Fic That Needs To Exist

(For the record, the Wright Anything Agency is asked to defend the director of the new Steel Samurai film, provisionally named Dirk Rector, after a critic was murdered during the premiere screening of the movie. Rector is a controversial director with a few critical darlings under his belt, but his last few movies have tanked horribly and been savaged by critics, and this one is a laughingstock even before its release and the murdered critic made no secret that he was fully expecting to savage it. Edgeworth is prosecuting and very badly failing to conceal how pissy he is about what the movie did to everyone's characterizations, no that's definitely not why he decided to prosecute this one himself, shut up. Apollo is defending and knows n o t h i n g about Steel Samurai lore, assisted by Trucy, who knows e v e r y t h i n g about Steel Samurai lore because of years of family movie nights with Edgeworth and Maya. There is a red-herring investigative trail where the defense team discovers Gumshoe was at the theater undercover during the incident, and they get him to admit it because the face-concealing suit he was in was of a character who did something stupid in the background of a shot that made it into the trailer and got relentlessly memed on and used to preemptively trash the movie, so that actor would never have actually been invited to the premiere. This later becomes a plot point when Apollo uses the undercover police presence to prove that there was something going down in the theater that night besides the movie premiere, so there could be other motives than a personal grudge related to the production and critical reception of Rector's movies. The CinemaSins expy is named Nate Pickering and he keeps counting sins for random things everyone says and does and rapidly drives everyone else in the courtroom crazy. He's a witness because the critics were all in the same block of seats during the screening, and at some point when Apollo catches him in a lie he declares it an "Objection ex machina.")

 

I have a somewhat soft spot for Loki/Tony but I want a Loki/Tony where it's basically "welcome to the polycule" because Tony meets Angrboda and also Sigyn. (Both tend to get pushed off to the side, which seems to be Marvel canon. But. I'm a half-assed Lokean.)

 

Just in general, more small fandom fan fic needs to exist. >_>; You go to AO3 with hope in your heart and at best you might find 100 fics. Or fewer. (At the moment I am mostly thinking about Chrono Crusade because it continues to be a minor obsession even though I haven't read or written any fan fic for it in years.)

 

I am still somewhat cranky about a time travel book called The Alexandria Inheritance which is part of a series adjacent to Eric Flint's 163x series. In this case a vacation liner ends up in the time just after the death of Alexander the Great. Authors including flint tend to suck at writing disabled characters for this series. (Flint in general seems to suck at this.) They made Alexander's half brother Phillip on the autistic spectrum and wrote him very, very badly when they wrote him at all. (They mostly did the thing where other characters had thoughts about him, instead of him having a pov. Also they did a thing where he was compared to his toddler nephew which kind of pissed me off.) He was also very stereotypically "a math genius and of course he understands computers."

On the other hand there was some indication that at least his wife didn't think he was an idiot. (Or at least she said that he wasn't. I would have like more interactions between them, and conversations. It was mostly tell.) They could have fixed a lot of the problems if they'd bothered to have Phillip be a character instead of an obstacle, which they did not do.

So, I want Eurydice (the wife) and Phillip cuteness. I want an autistic spectrum OC helping Phillip navigate the ships net and other stuff. I want Eurydice and Phillip writing to each other while in the same damn room. Possibly with their feet touching because they're also on the same couch. (Phillip is touch averse.) I also want Phillip to (with some help) decide his nephew is not having any contact with his grandmother (much to the relief of his sister in law who is having troubles explaining to boyfriend that the reason she hates her mother in law is not just the the punchline of a mother in law joke.)

 

I never knew how much I wanted a Twilight daemon AU until 5 minutes ago when I learned that none exists. why do I want this? I’m not even invested in Twilight at all but now my soul will never know peace because no one’s written about Edward’s desperate struggle to keep his daemon from flopping on top of Bella’s and purring like a diesel engine immediately the first time they meet

 

just gonna

 

The context was actually Prokopetz in a tabletop game rec post (asking for recs for non-grimdark magical girls):

 

What I want to see: A self-insert falls into [anime of choice]. A classic. The twist? Self Insert spends the entire story trying to figure out if they're in the anime, the second anime, the manga, the ova, the live action series, the stage musical, etc. Because they're all basically the same premise but there are some very important details about, for example, who is or isn't a villain in each version of canon and the SI needs to know this before going forth. I just like the idea of someone with a flowchart of twelve or so versions of canon, crossing them out as assorted hijinks occur.

