Idioms, slang, memes, and weird turns of phrase

I don't think I've ever heard it in a "natural" environment, just in fiction/shows/comics.

 

Oh man, how did I never see this thread??

Most of my family's are either fannish references (some very outdated, my dad has a distressing tendency to quote GIR), but some are weird family turns of phrase? That or things from shitposts and memes.

• "Their hands are HUUUUGE!" -From Futurama. Means "they're high as fuck."
• "The tubes are clogged" -You know that "the internet is a series of tubes" meme from like ten years ago? This stems from that; our internet used to be really shitty and went down frequently, and I once said this as a joke to indicate that the internet was down. It stuck. We still use it.
• We have others but I'm blanking?

And several friend groups I'm in have weird in-jokes and memes."agre" instead of "agree" (due to a typo)

• "GAINT not smol" (to indicate that a thing is large in size)
• "DO NOT!!!!FUCK!!!!THE (X)!!!!!!!!" (in response to someone announcing their desire to fuck someone or something, which comes up a lot more than it reasonably should probably)
  
• I feel like "screan" kinda counts as an injoke in a way? @cassikat what are ur thoughts
• Uh, most TMBG shitposting is basically just injokes amongst a bunch of my friends and myself. We have a blog for them. Examples include:
  • John Linnell being a reptilian/lizard man/snerson who subjects poor unfortunate souls to "lizarding" in order to write kickass yet incomprehensible songs.
  • Danny Weinkauf's sleep obsession.
  • Talking about Linnell's LONG. THIN. FINGERS.
  • Marty Beller being a soulful gopher, and playing the drums to complete the band.
  • John Flansburgh's cats.
  • The fact that Flans and Robin Goldwasser are stoners.

 

...I guess "hypothetical five-year-olds" for my old bulletin board friend group is probably thread-worthy. @blue , y/n?

 

Oh, and some between me and @Kishona:

• "He got his face ripped off, like in that movie Face/Off." Alternately, "Face/Off, where the guy gets his face ripped off."
• "CAAAAAAAAAAN DOOOOOOO! I'M MR. MEESEEKS!" in response to a request or well-wish.
• The aforementioned "GAINT not smol."
• "jfk" in place of "jfc."
• borger

Spoiler: lolicon mention sorta?

Also, referring to Aquamarine as the Evil Gem Loli.

 

My dad and I speak our own language pretty much. It's hard to remember what we use because it's automatic; I've had 25 years of building it up.

• BBTs, or a "case of the BBTs" (short for Bitch Be Trippin') when someone's either outright hallucinating or feeling mentally a little off. "I think I saw the cat but I might have the BBTs"
• Downloading the entire internet. We have very good internet, so if one person's slowing it down for everyone what the fuck are you doing, downloading the entire internet?
• Scaring my demons, mostly a joking phrase. "You're awake this early? Quit scaring my demons!"
• Standing in the stupid, came from video games. Either AOE or environmental hazards- don't stand in the stupid. Came to refer to household stuff- the dishwasher sometimes puddles when you open it and nobody cleans it up so if someone stepped in it a conversation might go "ugh, my feet are wet" "Don't stand in the stupid!" or "I can't get a mug without standing in the stupid"
• The fart vault/locked/trapped in the fart vault came from a boss from Diablo III. The door locks for the fight and the boss has poison clouds, and more than once the game has glitched and failed to unlock the door once dad beat the boss. Dad has the most awful farts, so his room became the fart vault (which he referred to the boss room as), and since the dog usually stayed there and was sometimes forgotten about sometimes the dog was locked in the fart vault. Or anything that traps stink inside is a fart vault if it has a door. When there was a skunk the garage was the fart vault for a minute.
• Squishy in a hard shell is juicer slang from Rifts and refers to a non-augmented person wearing power armor, but it came to mean someone who's got a tough exterior but is actually kind. The angry punk who's kind to kids and animals is a squishy in a hard shell.
• Bitchcakes, or baking bitchcakes, for snapping at people without cause. "Avoid him, he's bitchcakes" or "I see you're baking bitchcakes, I'm out"
• "Because that's what heroes do" in our best Handsome Jack impression. From an a line from an ECHO found in Borderlands 2 ("We tortured her for hoooouurs. But we let her live. Because that's what heroes do.") that was so gloriously absurd it became meme. Gets appended to all kinds of things where it's wildly inappropriate. "The baby stole my Bastet off my altar again." "Because that's what heroes do" "Had a panic attack in Costco, because that's what heroes do." I used it in the WT discord and they've picked it up.
• Also intentional swapping of homophones. Poup for poop is the most common. Intentional misspellings as well, because we both have bad hands and typo a lot so fuck it. We also replace sounds with similar sounds, "ax" being the most common because dad went by a username that was shortened to Ax quite often. Axidentally, axeptable, so on. Ex is often changed to "hex" or "vex" depending on context. My mom is (affectionately) known as dad's vex-wife. Something might be hexellent, a place might have an emergency vexit (especially if you keep getting confused by it).
• Demonic cow jokes. This is a longer story, and starts with the Itty Bitty Woman in a Big Red Truck. Grandma Cathy (or Kathy?) was a little old lady trucker who helped my parents out a lot when I was a tiny. She had to attend some kind of meeting thing and one of the other trucker ladies made what's more commonly known as 'quiet coyote' with her hand but will always be Satanicow for us, and said "Satanicow says: kill the coworkers. MOO." This story was shared and became a minor meme that survived the years. It combined, eventually, with another running joke: dad's approving "that's it, you're going to hell. Get on the bus, I'm driving." (It should be noted that dad doesn't drive, and never has.) Dad started using @SataniCow as his online handle, which led to a merging of the memes: Satanicow drives the bus (which is also a milk truck) to Hell. Satanicow giving commands with the hand gesture and dad's "get on the bus, I'm driving" both exist, but now there's also random shouting of "BEEP BEEP I'M A MILK TRUCK" when one of us felt especially like a milk truck. I got power armor in a game and burst through a wall- "BEEP BEEP I'm a MILK TRUCK" dad crashes into grandma because she gives no shits about traffic flow around her in the house- "BEEP BEEP MILK TRUCK COMING THROUGH"

