Out of context quotes thread

Are twinkling butterflies not composed of internal desire for murder?

 

(because this is great out of context too)

 

Monarchs don’t twinkle but can confirm that they’re violent little fuckers. They chase the birds away from our feeder. They try to chase people too, which is usually less successful because they’re butterflies. And they don’t even twinkle.

 

on that note

 

@keltena

 

You’ll start to doubt that you ever had a toothbrush, and then you’ll ask somebody whether toothbrushes really even exist, and then you’ll be humiliated

 

It’s like he’s trying to read it off an ice cube that’s sliding down a hill.

 

The Mickey Mouse-shaped waffle iron might, in other hands, promote crimes against humanity committed with strawberry jam and sound effects.