Comedy answer: Self-insert-chan is in one of the anime, but, like, a really weird dub.

 

That would be doubly hilarious with Dragon Ball since Dragon Ball is, itself, an amazingly off-the-rails Journey to the West adaptation

 

My initial thought was Fullmetal Alchemist, because the two anime diverge hard and picking the wrong canon might actually get you killed. Then I thought 'okay but how many versions of Sailor Moon are there?' (at least five) and then there's shit like how 90's English dubs would just alter the plot (they arent gay, he's a girl! They aren't lesbians they're cousins, also everything that happened to poor One Piece) and also Robotech. (for the uninformed, Robotech is three completely unrelated anime series that got mooshed into a single 85 episode dub. its a trip)

 

Dreaming of Sunshine has something like this as a ...meta-plot? The character has only seen the anime, but the author draws on other canons, and multiple times the character is like "I didn't see this coming because it wasn't in the show" at points where the audience is intended to know that it's from, say, one of the movies.

Fandom is amazing.

Other things about Dreaming of Sunshine:

- truly glorious bureaucratic intrigue, esp in later chapters
- other metatext handled subtly and with realism
- gut-wrenchingly accurate depictions of depression and moral injury
- also child soldiers
- actually a v happy and optimistic fic
- so many ninja shenanigan. so many
- cannot overstate the bureaucratic intrigue I was literally screaming at points
- initially published in 2011; last updated in 2019
- almost forgot to mention that it's 700k words over 150 chapters
- has an entire fandom of its own with like a forum and everything
- after the first chapter, it's arguably a more traditional narrative than its source canon
- it is..... such a slow fic. the slowest.
- I'm lov it

 

tma gripe: i want a good peter lukas <3< elias fic, but all of the ones i've read have been either fluffy or sad and unhealthy <3, and both of those are great and all but where's the hatefucking, magnus archive fandom, answer me

 

i require a comic that is just the stinky bastard man cat meme thing but with yoruichi, soifon, and urahara. just urahara manhandling an exasperated kitty yoru while soifon cries NOOOOOOOOO.

 

this fic that i keep stalling out on needs to exist :/

 

Idea for a Stanley/Zero fic based on The Six Swans, except Stanley has to dig up the whole lake to free the transformed Green Lake boys. Transformed into what, though? Yellow-spotted lizards?

ETA: Actually, would Zero work better as the POV character?

 

100k slowburn epic master chief/arbiter halo fanfiction with detailed worldbuilding about sangheili courting customs, please god someone else write it so that i don't have to

 

I misread that as "Master Chef" and I was like, "I don't understand but I support you."

 

I don’t know a single thing about halo other than the few bits I’ve picked up from the RvB fandom, and I still want to read that fic

 

Spoilers for Castlevania season 3

Spoiler: mentions of animal cruelty and canon typical shit

Has Lenore ever had a real pet before? Even if she has, I think nobody in the entire show could possibly know more about pets than Hector. Or maybe more importantly, the circumstances under which cruel people abuse and kill pets.

Lenore has pinned a lot of her reputation on Hector. Not just his utility, his health and wellbeing. He could embarrass her just by failing to thrive, let alone successfully provoking her. Embarrassment is no small thing for a diplomat.

She’s already let him know that she believes she’s working at a disadvantage when it comes to respect because she is a diplomat, and that it’s a sore spot. I don’t know if she realizes how much she gave away by bringing up the topic herself and then overreacting violently to it. If she really felt secure in her strength, she could have shrugged him off and chuckled instead of beating up an injured, exhausted, malnourished, desperate human in a cage. That was amazingly pathetic, and it’s a type of pathetic that’s unmissably similar to what some humans do to animals.

She seems like she needs something that she believes she can get from keeping Hector. Her sisters have definitely noticed and are already rolling their eyes. It sounds like this may have happened before. Whatever she wants, it’s not something as simple as sex or power. I don’t think her talk about running away together was all lies. I think it was convincing because it wasn’t. She’s a diplomat, she lies with the truth.

I would very much like to see a story where Lenore realizes that even though she planned for this to be an extended mind game going in, she wasn’t actually prepared for the reality of using a man who remains stubbornly convinced he has nothing left to lose as the visible element of a personal power play. Especially since he has a nearly irreplaceable skill, so she can’t just dispose of him and forget it ever happened. It’s a war of attrition on all fronts.