 

I want to steal some of these.

 

Go ahead! We think it's great when we infect others.

"BEEP BEEP I'M A MILK TRUCK" was the Forum Mystery for a while on my friend's forum, because it was my user title and when said friend asked me about it my only answer was "MOO." Every time I introduced myself to a new member they'd ask why I was a milk truck, and I'd just go "MOO" and it was great because I didn't do anything else cow-related on the whole forum :D Dad and I thought it was hilarious.

My aunt's account somewhere was Bytchcakes, because she was patient zero for baking bitchcakes (she was pregnant at the time and very snippy, and after yelling at dad for something minor he went "what, are you baking bitchcakes?" and it stuck) but they made her change it

 

I'm in Yorkshire and I've heard "clough" for the female groin area on multiple occasions, but nowhere on the internet seems to mention this usage! Looking it up shows the meaning of a "cleft or chasm", which is obviously the source of the other use, but it's weird that nobody's mentioned the euphemistic version.

 

a) yes
b) i think "story" and "dick", and "waffles" and "ghouls", being swapped is also noteworthy

 

That one exists in german too! "Den Teufel an die Wand malen"
"Hals über Kopf" is equivalent to "Ass over teakettle", though it makes slightly more sense. (If your neck is above your head, you are upside down.) However, it can also mean hastily and chaotically, as in "Hals über Kpof aufbrechen" (To leave hastily)

 

"Von hinten durch die Brust isn Auge" is equivalent to "Around your ass to your elbow" The long and complicated way to achieve something. Literally "From behind through the chest and into the eye"

 

I'm quite fond of 'Couldn't find their arse with both hands looking' for when someone is particularly incompetent at something.

 

"Were you christened with curdled milk?" - Are you crazy, why the fuck did you think that's a good idea
"Got their driver's license from Neckermann" - Neckermann being (or was) a mail-order company, meaning they can't drive
"Didn't eat wisdom with spoons, either" - Either in reference to someone doing something dumb, or being hypocritical in that regard
"Traditionell" - Lit. 'traditional', the important part being a very particular intonation, meaning 'following what has always been done without thinking about it, and refusing change without thinking about it'

Spoiler: domestic violence mention

"The devil is beating his wife" - Meaning weather with sun and rain simultanously

And a family meme: Someone remarking that my dad and I look similar, and me checking my chin for a beard.

 

Weird regional(?) thing, "dart" for cigarette. I only started hearing/noticing it when i moved here.

 

I have a couple personal memes among myself and my friends. The main one is "Sethrial quote of the day" on facebook. My conversations go weird places, and when I say something particularly memorable I share it, usually without context, on the book of faces. Another one is "I have so many things," about the huge collection of drinks I always end up with when we go to larping events. If I have fewer than four by the end of dinner it's unusual.

 

i have a few inside jokes with a lot of my friends but some of my absolute faves are
'they're holding three sodas'- used to imply that the people are dating/making out, which sort of came from this long story about who holds all the soda cups when two people are making out? them? a innocent bystander? who knows!!

by far my FAVORITE i've ever heard is 'consult the sponge'. My old theater teacher said it and i have no fucking clue what it means. `

 

consult the Helix Fossil

 

Who else has heard the saying "too big for your britches"? It essentially means someone is being really egotistical.

 

I’ve heard it a fair bit, personally!

 

I've heard it in media but I don't think I've ever heard it said in a natural situation.