Out of context quotes thread

CONTINUED FROM ABOVE:


Dave: "Oh my god, let's convert a robot!
Turns out the Kaaba is actually just a big processor
Who knew"
Wes: "shouldn't you be converting to judaism dave?"
Dave: "Hey, the robot's reading the Quran
I wouldn't force my faith on it
Even though my faith is totally right"
Friend: " Well Bel is the robots father
But it doesn't have a mother yet
If the mother is Jewish..."
Bel: "does anyone want to raise it with me"
Friend: "Get [female Jewish friend, name redacted] in here quick!"
Dave: "[female Jewish friend, name redacted] left this chat once-- could the promise of a new cybernetic family be enough to make her stay?
Find out next time on SUCK MY RAVIOLIS: MY QUOTE GAME IS MILK"

 

Disappointment:

"I'm sorry, after my research, I don't think a computer can be Jewish"

 

Spoiler: And some only get better,

-The Chief Financial Officer of the company that managed my mother's company's finances.

Spoiler: and better.

In court.

 

*puts ukulele in mouth* This is probably someone's fetish.

 

@N am I trash that I recognize that one?

 

@lilacsofthedead unless I'm trash too, then no :)

 

"We're going to have religious strife because my stupid intolerant roboself couldn't wrap his mind around another abrahamic faith"

 

"Everyone put their sexual questions into the sexy box!"

Spoiler: I can explain

My biology teacher is teaching sex ed and so she asked us to ask anything that came to mind. The box is a tissue box, but to help us "open up" to the idea of having a no-holds-barred sex ed class she called it the sexy box.

 

what is a coarse bear.

 

@swirlingflight *ponders the implications of kosher on Klingon cuisine*

 

"wes you're guilty until proven innocent
At least in the socialist kangaroo ravioli court"

 

"I thought you were having a love affair with the cabinet"

Spoiler

does it make it funnier that my grandma said this

 

"Have you ever just taken a screwdriver and just jimmy jammed it around inside someone's head?"