on my quest to do more poses w/ my fancytier designs as well as try to psych up to finish the missing designs/revamp the oldest ones.
@Takoto Isn't that the ONLY valid time to make OCs? I like his clawwwwwzzzzz. :3 So anyway hi everyone, I don't think I've posted in here before now so lemme give you the short version of my story: Spent better part of my latter 20's freelancing and teaching as a professional artist. Spent same time becoming an increasingly-unstable alcoholic. Landed in psych ward October 2014. At this point two important things happened: 1. Got diagnosed with OCD on top of other existing acronyms I already knew about, got medicated for it, aaaaand.... haven't done anything to deal with that since, because sobriety and other health issues were more urgent. 2. My art.... changed. I've only been able to do three drawings in all that time, whereas I was formerly an illustrator. The tradeoff is every so often, my brain will go "HEY we need to work with [medium I have literally never used ever]." And so I do that. So I've been screwing around with my new spontaneously awakened skills in stuff like Sculpey and elaborate collages, but I really really WANT to be able to draw again. I miss it. It was my THING, maaaan~~ Okay so I've finally started working through dealing with my OCD , and one thing that's made that possible is Lizardbrain. Lizardbrain is the part of my brain that behaves like a primordial reptile. Lizardbrain is made of manic chaos energy and he's fucking stupid and driven by aggressive instinct for survival and an inexplicable desire to cause me all manner of malicious harm.... cuz he's so fucking stupid I register to his consciousness like a dog's own tail that he has to GET IT HUNT IT DOWN NOW KILL IT. Basically, I turned my mental disorders into their own entity so I have a way to communicate with it directly. So last night I... I really wanted to make something to show people what he actually is in my head. It took LITERALLY ALL NIGHT and hours and hours of googling and cursing the anatomy of these stupid animals, but I think it actually HELPED that I've never tried to draw a lizard before now. Usually when I try to draw, I REMEMBER what it felt like and how I did it and I want to just slide back into that familiar dance. Lizardbrain showed me his skeleton and laughed at my suffering through a mouthful of his own spleen or something. I had to learn from scratch how to arrange this animal's bits. But guys... I DID IT~~~~!!!!! And now I am taking a break for lunch then we're gonna find out if I can make my hands remember how colored pencils work, too! ^___^
