Fic quotes for the soul

ChelG · Apr 9, 2018 at 8:40 AM

“Nope. Looks like something pretty bad happened here, though. On the bright side, I always wondered what would happen if Salvador Dali and Hunter S. Thompson became Elder Gods.”

“Really?”

“No.”
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TW gore

Loq · Apr 11, 2018 at 2:13 PM

"I can't stop you," Jodah said, coldly, and walked away.

Standing nearby, Liliana said with an eye-roll, "Oh, he disapproves." Then she added to Gideon, "I will not shut up. And stop elbowing me, it's like being bumped by a mammoth."
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Loq · Apr 12, 2018 at 6:19 PM

It's not that she ever forgets James' strength is enhanced; it's just that he rarely does anything to remind her, preferring to hang back in the shadows. Seeing him jump lightly down from the roof with a white-painted cast iron bench slung casually over one shoulder is certainly a reminder. She watches wide-eyed as he shifts the high-backed bench into both hands like it weighs nothing, setting it down not far from the door.

She has no idea what he's doing with a bench in the first place.
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Loq · Apr 19, 2018

Sam would be a little worried about hitting that place without ten guys with AK-47s, except Steve kind of is ten guys with AK-47s, conveniently packaged in one massive highly portable white dude.
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So yeah, he’s got coping mechanisms. He’s chock full of them. He’s got so many coping mechanisms they’re coming out his fucking ears, because without them he’d probably have the operational efficiency of a house plant. Sure, some of this coping involves dismembering former HYDRA agents with their own cooking shears in their nice floral kitchen, but Barnes-thing doesn’t judge. Being negative towards yourself is a bad brain habit that impedes meaningful change and healthy recovery.
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The resulting clearheadedness is enough to clue him in that something changed, and some half-assed detective work on his own goddamn life brings him to the groundbreaking conclusion of eat more, you fucking trainwreck zombie disaster.
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“Was that an alien or just a gringo?” one of them asks a few moments later, watching the ship wobble around for a solid minute this time before disappearing.

“I don’t know,” the other one says. “But either way I’m pretty sure he was hungover.”

“Maybe still drunk. Definitely not all the way sober.” The guy nods slowly, still staring at the space where the ship disappeared. “Marcos, are we all the way sober?”

“If we are, let’s not stay that way for long,” Marcos says. “If he’s an alien here to enslave humanity starting with the nearest town, we’re the idiots that pointed him right to it.”
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Then he spends a solid five minutes just thinking things like stay on the fucking ground and do not float away I really mean it and dirt, dirt, hurrah for dirt, we love dirt until he feels there’s a slight chance the ship won’t start bobbing in the breeze the second he steps away from it.
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ChelG · Apr 19, 2018 at 8:23 PM

TT: Today marks your 600th death threat to me and 2,321th death threat to her.
UU: STOP KEEPING TRACK OF THAT
TT: Or you’ll kill me?
UU: YES!!
TT: 601.
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ChelG · Apr 19, 2018 at 8:45 PM

"NO! NO! THE HORNS AND BLOODY WINGS WERE ENOUGH AND THE BLEEDING TELEPORTING WHY DO THE BUGGERING BEAMS HAVE TO COME BACK?!"
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Loq · Apr 21, 2018 at 5:18 PM

Barnes’ brain examines this and realizes it has no choice but to categorically reject all the word noises coming out of Steve’s mouth. “I am gonna give Wilson a big stick,” he says furiously. “And every time you even look like you’re having a stupid thought he’s gonna hit you with it. Hard. And then you will say, thank you Wilson, for enforcing the law of Bucky, and thank you Bucky, for enforcing the law of god. You imbecile. And I thought I had brain damage!”
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ChelG · Apr 23, 2018 at 9:26 AM

Things always seem like a good idea at the time, and then- that second in college right before he had called his professor an idiot, the freeze-frame before telling his at-the-time girlfriend that yes the jeans did make her look kinda chubby, the moment before he plugged his brain into a lump of kaiju calimari- his brain will suddenly shout, WAIT, NO-. But he never waits, and he always does whatever the ill-advised thing is anyway, and it's that kind of risk taking that simultaneously got him beat up a lot when he was in his teens and made him one of the world's leading kaiju specialists.
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-NSFW

keltena · Apr 23, 2018 at 11:38 AM

“Wow!” Blake looked up from his drawing for a moment to comment. “I cannot shinjiru that Reiji-kun is kuso'ing dead!”
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/11965917

