My Mom just tried to commit suicide, what do I do?

Discussion in 'General Advice' started by emythos, May 23, 2015.

  1. Lissiel

    Lissiel Dreaming dead

    You are seriously an amazing, awesome kid. Youve been through a really rough scary patch here. Anything you can do to protect and care for yourself will be a good thing. Eat some icecream. Watch a silly movie. Have a nice hot bath, or a nap. Whatever makes you feel good and replenished, because this has taken a lot out of you and you deserve care. I know you're worried about your mom and everything, but seriously. Taking care of you is 100% the most you ought to be doing rn. And not in any way a thing to feel bad about.
     
    • Like x 1
  2. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    I'm going to go out and do a small grocery shop, and buy myself chocolate chip ice cream, and eat all of it while watching cartoons :)
     
    • Like x 6
  3. Beldaran

    Beldaran 70% abuse and 30% ramen

    As for doctor things, you don't need an appointment to walk into the ER, confess a suicide attempt and likely psychotic break, and be taken in. All that needs to happen is her getting to the hospital. You can choose the hospital of course, and there are a lot of good ones in your area, but that doesn't need to involve lots of scheduling and whatnot. That's for if your mom agrees to go.

    ... I could ask my dad how shit went down when my mom was involuntarily held in the hospital I suppose. I don't remember how she got taken in, only that she was there for two or three weeks when her postpartum depression got to the point where my brothers and I were in danger.

    But it doesn't need to come to that, your dad could be way more proactive and insistent here. :I

    Your mom needs emergency medical care as urgently as if she'd lost a limb. A doctor's appointment is not going to cut it.
     
    • Like x 4
  4. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    The problem is getting her to go, yeah. She really really really hates hospitals.

    Yeah, so far what we've been going on is that she's going to go in (they should be calling us soon) and her doctor is going to say "get thee to a hospital" but not in those words.
     
  5. wixbloom

    wixbloom artcute

    @emythos I've been quiet here because I have nothing to say that would help, but you're really brave to be going through all this and I'm here if you need to vent, ok? Hugs to you.
     
  6. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    Thank you so very much. I may end up needing to take you up on that, cause:
    We got the police called, a very nice and very bald officer showed up, he chatted politely with mom, I found out she tried to kill herself waaaaaaaaay earlier than I thought, and that she hears voices in her head and thinks there's a government conspiracy taking notes on her that's out to get me and everyone she talks to.
    I'm probably going to be driving her to the hospital once her doctor calls.
     
  7. wixbloom

    wixbloom artcute

    @emythos That sucks. I found out my dad's schizotypal this year, and it's horrible to discover that an important parental figure is so severely out of touch with reality. For me at least, it made me question everything I thought I knew about him (including lots of things I "thought I knew" that kept me from seeing him as he really is, which is a whole other suck).

    Also, I just sent you a PM ;)
     
  8. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    Same thing here. It's like, she never seemed that out of touch, even at her worst, and now it's just like, wait what.
    I saw <3
     
    • Like x 1
  9. Lissiel

    Lissiel Dreaming dead

    Ok so liking your post isnt really what i mean, that shit really really sucks. But im glad shes getting help and im glad youre being supported. Your dad is going with you to thw hospital?
     
  10. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    I know what you mean, and yeah, he will be
     
    • Like x 3
  11. jacktrash

    jacktrash spherical sockbox

    @emythos you're a trooper, and i hope it's not too presumptuous to say i'm proud of you.

    i ended up being the primary caregiver for my mom a lot when i was in high school, and even though her illnesses were physical, not mental, it still messed me up in a lot of ways. part of the reason was that no one seemed to recognize that it was inappropriate to put a 16-year-old in charge of running a household as well as going to school (and a pretty tough school at that) and taking care of my younger brother, so i got no emotional support and only the most perfunctory of backpats. i grew up thinking that living as a basically autonomous adult with three dependants (two of whom i had no authority over and one who was That Age and fought me on everything) was perfectly normal and that things like my grades tanking, having breakdowns, drinking and having unprotected sex and getting in fights and just generally exploding, were all on me and just signs that i was Not Good Enough.

    i don't want you to have to go through anything like that. i want you to understand that this is an exceptional circumstance, and by stepping up the way you've done, you are going above and beyond the call of duty. i want you to keep an eye on your own health and well-being. and i want you to remember that this is a society where adults are responsible for children, not the other way around, and you deserve to be protected and supported. it's not wrong or weak to need that.

    parents aren't perfect. sometimes they get sick. sometimes they get frazzled by their spouse's illness and can't handle it quite right. that doesn't mean they're bad people. but that also doesn't mean that you are the parent now.
     
    • Like x 7
  12. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    thank you. (if you could see my face right now you could tell there's no way you're being too presumptuous. I read just that sentence and started grinning like a total dork. omg, someone cool is proud of me?!?!)
    That sounds horrible, and I'm really sorry you ever had to deal with that. Thank you for this entire message. She should be getting help soon, so it'll be break time soon enough. I'm going to relax and drink tea and light candles and write, and try to be okay after all this.
    In other news, I can't remember the name of the police officer who talked to us and I keep think of him as Officer Risotto. I think I should cook something.
     
    • Like x 5
  13. Magpie

    Magpie a nest full of shiny things

    So glad to hear things are happening towards a resolution! And yep, I agree with Jesse. You're awesome and you should feel awesome about yourself (even if you don't feel awesome about the situation). Just remember that you could probably PM anybody in this thread for talking if you should need to after this, even just to destress. Get thee to the kitchen and make a food. You well deserve it!
     
    • Like x 3
  14. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    Thank you so much, and I will remember that.
    I'm gonna do that now :)
     
    • Like x 3
  15. a tiny mushroom

    a tiny mushroom the tiniest

    My uncle was hospitalised at the beginning of the year for psychosis and paranoia, and I've seen how tough it was for him and my aunt and cousin. I am really happy that your mum is getting help! All the internet hugs and good vibes for you and your family.
     
    • Like x 1
  16. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    thank you very much
     
  17. Lazarae

    Lazarae You won't be the death of me

    My aunt's been diagnosed paranoid schizo since before I was born. I haven't spent a lot of time around her but both my parents have and I can ping them for advice if you need any. There's a lot of the same paranoia and breaks from reality so hopefully any advice they have could be helpful.

    If not you still get internet hugs. I don't have much to say that hasn't been said already. How are you holding up? I saw you were planning a break and to get food- did you?

    As someone who will completely ignore its physical/mental health in order to be OK during a crisis, I just wanna remind you to take care of yourself.
     
  18. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    Actually, yeah. So when she starts doing the paranoid rambles, how am I supposed to talk to her? Cause during the midnight car ride from hell I was playing along until I figured out wtf she was saying, and then today I've been just trying to calmly reassure her that no government agents with clipboards are going to kidnap me in the ice cream isle of shaws.
    *hugs* I'm holding up okay, I had some meatloaf and cider, and I'm going to eat some cookies in a bit. I'm kinda zonked, but at least she's going to get help and I have a better idea of what's going through her head.
     
  19. wes scripserat

    wes scripserat Hephaestus

    PM box is open for rants.
    or we can continue dresden files if wanted.
    I may not always know what to say though
     
    • Like x 1
  20. emythos

    emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

    Both work. Besides, I don't always know what to say either.
     
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