be the autistic lack of empathy thing. Impulsive, self-destructive behaviors. Fighting, over-spending, over-eating, staying awake till four in the morning, occasionally drinking alcohol when I know it's going to make me feel weird (it reacts in a non-lethal manner with my antidepressants, so I feel tipsy on even a small amount) though I don't do that one often. Self-harm. I've never left marks on myself, but shitty eating and sleeping patterns, intentionally dwelling on dark thoughts, and intentionally seeking out stuff I know is going to piss me off or upset me probably come under this heading. Extreme emotional swings. Not sure I would say extreme but I definitely have weird moods. Explosive anger. Uh, 'nuff said. Yes. Feeling suspicious or out of touch with reality. Haven't really noticed this one.