ChelG · Apr 30, 2018 at 4:05 PM

As far as he could tell, the creature that had only recently awakened from a decades-long slumber beneath the earth of the abandoned town was some kind of dog in the same way that Mystery was some kind of dog – namely, it really wasn't when you got down to it. The thing had two heads, was the size of your average woolly mammoth, and was absolutely bristling with snakes.

(A cerberus, Mystery had called it. Wasn't there only supposed to be one Cerberus? Arthur had asked. Well yes, technically, Mystery had said, but it's a giant demonic dog from the Underworld and it has more than one head and there are snakes attached to it, so no matter what I say, you're going to look at it and think Cerberus, so we might as well just call it that.)
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/6800782

ChelG · May 6, 2018 at 1:47 PM

VALJEAN: A couronne, or crown, is a traditional French loaf normally served at Christmas time. While this is a very traditional loaf, we’re still looking for innovative flavors and fantastic decorations to differentiate these loaves.

[CAMERA: Cut to COSETTE, outside the tent.]

COSETTE: We hope some of the bakers will be very ambitious, and I just hope that the personality of the bakers will come through with what they’re making.

[CAMERA: Cut to inside the tent, where the BAKERS are hastily getting to work mixing ingredients for their doughs, with the exception of ENJOLRAS, who is standing behind his station and conspicuously not doing anything.]

GRANTAIRE: What are you doing?

ENJOLRAS: Nothing.

GRANTAIRE: No shi—I mean, no kidding, Sherlock. But why are you doing nothing? What are you waiting for?

ENJOLRAS: I’m protesting the very idea of this bake.

[GRANTAIRE stops mid-kneading and stares at ENJOLRAS.]

GRANTAIRE: Are you out of your damn mind?

ENJOLRAS: I won’t participate in a bake that seeks to uphold the legitimacy of the monarchy and its continued legacy of oppression, colonialism and more.

GRANTAIRE: You dunce, this bake has nothing to do with the monarchy or the legitimacy of…whatever.

[ENJOLRAS crosses his arms in front of his chest.]

ENJOLRAS: I’m still not participating. It’s a symbol.

GRANTAIRE: Yeah, a symbol of your stupidity.

[ENJOLRAS’S jaw tightens and he says nothing. GRANTAIRE sighs and steps around his station to walk over to ENJOLRAS. His voice is softer, persuasive as he talks to ENJOLRAS.]

GRANTAIRE: If you’d stop being an idiot for a minute, you’d realize that this is an opportunity for education and reaching people much more so than some pointless protest. Make the bake itself into a symbol against the monarchy.

[Despite himself, ENJOLRAS is reluctantly intrigued.]

ENJOLRAS: What do you mean?

GRANTAIRE: I mean, I don’t know, decorate it with guillotines and bread portraits of Trotsky. Whatever. But don’t get yourself thrown out of the Bake Off just for refusing to bake a damn loaf of bread.
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http://kjack89.tumblr.com/post/153502968437/the-great-misérables-bake-off-pt-2-2500

garden · May 7, 2018 at 12:31 AM

Goblins viewed theft as worse than murder, their rationale being you could only be killed once but you could be robbed many times.
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-Six Pomegranate Seeds

ChelG · May 7, 2018 at 3:34 PM

"Look at all the successful black people out there now. Look at Clyde Livingston! No reason at all that you can't be just like him."

"That's a load of bull," said X-Ray, while some of the others nodded. "Ev'ry so often, yeah, someone does make it, and the white guys are all, ooh, why can't you be more like him? Well you don't say to no white boys, yeah, you've gotta be the next Shakespeare or Mozart or Vincent van fucking Gogh, they're already up there, cos they're white, man."

Mr Pendanski was forced to concede his point, but he was quietly furious about it.
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/433674

Jean · May 10, 2018 at 12:08 PM

The noise suddenly changes pitch.

