Other PSA on users' personal experiences and public sharing thereof

Discussion in 'That's So Meta!' started by palindromordnilap, Dec 2, 2017.

  1. palindromordnilap

    palindromordnilap Well-Known Member

    Some people on this forum, including the admins, have a functional memory, or something approaching that. As such, they will remember your experiences and use them as examples in arguments if they consider them to be relevant to the discussion they're having. If you do not consent to (even vague and non-identifying) parts of your personal history being used that way, find some place where the staff and every user guarantees they won't do this.
    (Not trying to start drama, just reformulating the ITA post in a way I consider less inflammatory.)
     
    • Agree x 5
    • Like x 1
    • Witnessed x 1
  2. Vierran

    Vierran small and sharp

    I do think there is a genuine issue with using others' trauma as a rhetorical device. It's a boundary violation and a betrayal of trust. And if dozens of people can tell exactly what situation you're referring to, you have not removed identifying information.

    To give an overly personal example, I had an abortion as a teenager, and I experienced that as traumatic. I could easily imagine someone taking that story and that experience and using it to argue that abortion should be illegal. That would be possibly one of the most triggering things I can imagine.

    I know that we can't stop people from using information we give them to support their arguments. I still think the decent thing to do is to use others' stories with caution and listen if they tell us to stop.
     
    • Agree x 14
  3. palindromordnilap

    palindromordnilap Well-Known Member

    Yeah. Honestly, I'd say typical implicit rules for this are "Okay unless the other person says it's not", but I feel boundaries should still absolutely be respected.
     
  4. boop

    boop beepbeep

    worth noting that seebs has since edited their post to remove the reference being complained about
     
  5. devils-avocado

    devils-avocado tired and gay

    at what point was that reference removed? because I was trying to find it (or whatever the fuck) about ten hours ago and didn't find shit
     
    • Agree x 1
  6. Ouija

    Ouija Nani the fuck?

    the one that didnt get removed, actually? well, it's right here.
     
    • Informative x 4
  7. Fucker

    Fucker Bæsj

    Just so it’s on the record if anyone uses my traumatic shit as a rhetorical device in internet arguments they are getting virtually ass whooped
     
    • Agree x 2
  8. Tea and Rain

    Tea and Rain angry squirrel

    A. I had a suspicion this was the case. B. No one gets to use my ongoing health/medical and chronic pain trauma for internet arguments without my permission. It's too raw. The exception is if you think physical pain or a lack of sleep is blunting my judgment and I am being an asshole, but please check in with me first. C. I just wanted to get that on record somewhere.
     
    • Agree x 2
  9. boop

    boop beepbeep

    my bad thought i was looking at that post but i guess its a different one i saw
     
    • Agree x 1
  10. devils-avocado

    devils-avocado tired and gay

    thanks for the link. I don't think I'd gone back far enough to see it.
    there seem to be a bunch of versions with different replies, I had the same issue
     
    • Informative x 1
  11. context-free anon

    context-free anon Well-Known Member

    tumblr is great at threading
     
    • Agree x 3
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