Out of context quotes thread

Re Allyssa · Aug 9, 2016

Me to my friend while the dog is laying on me said:

sorry if i post weird stuff, thor keeps aying on \my +++++5c4
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blue · Aug 9, 2016 at 11:20 PM

these animals! my cats are always aying on \our +++++5c4

paladinkit · Aug 10, 2016 at 1:02 AM

the author speaks said: ↑

But most of those people were dimensional elites, and unlikely to have had to resort to chicken monsters.
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cleverThylacine · Aug 10, 2016 at 1:27 AM

Carnivore said: ↑

if science lets me graft a dog head onto another dog or put a cat in a box and say its a zombie then i can stick someones uterus in someone else's abdomen.

science is the cool parent
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@the author speaks and I approve this message

Ipuntya · Aug 10, 2016 at 11:26 AM

Ipuntya said:

if all star is a shrek version of star platinum, then would the world's on fire be the shrek equivalent of the world
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NumiTuziNeru · Aug 10, 2016 at 3:12 PM

potatos lack primary sexual characteristics because they are potatos
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LadyNighteyes · Aug 10, 2016 at 4:29 PM

Because nothing says “sexy” like “imminent danger of frostbite and hypothermia”
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Jojo · Aug 10, 2016 at 4:49 PM

"If you need any old superstitions I'll be selling mine for $1 each"
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strictly quadrilateral · Aug 10, 2016 at 5:19 PM

>implying lesbians can't teleport

swirlingflight · Aug 10, 2016 at 5:47 PM

plurk friend said:

GASTER ISN'T MISSING HE JUST BECAME A POKEMON VILLAIN
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Imoyram · Aug 10, 2016 at 7:49 PM

I'm going to salivate like the wind
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Wiwaxia · Aug 11, 2016 at 3:22 AM

Carnivore said: ↑

nothing is illegal at walmart
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paladinkit · Aug 11, 2016 at 4:26 AM

Aondeug said: ↑

truly boethiah taught these people responsible architecture
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cleverThylacine · Aug 11, 2016

the author speaks said: ↑

Well, maybe you should give me the benefit of the doubt. Since I'm not dating a demon and someone else's cheating husband. This time. (And I'm not going to do that again!)
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a tiny mushroom · Aug 11, 2016 at 5:13 AM

@alchemicalheart: "sometimes I feel like the bat but mostly that is just part of the crab process"

emythos · Aug 11, 2016 at 8:28 AM

"fuck off, Minnesota"

palindromordnilap · Aug 11, 2016 at 8:29 AM

Please do not nuke the Eevee
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esotericPrognosticator · Aug 11, 2016

I hope you all are ready for a fuckton of hi-larious quotes, because man do @renegadereveler and I have some interesting textual conversations. ladies and gentlemen and otherwise, I am proud to present A²: The Debut!

eP: like what are they gonna do to your dad’s firm “your KID goes to a THERAPIST. CHECKMATE ATHEISTS”
rR: OBViously

eP: I don’t remember his name but fuck if I don’t remember his terrible handshake

like. we get it. you’re gay. that’s nice
rR: You don't gotta shove it in our palms
eP: exACTLY

eP: although I also am not from the elemental plane of Ca$h Money so could I perhaps get your input on which you think is most appropriate

eP: anyway so Robert the spy from the Soviet Union of the Future implants nuclear codes in my brain got it

eP: I thought Putin ate all his children as soon as they were born á la Cronos

eP: you come into my house on this, the day of my daughter’s wedding,

and you tell me that my mother’s boyfriend is a Soviet spy………….

rR: So many faces

My headsonas
My altermates
My altarboys

eP: the man and the meme are beginning to blur
rR: THER WAS NEVE A MAN ONLE A MEM

eP: his scream is very high-pitched and he deploys it frequently once I counted and he averaged one scream every two and a half minutes

I love him

eP: they are both nerd children but he is like. an infinite nerd child fractal spinning into endless infinities of nerd children

eP: the magical bondage is incidental

eP: rip in peace child-friendly content

eP: also all the characters on GF are like. people-colored people

eP: this is just getting weirder and weirder I feel like we need to stop before we cross the incomprehensibility event horizon

eP: half-elves more like THE BEST RACE EVER amiright ladies
rR: Relatable
eP: (idk who I’m even talking to at this point there are no ladies here)
rR: Or ARE there

It is a mystery .gif
eP: Schrödinger’s lady

is she alive or is she dead STAY TUNED TO FIND OUT AFTER THESE BRIEF MESSAGES FROM OUR SPONSORS

eP: Seebs is my fav anime

eP: I thought the gods were punishing me for copy-pasting too many links or something idfk

eP: my comprehensive post history only goes back to July 4 I am almost as problematic as Seebs

eP: Seebesse

no that’s terrible
rR: Ewwww

Jeebs
eP: Seesse
rR: How do you even pronounce that
eP: too many fcking s’s and e’s

“ses-ee”
ses rhymes with chess
rR: JEEBS IS THE CLEAR SOLUTION
eP: you’re right it really is
rR: Seeëse

