Vent Colin's upset zone

"Literally 100% of my cognitive distortions are entirely objective and correct facts": local human


I did a tiny bit of my work which means i get to hate myself for not doing all of it before now and also procrastinate more

right-click on me and hit "delete" immediately, start from scratch you gotta just scrap the whole person. solid garbage. Has never done anything worthwhile lol. Is literally the only human without inherant worth, authorities amazed. local person garbage, needs to be recycled

Fire me immediately. Just literally remove me from my home and ship me to the middle of the ocean. Replace me with a swarm of bees.

Employer amazed at worker's extreme uselessness. Local idiot displays rare case of validated impostor syndrome; is literally just a pile of disposable plastic forks in the shape of an adult.

This is extremely healthy thinking and i totally shouldn't be removed from the forum for just dumping compost all over the place.

 

Local useless chunk of modern art still at work for 10 hours, has worked overtime 4 days in a row and will not ask for overtime pay because i wasn't asked to stay late it just takes me this long to stop procrastinating

Sorry for being terrible lol

I'm refusing to work on coping any bwtter than this


Maybe if i fuckin sit here for another hour my work will magically do itself! Wow! I'm angry at myself! Sorry for being an asshole


i want to throw my phone at the window but i'm not going to because i would get fired, arrested and lose my phone

 

All the shit is done except i decided the last thing could get away with 2/3 instead. Fuck everything and also someone please punch me 1900 times thanks

 

I ~guess i should actually be nice to myself for accomplishing things

>:(((((((((((

I need to find the version of this pic where it's like "me trying to apply what my therapist taught me" because that is extremely me:


(Except by this point Pingu would have wrecked at least some of whats in front of him out of sheer spite)


Also for fun, the snapchat-appropriate version of this breakdown, from like 5 hours ago

Spoiler: Snop

jdjds i didnt mean to frame my eye so Dramatically

In conclusion im just karkat yelling at past and future versions of himself

 

Im upset and i dont have a valid reason to be angry. I just fucked up my stupid cbt app and i want to give up and delete it but that would be quitting and id regret it at least a bit

But like i said in the freezer thread, i dont know how to fix it so i guess ill just pretend it never asked me about the stupid fucking sleep thing

Like fuck you i am not buying 3 alarm clocks and putting my devices outside my room. Im gonna fuckin ddestroy my body with lack of sleep and ill just murder my sleep schedule! Fuck off! Im objectively garbage and nothing is worth trying

Just fucking fire me already

Hey fucko maybe you should stop bashing your head against the cognitive bullshit?????? Just fucking delete it and dont look back until youre ready to stop being a shitlord who refuses to consider changing. I hate myself and i want to be destroyed immediately. I'll regret it but itll be for the better if someone just guillotines me immediately so i can escape all my responsibilities.

 

How the fuck do you calm down

Being angry just goes on forever until you get tired of being angry

 

Yelling mountain goats songs: sort of effective

Everything still sucks and i refuse to be objective or look at my distorted thinking

I need to put in a new insulin cartridge i guess. I mean i dont deserve it but i fucking guess.

Edit: note to self: you are not being cute so how about you stop slowly filling up seebs' server with garbage self harm posting. You cant actually opt out of needing insulin, you literal piece of garbage. Fuck you, do your actual fucking life sustaining medical shit amd then you can go back to hating yourself

 

This is a garbage fire thread and i'm sorry if you had the misfortune of reading any of it

 

I uninstalled the fucking app again and i'm not reinstalling it this time. Its a bad fit

 

Local human learns one (1) coping skill since age 11: consider removing yourself and or the thing thats pissing you off

wow

 

somersaults across the landscape like link in a speedrun

I have a counsellor appt on thursday so i guess i should discuss the Big Grump Moods

 

heyyyy got a big lecture from my landlady about how my apartment is gross and disgusting and messy! Thanks i already know!

who wants to come personally murder me so i can escape all responsibilities

 

time to angrily wash dishes while crying and blasting music in my headphones!

I'm upset lol

 

I'm upset!!!!!!!!!!!

I have to do my fucking laundry and i'm really angry!

 

laundry is in the washer and i probably overfilled it with blankets so now it's squeaking against the side of the drum every time it spins but who cares

Fuck laundry

 

half of the blankets are spinning again to get the water out and the other half are drying. Sorted the recycling under/in front of the sink, plus whatever i came across on the table and my room. Definitely not all of it but fuck recycling

a n g e r y

 

i did not do dishes but i swept and halfassedly mopped with the swiffer wipe thing

If im still awake when the floor dries i have to put the mats back and take the recycling out

less angery and more tired. I have to clear off the couch and finish clearing the table and i guess wash my fuckton of clothes

 

hey hey don't burn yourself out on the cleaning, you don't have to do everything at once. it's completely reasonable to take your time and conserve some energy for self care.

anyway I hope this doesn't come off condescending but good job on getting stuff done

 

Im definitely not continuing tonight because its now 335am

Thanks for real, its important to acknowledge the doing of thing even tho i didnt do All Possible Tasks Ever Retroactively

 

I'm getting burned out at my job and i am making really slow progress on this stupid thing i'm writing. I stayed at work for a total of about 16 or 18 hours on sunday because i kept avoiding my work that had to be done for the next day.

I feel like im in a cycle where im getting less productive and work is going to get annoyed with me. I dont like the idea of admitting to my boss that i'm having trouble, even though i dont think he would react badly