Kitchen And Craft Wix Corner (Exciteable Bird, Enter At Own Risk)

oh my GOD this is hysterical
maikel, unfortunately aware that his reputation fits right in with sleeping with a random dude: my what now

 

Matt absolutely wears tight pants to party. Or very short pants, but either way: Rip Ryol, at least Matt will also drive him to the ER.

..how bad are Aulus exes, but generally the answer is still yes. Matt is ready to throw down with all his 5ft

Matt will also go hiking with Sindri, tho Sindri will have to deal with Matt taking 500 plant photos and collecting seeds and stuff

...yes Bryn may carry him. Princess carry only, please and thank you. He's gonna be so extra about this.

 

REALLY fucking bad. Aulus spent half of his career in the military zeroing in on who the biggest piece of shit abusive asshole in any given room was and trying to sleep with them to get ahead

Also sindri is 100% down for plant pics, Gydha is probably there too and also is taking pictures of plants lmao

Bryn will 100% princess carry him, or carry him on one of her shoulders like the chunky, muscular giantess she is. Look at her, she caught a cute twink, now properly be nice to the cute twink

 

Ryol, acting exactly like his dad: YOUR HONOR. AND INNOCENCE. YOUR WORSHIP THINK OF THE RUMORS--

 

..okay so every incarnation of Matt is Down To Fight, but only d2! and summoningverse! actually go through with it. Slutty ihop!Matt....will not start a physical fight, but find ways to torment them the way only an employee of the state can make your life miserable. They will never get a license for ANYTHING renewed.

IDEAL this happens once, and the next time Bryn is out with him, Matt wears his shiniest outits to ensure that people Pay Attention

 

bfkdhdkFKFHJGFJR
maikel: im sorry my WHAT
maikel: also what rumours, are they worse than the ones going around now

 

now i'M just
imagining them fucking once and ryol is convinced this means they are engaged and will do like. the whole Courtly Romance thing. Getting Maikel flowers and small cute trinkets, and trying to protect him

 

maiekl would
die
Literally Die
he is very easily attached and would Die Of Happy

 

that is ADORABLE

 

you know i don't like poetry much, I'm not a big fan of it, and most of it makes my brain itch
but i will fucking throw down with people who decide to be weird and elitist and decide certain poems are too mundane and banal and the language is too basic and not flowery enough. Fuck you and I will use my entire almost finished literature degree to read you the riot act about your inability to perceive nuances and subtleties

also i want a black persimmon bonsai but that has nothing to do with that

 

*hands you some boxing gloves for the throwdown*

 

how come i fucking find out about there being brownish blueish black japanese persimmons (Diospyros Kaki 'kuro gaki')and THEN find out absolutely nowhere in my country seems to sell them. woe, death, pain, etc
tho there is a different one (Diospyros Lotus) that also has blue black fruits, the fruits are a lot smaller... it *is* less hardy though. (Diospyros Lotus is usually the rootstock on which diospyros kaki are grafted tho which confuses me a little wrt how hardy they are then. eh. I'd need to mildly shelter both during winters that dip below -5C anyways)
also diospyros lotus has sexed flowers most of the time so i'd need a male and female one, sighs

 

.... half the places say male and female plants exist half say a single plant developes both types of flowers.

 

well somebody's got weird mutant plants...

 

this one shop theoretically has prunus mume (japanese "apricot", the thing ume is made from) too.... but they cannot deliver the lotus plum right now........ do i risk it anyways or do I wait for the tree and shrub market to potentially maybe happen in spring.....

 

BETRAYAL THE TREE AND SHRUB MARKET CANNOT HAPPEN AGAIN THIS YEAR
fuck the pandemic i want to buy plants this is so homophobic

 

oh ruuuuuude

*beats up corona to free your plant options*

 

i am being victimized by plants I cannot easily keep existing
could set up a fucking grow light in my dank basement
alternatively
are daylight lamps and growlamps significantly different bc i have a daylight lamp i'm not using bc it's fucking ugly as sin

 

bonsai wishlist of plants to acquire

• attempt 2 at sorbus aucuparia, electric boogaloo
• witch hazel
• maybe? maybe i try larch again?
• diospyros lotus
• prunus mume
• i still desperately want to see about getting a hydrangea lmao

 

afaik as long as it's full-spectrum you should be fine for most plants that don't have particular needs