*Seeësse
eP: wipes a single crystalline tear

please send Seebs an ask that’s literally just that

eP: “average man shares 1 feeling per day” factoid actualy just statistical error. average man shares 0 feelings per day. Alex and Adrian Georg, who live in a puddle of their own tears & share over 3 feelings per second, are outliers adn should not have been counted

eP: anyway it just got better from there I remember with fondness the time where I made a legitimately convincing argument that Napoleon fulfilled the ideals of the French Revolution

eP: more like :y am I right ladies

eP: don't do it man

you have so much to live for
rR: NO I DONT

FOOOOOOD
eP: what will I, your loving husband, do without you
rR: Ahhh you'll survive

Forage for berries
Kill some buffalo
eP: I will be incapable of anything except for draping myself in black veils and reclining gently on surfaces and weeping
rR: GOOD
eP: that's before I waste away completely with grief though

and/or tuberculosis they're more or less interchangeable

eP: don’t worry I still have more My Mom Tackles Queer Shit stories

eP: WRT MY MOM'S LEGAL CASE

THEY FOUND THE PORN!!!!!!
I think opposing counsel sent it over again or something
it was part of discovery
which is when the sides exchange documents etc.
anyway my mom gave it to one of her paralegals and told her to see who sent it to whom exactly
said paralegal proceeded to make colored copies of all of it and then gave it back to my mom
she said it was too distressing she couldn't go through it
evidently she averted her eyes while copying or something
I would also like to point out that the fees for the copying machine used to make those copies will be charged to the client
anyway my mom's a busy lady right
so she gives it to her coworker and is like "you go through it"
he looks at like one picture inside the file
(I am present and can see the file but not the picture)
makes a face
asks me for a Sharpie
and writes like "ABSOLUTELY DO NOT LOOK AT THIS YOU WILL REGRET IT" on the outside of the file
as far as I know he is still going through it

eP: btw my mom’s coworker just gave up on the porn so she had to go through it yesterday

she was very wearied by the experience
she was like “well it was mostly of women and it’s like I’ve seen it all before you know”
#straightprivelege

eP: re: the porn she was also like “I feel bad for [opposing counsel] ‘cause he had to go through all this and he’s gay he probably got nothing out of the experience”

eP: are we really arguing about how our characters have alien sex

is that really what's happening

eP: I LOVE THE SAXOPHONE

you suggested it though I mean
"what kind of weapon do you want"
rR: I KNOW THAT JUST MAKES IT WORSE

I DID THIS TO MYSELF
eP: "a saxophone that belches fire!!!!!!!"

eP: your trollsona is safe in my sweaty little hands

eP: once my voice drops though I am going to go for the gay-ass clothes with a vengeance

I just really love scarves okay

eP: it says right there on the syllabus that it is a mathematic

rR: I believe in you dude but if you do break down it's okay and not your fault she is a human pile of snake carcasses

rR: Also if you need help hit me up and I can try to explain hte concpects intelgintly
eP: ah yes hte concpects

I am familiar with those
thanks man
rR: No problem I aim to epxliceat hte concpects
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wrt to context: ask and ye shall receive. I'm interested to find out what the hell people think we might be talking about, though. :D also, expect periodic updates, as we are an endless stream of #relatable content. these are all from, like, the past week.

blue · Aug 11, 2016 at 12:38 PM

I'm laughing about THEY FOUND THE PORN!!!! now.

furrylatula · Aug 11, 2016 at 12:44 PM

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Out of context quotes thread

Re Allyssa Sylph of Heart

blue hightown funk you up

paladinkit brave little paladin

cleverThylacine cuddles for the weird and the fierce

Ipuntya return of eggplant

NumiTuziNeru @#$%?

LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

Jojo Writin and fightin

strictly quadrilateral alive, alive, alive!

swirlingflight inane analysis and story spinning is my passion

Imoyram Well-Known Member

Wiwaxia problematic taxon

paladinkit brave little paladin

cleverThylacine cuddles for the weird and the fierce

a tiny mushroom the tiniest

emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

palindromordnilap Well-Known Member

esotericPrognosticator still really excited about kobolds tbqh

blue hightown funk you up

furrylatula a pissed off homestuck girl

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Out of context quotes thread

Re Allyssa Sylph of Heart

blue hightown funk you up

paladinkit brave little paladin

cleverThylacine cuddles for the weird and the fierce

Ipuntya return of eggplant

NumiTuziNeru @#$%?

LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

Jojo Writin and fightin

strictly quadrilateral alive, alive, alive!

swirlingflight inane analysis and story spinning is my passion

Imoyram Well-Known Member

Wiwaxia problematic taxon

paladinkit brave little paladin

cleverThylacine cuddles for the weird and the fierce

a tiny mushroom the tiniest

emythos Lipstick Hoarding Dragon

palindromordnilap Well-Known Member

esotericPrognosticator still really excited about kobolds tbqh

blue hightown funk you up

furrylatula a pissed off homestuck girl

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