Kintsugi Plays Dragon Age 2 (a winner is me!)

Varric: "...but there were just too many spiders, and Hawke died in a blaze of glory."
Cassandra: "......"
Varric: "I'm just shittin' ya. Nah, actually she went for the Arcane Horror first, and-*long description of fight scene*"
Cassandra: "*nods*"
Varric: "...and then more spiders dropped from the ceiling, and those killed her."
Cassandra: "TETHRAS."
Varric: "Okay, okay, for real this time-"

 

<3 i love you

 

>FOR REAL THIS TIME


ahh

thump


a good tactic: take out the archers instead of just letting them shoot at you the whole fight

THANK. used more potions than I'd like, but hey, we did it.

 

Oh hello who are you





):

>Kelder?



>_?

 

> Are you hurt?

 

>Are you hurt?








>_?

 

>Demons?

 

Kirkwall may be Hellpocalypse City, but I'm pretty sure that's not the usual DA demon MO...

 

>Demons?







All choice icons.
>_?

 

...

On the one hand this guy should proooobably die, on the other I don't really want to tell that to the girl's face.

 

"Hey, Aveline, you're the cop, how 'bout YOU tell the victim everything's gonna be all right while I go vigilante-murder the perp?"

 

Exactly!

 

We could always just lie and choose >This isn't my decision.
(This is DA, EVERYTHING is your decision.)

 

for what it's worth, this can be a lie, and the companions don't react to it as if it's your final decision.

 

I would go with the lie of >I'll try to show him mercy

 

We are stressing out WAY TOO MUCH over a dialogue choice that doesn't actually affect anything. :::PPP

 

>I'll try to show him mercy
(by which I mean I'll kill him instead of stringing him up upside down for the spiders to eat)

 

let's go with "This isn't my decision"
because its the decision of the mysterious voices in sparrow's head

 

Also I really appreciate the idea of game overs just being Varric getting dramatic/messing around. I love meta like that... (there's a mechanic that will boost your party's stats after you wipe in certain Final Fantasy 14 instances, people have theorized it's because your Magical Protag Mind Powers are giving you visions of doomed futures [a.k.a. the wipes] so you don't fuck up like they did.)

Spoiler: this is late and also kinda dumb

Ages later it occurs to me I could have run even further with the Carver = Tit Hawke joke and referred to Bethany as Booby Hawke, and then the Bird Naming would be complete. It's too bad you can't name your siblings like you can name your rival in Pokemon.

Also I feel a little bad making fun of her because Bethany is a sweetheart and also dead, but it appeals to my terrible sense of humor.

 

I know Inquisition canonized the fan theory that the reason waves of bad guys just seem to drop out of the sky is Varric describing it badly. :::PPP