Out of context quotes thread

"I was also thinking that snakes would be slick buisnessmen."
[in the chapter titles of a book] "Locking the stable door...after the horse has barricaded itself inside"

 

"dragons: ??? ?? ??? how could this happen
whales: [long slow song] we warned you bros"

EDIT:

 

@mizushimo

 

@emythos
IS BLOOD THE MAGICAL INTERNET?

 

"They're so clean and quiet and keep to themselves - wtf Greenland? Stop washing your hands and die already!"

 

"Yep, that's me, Deadname Cishet"- @Wiwaxia's housemate

 

I dream of going to hell. I'm gonna be the worst person I can be. At least then I'll finally be warm!

 

"I'm sorry for accidentally throwing a shoe at your head."

 

"His sword is a butt and a composer."

 

"But you died. You died and I gave you a shoe."

Me: "It can't eat obsidian or iron bars. Or anything else with the blast resistance of at least iron bars."
Other Guy: "So...glass panes?"
Me: "...Possibly?"

"The chunk markers keep uprooting my crops."

[quite a bit later]: Other Guy: "I redecorated!"
Me: "all my stuff is now in flint's claim."

Other Guy: "What kind of smells?"
Flint: "Jumpy smells!"

[jumping and flailing around] "I'm a kangaroo!"

"This is the third demon, why hasn't it dropped a heart?!"

"So we set up about one map from the edge of the world!"

Me: "I went into someone's dirt mine and stole a stack of dirt."
Random Other Guy: "You can't steal people's dirt!"

"You thought it was a Botania update, but it was me, DIO!"

"Great, which bee is setting me on fire?"

Spoiler: Context

Minecraft modpacks. Also a single quote from a Homestuck fanfic.