Goofus tries to dye his skin in a bathtub of gray sharpie and now everything is ruined forever. Gallant always brings snacks or beverages to parties
Goofus got Homestuck cosplayers banned from three cons. Gallant always puts the toilet seat back down. Ninja'd Goofus shouts about doritos and mountain dew but doesn't even listen to your answers.
goofus takes a bag to parties and fills it with food from the host's fridge gallant always puts things back where he found them after borrowing something from someone edit: ninja'd oops
Goofus isn't allowed to pet sit after what happened last time. Gallant gives old ladies his seat on the bus.
Goofus takes up as many of the disabled seats as possible and also blocks the aisle. Gallant sends kind and helpful anon messages to people on Tumblr who are having a rough time.
Goofus Straight White Boy TM Texts Inboxes people constantly. Gallant wears headphones when he listens to music after hours when his roommate is sleeping.
goofus plays HEYYEAYEAHA 10 hours on full blast every night gallant always makes sure to tip when appropriate in restaurants
Goofus shoves birdseed and tallow suet into his mouth and then flails at any birds that try to eat his horrible mouth fulla birdfood Gallant replies to time sensitive emails/texts/voicemails as soon as he can
goofus automatically deletes any emails/texts/voicemails that look "boring" and says he never got them gallant never takes more than his share when splitting a pizza
Goofus eats as much pizza as he can and then sets the rest on fire because if he isn't going to have it, no one else can. Gallant always cleans up the lab after he finishes his experiment
goofus complains loudly about you probably expecting him to buy you something when someone else wishes you happy birthday gallant takes the shopping cart back to the shopping cart area when he's done with it
goofus acts like he's going to make you a sandwich, but makes and eats a sandwich in front of you instead while simultaneously using the last of the bread gallant pulls over and helps people change their tire when he can
Goofus deliberately knifes your tires while you're in the store and then drives away. Gallant offers to bring you groceries when you can't get them yourself.
goofus scams you out of money for groceries and spends it all on 20 cases of root beer that he pours down the drain gallant compliments you on your new haircut
Goofus drove past the Barnes & Noble shouting "SNAPE KILLS DUMBLEDORE" for the lulz. Gallant takes out the trash when it's full.
