Is this what they call a "crisis"?

yeah, it definitely sounds like that med at that dose isn't working for you! it miiiiiiight start working if you do increase the dose, but it might be a good idea to start asking about trying something else. when I went on my meds I noticed an effect like right away because the onset of action is something like half an hour, and if it's working you should notice a change in focus almost immediately. it's not like anti-depressants where sometimes you have to take them for a while before they start to kick in.

 

Yeah, as I mentioned before, reviews say that it doesn't work well in adults (or even older children), so I wasn't expecting much. I'm going to see the doctor again in a couple weeks, so I'm going to keep upping the dose (until I hit the 4 pill limit, of course) and then tell him I'd like to try something different when I see him next. (I'd be tempted to try to make an earlier appointment, but they're usually pretty booked it would seem, so especially at this point, it's probably impossible.)

 

Update: up to 3 pills/day still today.

Had a headache last night (probably dehydration/loud nosies) so I went to bed at 8, 9 PM. Woke up this morning around 7, obviously wide awake. Was fine until shortly after taking 2 pills (have been taking 2 morning, 1 afternoon). Very tired now. Think this may be connected as my sleep schedule has been pretty regular for the past several days and I got nearly 12 hours of sleep and didn't notice tiredness until after pills.

Still seeing no clear improvement in focus/ADHD-related executive dysfunction. Feel like it wouldn't matter anyway because being tired makes focus that much harder.

Possible improvement in impulsivity, but that's not why I'm seeking treatment. Also, have not been able to fully test this, obviously. (I'm just basing it on me and my friends' attempt to cheat a rigged arcade game. We did not try very many times. It was very rigged.)

EDIT:

Just found out that indigestion is a "less common" side effect of these meds. I have been having way more upset stomach issues since increasing the dosage, but honestly figured they were the result of my occasionally shitty eating habits (I love me some acidic foods, and I also tend to eat things on an empty stomach that should not be).

But this kind of lines up too perfectly. Will report with more details in the coming days..

(Also thank for the support as I've been using this thread as a diary. It's totally not necessary, but very appreciated and makes me feel a lot less alone in this.)

 

Again with the tiredness and sick stomach feeling setting in shortly after meds, neither was present before taking them. Was honestly going to wait longer to update on this, but both suspected side effects showed up within an hour of taking meds, don't think this one could be coincidence.

Got a reasonable amount of sleep last night, too, and didn't have a headache or anything else that could have contributed to poor sleep. WAY more tired than I should be, seemingly out of nowhere. Want to continue testing the meds, but also considering tapering back down to a smaller amount, because even if there was significant improvement, these side effects would pretty much negate it.

 

One of the ssri's I took made me sleepy regardless of how much sleep I got, so I switched to taking it before bed. The medication didn't work for me longterm and it sounds like yours isn't really working for you either, but switching the timing did mean being sleepy wasn't a problem anymore.

 

The biggest problem is this is supposed to be taken twice a day, so I think I'd still end up having to deal with the sleepy at some point if I'm on a higher dose.

This definitely doesn't seem to be working, since the low dose did nothing, and I can't really tell if the higher dose is effective when it's halfway knocking me out. =/ But it doesn't seem to be helping either. I might see if taking it before bed helps, just to see if a higher dose has /any/ perceptible effects, but I can't deal with feeling sick to my stomach 90% of the time if that doesn't go away.

Still, I'm sticking it out because I'm a paranoid piece of shit who doesn't feel like anyone will believe him without lots of evidence. So I'm trying to document all the reasons why this isn't working so I don't forget about them and can adequately explain myself.

 

HI IM NOT DEAD JUST NOT MUCH HAS HAPPENED BUT ALSO A LOT HAS HAPPENED.

Not much time to update but I figured I really should lmao. So today was appointment with ADHD doc, and I told him what happened with the old meds, and he prescribed Ritalin and hooooooooooooly shit I can focus, I can decide to do something and ACTUALLY GET UP AND DO IT, I can focus without strictly hyper-focusing and I didn't realize that was even possible.

Pretty happy that it may soon be time for this thread to come to a close, it's been a wild ride. (But I'm not going to call it just yet. Today is only the first day after all.)

 

So far the Ritalin is doing wonders, it WAY cuts down on the amount of executive dysfunction and it's pretty awesome actually being able to focus. Doc warned me about side effects at first, only really mentioning headache, but I've only had that happen once since I started, so that's pretty great. (And I have migraines a lot so honestly headaches are not a big deal to me compared to the side effects of the last med.)

Started playing Detective Pikachu and actually fucking read what was going on, which I often have an issue with when I play games in Japanese with no voice acting in some places. (Mostly because I get bored and frustrated because I can't read as fast in Japanese as English. Thankfully the game does have voice acting in important scenes, but there's still some stuff that needs to just be read.)

I feel a lot less disconnected from social events now that I can stay focused on what I want to rather than whatever pops into my head, which is really good because I'm kind of used to feeling disconnected. (I dissociate pretty often, too, so I'm pretty much always in some state of disconnection from myself and others and it really sucks.)

Anyway, I might keep updating this thread for a little while like this just because I really want to talk about how happy I am that this is working!! But I would say the issues I made the thread for are probably wrapped up now. It feels good to have my most serious (easily fixable) brain problems under some sort of control, and helps with managing the non or less fixable ones as well.

IMPORTANT EDIT: ALSO my anxiety is even more under control now because I don't have this restless feeling ALL THE TIME which I honestly was just so used to??? I don't constantly feel like I have to do all the things at once and I'm going to be honest I had no idea what that felt like. I used to be anxious all the time because I wasn't getting things done fast enough so I could move onto the NEXT THING TO DO, and always frustrated that I couldn't just do like... everything at the same time. But now I can actually be like, "K im gonna do this. Then that. Then that." and not only can I focus on it but I can even carry out that plan at all.

I'd ask how no one ever noticed how fuckin ADHD I was before, but I'm pretty sure it's because it's fairly likely that BOTH of my parents were also ADHD as fuck. I'm pretty sure my mom is, and well... my mom knew not to fuck with me when I was hyperfocusing because my dad did it, too. Even if that wasn't because of ADHD, it explains why she thought it was normal. (Given the number of hobbies he had and other stuff I remember about him, as well as the fact he was probably autistic, I'd say it's pretty likely he had it too though.)

 

Well, I guess the ride's not over yet. Sorry I've been mostly quiet/lurking... Well, I say that mostly because of what I'm about to post.

So the last couple days I had some shortness of breath, but didn't want to panic and immediately attribute it to the new meds (especially since I'd been fine the little more than a week since I started) but as it persisted today, I called my doctor and basically got, "Stop meds, if it doesn't get better in a few days, go to the ER." So uh... that's actually kind of terrifying, to be honest. I'm trying not to panic because that'll make it worse and just generally not be helpful, but I'm honestly kind of scared. I don't want to worry my gf (who seems okay knowing as much as I know--I was anxious and had her call the doctor for me) so I don't want to talk too much at her about this but... ugh idk.

I hope the next meds I try actually help, I was so excited because the ritalin was really REALLY helping me. I don't want to go back to not being able to do shit.

 

Panicking like fuck.

 

zi hate evyring

 

Update: I'm fine, will probably talk to doctor, was probably result of me being a dumbass who drinks too much coffee and forgets that it has caffeine in it.