Len drops the tablet, his hands flying to his ears – god, it’s so loud, his body had adjusted so he'd almost managed to forget how loud the sound was; it’s like being on a jet plane, it’s like being near a jackhammer, it hurts, it’s so loud, the noise – no, the singing, it’s goddamn singing, the singing is so loud –

That’s when it comes through the closed first set of bulkhead doors, coming right from where the hull was breached and Len’s air is draining out into the vacuum of empty space.

Len can’t call it anything but it.

It’s not human, whatever it is; Len’s never seen anything like it before.

It is – it’s undefinable, that’s what it is. It’s something like a wheel, something like a person, sexless, something like neither of them at all. Every inch of it is glowing, gleaming so bright, so white, that Len desperately wants to look away but can’t, a white like gleaming marble, like fresh snow, like a blank page, but a white so bright that it shines into his eyes like he’s looking straight into an exploding firework, like a thousand explosions all at once, those recordings he’s seen of the fall of the atom bomb, white-white-white, all around. The aura of that light is so bright that it rips holes into the darks of Len’s eyes, leaving shadows, speckling it with what looks in Len’s confused mind like a human eye, covering it with those eyes, eyes more than anything else; hundreds of eyes, thousands of eyes, blue eyes, blue as a summer day’s sky, eyes on every surface of it, on every wheel spoke, every arm, on every feather of the wings made of blazing white flame –

Len falls to his knees.

His eyes are running, wet in agony, his hands are clenched on his ears, his heart is beating triple-time –

And then it speaks, it speaks in the same horrible beautiful tone, infinitely high, infinitely low, a ringing bell so loud, so impossible loud, that sound that feels like it’s ripping Len apart –

It speaks -

And it says –

“Be not afraid.”
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Countless Roads by nirejseki, aka: that one where Len Snart sees ghosts, and angels are the ghosts of stars.

ChelG · May 10, 2018 at 7:41 PM

"Looks like Legolas has just asked the guards — sorry, the gards to keep an eye on Laura's room while the orcs are kidnapping her, and... it all gets a bit confused."
"So the gard walks into the room and sees the orcs, and does nothing. Legolas runs off down the hall, then runs back and asks the gards where Laura is. They say that the orcs took her, neglecting to mention that they stood by and watched..."
"And by that time, the orcs have apparently already returned to Mordor. I think we can safely assume that all the characters have gone insane."
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keltena · May 13, 2018 at 8:28 AM

“I have no freakin' clue, man!” Monokuma said, desperation in his voice. “Why does the mastermind want anything? Why does the mastermind prefer their coffee black? Why does the mastermind prefer red gloves so strongly to other colors, say, black, or white? Why did it take, like, an hour for me to convince the mastermind to let me give Kazuya a male-coded Handbook?”

“Wait, seriously?” Rin frowned, but it was a frown of more confusion than anything. “Why in the world?”

Monokuma squished his own face in and started doing an exaggerated 'stupid strawman' voice. “Nyehhh, 'what if it comes up during a muuuurderrrr? It could be a cooooool plot twiiiiiist!' Listen, first off, basic conscientiousness should take precedence over 'cool plot twists,' and second, do you know what happened last time something like that happened? You'd get people arguing for years about whether Kazuya was trans or just crossdressing! Look what happened to Chihiro Fujisaki! Is that what you want?”

“What do you mean, 'what happened to Chihiro Fujisaki?'” Jun said. “It's historically provable that—”

“For god's sake, man, don't speak the Forbidden Pronouns!” Monokuma cried, shouting over Jun's halted sentence. “Do you want to bring down the wrath of half of https://www.123.yamada.net on us?! I mean, I know you like to troll online and write bad reviews for fanfiction you've never even read just because you object on a basic level to their ships, Jun, but seriously!”
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(yet more of this)

Loq · May 16, 2018 at 1:38 PM

"Oh, right, this is a thallid. Hi there, thallid."

Slimefoot freed a third armstalk to wave a greeting.

"That's helpful, Raff," Tiana said. Her tone suggested that it was not at all helpful. "What is it doing here?"

