Discussion in 'General Chatter' started by jacktrash, Feb 26, 2015.

  1. pixels

    pixels hiatus / only back to vent

    I used the word "shitbird" to a friend who was brought up in by a Baptist pastor in describing parents who skip on their child support.

    I've also used "shitting a slippery marlin" and "shitting an entire live weasel" to describe how angry I was.
    • Like x 2
  2. lvkz

    lvkz Well-Known Karkat

    today i called my cat something really brilliant like dinglefuckler or something but it just casually slipped out and i didn't even realize what i was saying and now i'll never say anything clever again
    • Like x 1
  3. Lazarae

    Lazarae The tide pod of art

    Not my most original, especially since it's an actual thing, but it made my dad laugh. I was getting my ass kicked during the Mortal Kombat story mode and ended up shouting "You entire can of pickled fish assholes!" at the Shang Tsung + Quan Chi tag-team after they killed me (again).

    I thought I might have accidentally killed my dad, he was laughing so hard from the other room :D
    • Like x 5
  4. BPD anon

    BPD anon Here I sit, broken hearted

    Every time I see one of the Seebs gang say "doublehitler" I end up laughing again. It's, like, twice the Hitler.
    • Like x 6
  5. unknownanonymous

    unknownanonymous i am inimitable, i am an original|18+

    @Lazarae cans of pickled fish assholes actually exist?! who the fuck needs a fucking can of pickled fish assholes?!
    just... wow... people and the stuff they create...
    • Like x 1
  6. Arxon

    Arxon Well-Known Member

    @BPD anon [​IMG]

    Also, the stuff I say when I am doing math is basically just foul word salad. Actual conversation:
    Me: *screeching at math problem* You goddamn tit fucking tit squad!
    Friend: *wryly* Well that's just an insult to the good name of the tit fucking tit squad.
    • Like x 3
  7. prismaticvoid

    prismaticvoid Too Too Abstract

    A good friend of mine likes to pull a Karkat and attach douche or ass to random nouns. My favorite is defs "asslamp".
    In the realm of non-swears, Yiddish cursing is the best. I tend to go that route when driving, so I end up with things like "may you be late to all your appointments forever."
    • Like x 6
  8. Kaycashew

    Kaycashew guinea pig hearder

    When someone is being a real pain, I like to say "heinous anus" :-)
  9. Fish butt

    Fish butt Everything is coming together, slowly but surely.

    Did anyone mention the excellent Dutch word "antfucker"? It's for when someone is being needlessly anal about details.
    • Like x 7
  10. prismaticvoid

    prismaticvoid Too Too Abstract

    @Fish butt I'm slightly annoyed by how much sense that makes.
    • Like x 3
  11. The Frood Abides

    The Frood Abides Doesn't Know Where His Rug Is

    This thread needs more Malcolm Tucker.
  12. plant guardian

    plant guardian Local Sword Gremlin

    I like soggy armchair
    • Like x 1
  13. prismaticvoid

    prismaticvoid Too Too Abstract

    Also on the subject of petty curses: "May you spend the rest of your life constantly aware that your toes are touching"

    it's funny because my sensory issues make me whole life like that
    • Like x 4
    • Winner x 1
    • Witnessed x 1
  14. Raire

    Raire Turquoise Helicoid

    I called someone a smegma farmer today, @michinyo can attest.

    I also use douchecanoe a lot, and end up trying to vary it a bit. "Biketwit", "horsejerk" (also implying you are jerking out a horse so I guess it is a variant of horsefucker"), "cartwit", using transportation as a theme.

    "What the gold digging Christ" came out once.

    If we want to go biological, there is "bile stone", "liver globule", and "wax plug". Not one of my favorites but useful.

    My Puritan raised friend used dodohead when we were kids.

    Nothing really matches swearing in Spanksh though. Somehow it feels a lot more visceral and raw.

    I avoid using guano or compost as an insult, those are useful and guano used to be worth a lot of money back on the day!
    • Like x 1
  15. Everett

    Everett local rats so small, so tiny

    in college a couple classmates from the maritimes got "godfuck" to catch on

    also just saying "piss" in a really short way like, "pis" is fun

    "aw beans"
    • Like x 1
  16. Wiwaxia

    Wiwaxia problematic taxon

    there are few insults that are not improved by adding "milquetoast" as an adjective.
    • Like x 3
  17. Aviari

    Aviari PartyWolf Is In The House Tonight

    I've called an incredibly useless coplayer in a vidjagaem a "crotch blistering fuckstain"

    This was prefaced by "Jegus titty-fucking Christ, what is wrong with you?"

    My dog answers to:
    and a bunch of others
    Last edited: Jul 1, 2016
    • Like x 1
  18. Nertbugs

    Nertbugs Information Leafblower

    I actually have a list on my phone of the best insults I come across. (And that list is going to grow exponentially because of this thread). A few from said list, including a whole bunch of Malcolm Tucker-isms and a few I'm sure I found in the CDCF threads:
    • Unholy dildo
    • Shit spewing lawn sprinkler
    • Fuckface Von Clownstick
    • As useless as a marzipan dildo
    • Snivelling shitweasel
    • Hurricane of piss
    • Double wank and shit chips
    • Bastard quisling leak
    • Dead human skin
    • Fucking balaclava
    • Fucking Bagpuss
    • The Ghost of Christmas Shit
    • As on the ball as a dead seal
    • Mouldy shower curtain
    • Not the sharpest bulb in the brewery
    • Rectal jester
    • Hamfisted shitlark
    • Metric tonne of titbadgers
    • Goose-eyed wankstain
    • Shitgibbon
    • Joy vampire
    • Like x 4
  19. unknownanonymous

    unknownanonymous i am inimitable, i am an original|18+

    that was from Version Of the Mona Lisa with Eyebrows tumblr post, yeah? that or luka said it in some other context, right?
  20. Aviari

    Aviari PartyWolf Is In The House Tonight

    I think that's what a comedian I'm completely blanking on called Donald Trump.

    Oh, also used the other day, at Tiny Terrorist Kitten:

    Edit: John Stewart?
    • Like x 2
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