"Well, thallids are from Yavimaya, and are sort of related to mushrooms," Raff explained. "They were originally created as a... Uh, I'll tell you later. It's a little awkward to get into all that with it standing there. This one probably came aboard as a spore, stuck to that tree elemental seed Jhoira used to regrow the hull. Oh, hey, and it's had like ten babies already."

"WHAT?" Tiana said.

Slimefoot looked around at its sprouts, all in the stalk phase now. It prompted them, and they all waved at their new friends.

"Yeah, those are little thallids. Hi, little thallids," Raff said. He turned to Tiana. "What are you going to do about it?"

Tiana didn't answer, but sighed deeply. Slimefoot wasn't sure how to interpret that.
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ChelG · May 20, 2018 at 3:20 PM

Daytime sleep didn’t sit well with him, though. John found that it was rather like bad sex: it wasn’t satisfying, no matter how long you went at it, but because you were horribly stuck somewhere between sated and unsated, you wanted more of it just in case it got better over time (it didn’t).
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/890664/chapters/1718416

ChelG · May 22, 2018 at 8:47 AM

This actually looks like a really smart way to give a kid the consent talk. (The kid in this was not directly harmed, he's crying because he saw a triggering video.)

"Listen," Bucky tries. "You can do a thing in a nice way or a mean way, right? When I hug you, or when Dad or Sam hugs you--like when they get home from being away, you like that, right? You run right up to us and you want a hug?"

"But that's not--they were--"

"Shh, shh," Bucky says, dropping his hands to Teddy's shoulders.

"Just listen a minute. Do you like it when you run up to me for a hug and I hug you? Today, right, I walked in and you were scared and you wanted me, and I gave you a hug, and I held you, and that was what you wanted, right?"

Teddy sniffs and nods. As if reminded, he snuggles in against Bucky's chest, wrapping his right arm around Bucky's left shoulder. He works his hand up the sleeve of Bucky's t-shirt to tuck his fingers against the seam where metal meets flesh, the familiar old position. Bucky kisses the top of his head again and rubs his back.

"And if Dad or Sam had been here instead, it would have been the same, wouldn't it? You would want them to hug you, and they would, and that would be good."

Teddy nods slowly against Bucky's chest.

"But you didn't want Mrs. Edwards to hug you, did you?"

Teddy picks his head up enough to shake it hard, his fingers hooking tighter against Bucky's scars. Bucky doesn't bother to tell him to be gentle like Steve always does when he sees Teddy doing that; it really doesn't hurt.

"Right," Bucky says. "So Mrs. Edwards didn't hug you, because she understood that you didn't want her to. But if some stranger put their arms around you and held you still--that would be the same action as a hug, right? Arms around you, holding on. But it would be bad and mean, because you wouldn't want them to, and you would probably try to get away from them, and if they really held on they would probably hurt you."
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-TW discussion of noncon, obviously

shmeed · May 22, 2018 at 8:59 PM

The level of stupidity here has fallen down the stairs, and continuously flipped ass over heels down the spiral monstrosity, tumbling into a bottomless pit of dumb. There are so many things wrong with that statement that you don’t even know where to start, you could perform a fifteen hour autopsy on that statement and still fail to diagnose the cause of death.
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link (story is explicit)

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Fic quotes for the soul

ChelG Well-Known Member

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

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Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

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keltena putting the fun in executive dysfunction

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garden lucid dreamer

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Jean Let’s stop procrastinating -- tomorrow!

ChelG Well-Known Member

keltena putting the fun in executive dysfunction

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

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shmeed plant me

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Fic quotes for the soul

ChelG Well-Known Member

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

ChelG Well-Known Member

ChelG Well-Known Member

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

ChelG Well-Known Member

keltena putting the fun in executive dysfunction

ChelG Well-Known Member

ChelG Well-Known Member

garden lucid dreamer

ChelG Well-Known Member

Jean Let’s stop procrastinating -- tomorrow!

ChelG Well-Known Member

keltena putting the fun in executive dysfunction

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

ChelG Well-Known Member

ChelG Well-Known Member

shmeed plant me

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