Out of context quotes thread

budgie · Oct 12, 2019 at 7:14 PM

I am the renaissance murder boy who is sharp and pointy and high and you are so medieval and low to the ground.
Click to expand...

BaseDeltaZero · Oct 13, 2019 at 4:34 AM

"Attention passengers. We have no fuel left and will now be exiting the aircraft with our bail out chute. The pending updraft will now take you into a elliptical orbit were you will fight to the death over the 32. Oz water bottles and packaged nuts. Thank you for flying Southwest."
Click to expand...

keltena · Oct 13, 2019 at 9:37 AM

If you're going to have to sacrifice yourself for the sake of humanity, you better at least get some glitter and confetti thrown on you for the trouble
Click to expand...

LadyNighteyes · Oct 13, 2019 at 9:57 AM

@keltena I maintain that this would explain some things about the motivation of Certain Parties.

Anyway:

Verily said: ↑

I never thought I'd need the word "bonanza" for anything having to do with elk corpses, but here I stand, in the bonanza.
Click to expand...

BaseDeltaZero · Oct 13, 2019 at 5:06 PM

Everyone knows Jesters are the sexiest clowns, all the way on the top of the clown hierarchy.
Click to expand...

budgie · Oct 13, 2019 at 5:21 PM

I guess if this leads to Dick gunning down the CEO of a polluting chemical company whose head is shaped like a benzene molecule, I can’t complain.
Click to expand...

Wingyl · Oct 14, 2019 at 3:08 AM

"how does a leather spear work?
besides poorly"

Wormwitch · Oct 14, 2019 at 6:34 AM

Gotta love the Netherlands, where the options for relaxation are either getting high or lying in a grave and pretending you’re dead.

budgie · Oct 14, 2019 at 11:16 AM

Wormwitch said: ↑

Gotta love the Netherlands, where the options for relaxation are either getting high or lying in a grave and pretending you’re dead.
Click to expand...

I could use a grave right now

Loq · Oct 14, 2019

what is mucus if not person slime
Click to expand...

i am slowly hemorrhaging my sanity into a biology degree
Click to expand...

If he's keeping me up until three in the fucking morning to propose to another piece of fucking furniture I'm going to kill him
Click to expand...

LadyNighteyes · Oct 14, 2019 at 9:37 PM

You mean would I slam a baby into another baby to test its durability? No, that's not something I would typically do.
Click to expand...

BaseDeltaZero · Oct 15, 2019 at 9:15 AM

In the official timeline, Peppa Pig is appropriately reassured by a kindly dentist. In the version above, she is basically tortured, before turning into a series of Iron Man robots and performing the Learn Colours dance. A search for “peppa pig dentist” returns the above video on the front page, and it only gets worse from here.
Click to expand...

TheOwlet · Oct 15, 2019 at 5:07 PM

@IvyLB

they're functionally immortal but in the 'yes they are clinically dead and then get magically revived by space god alexa' way
Click to expand...

Verily · Oct 16, 2019 at 12:20 AM

And they're like, it's like vaporwear only it has code, which is somehow worse.
Click to expand...

Lazarae · Oct 16, 2019 at 1:49 AM

"How about 'No, I'm not going to adhere anything to my butt?'"

paladinkit · Oct 16, 2019 at 3:02 AM

...and in this case, when I say "time" I mean fuckboys.
Click to expand...

Wormwitch · Oct 16, 2019 at 11:15 AM

This is the only thing holding me back from being one of the top tier gigolos is I'm an idiot.

BaseDeltaZero · Oct 16, 2019 at 11:16 AM

Going down on a yuki onna but my tongue gets stuck to her clit like I licked a frozen flagpole
Click to expand...

ChelG · Oct 16, 2019 at 2:48 PM

Teacher: “Okay, time for roll call, everybody. *groans and takes a swig of virtual bourbon* … it appears one of us has changed our name to Assmuncher69 since yesterday. Unless Mr or Miss 69 wishes to be ejected from the school program immediately, can you kindly return your name to the way it was? Thank you. Now. *groans again* ExistenceIsPain45? There’s 45 of you? I thought the point of alternate identities was to avoid getting stuffed into lockers. Fine. Now…oh fantastic. A terrible name AND a Game of Thrones spoiler all in one. That’s it. *slams down the EJECT button, causing the offending student to disappear from the virtual classroom. Teacher glares at the class* You ruin my television, I ruin your education. Got that? And may I kindly remind you, Edgelord2000 and *deep sigh* Skankilicious360, that this is a place for education, and that I know your parents personally and am perfectly willing to inform them about your inappropriate behavior. In the meantime, Mr…2000 — the offending one!— change places with… *facepalm* JohnlockIsEndgame78. *downs the rest of the virtual bottle*”
Click to expand...

Verily · Oct 16, 2019 at 8:03 PM

Reminds me of a conversation I had with a friend about someone going by the name "Squirrelfucker" with a number after it. I seem to remember saying something about how that actually didn't seem all that strange, as "I feel like I know several Squirrelfuckers on the internet." To which he responded, "It's a pretty common name." Which I know is more context than usual for this thread, but I think it's actually funnier with context than without.

Log in or Sign up

Out of context quotes thread

budgie not actually a bird

BaseDeltaZero Shitposting all night.

keltena putting the fun in executive dysfunction

LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

BaseDeltaZero Shitposting all night.

budgie not actually a bird

Wingyl Allegedly Magic

Wormwitch I wish the Affini were real :(

budgie not actually a bird

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

BaseDeltaZero Shitposting all night.

TheOwlet A feathered pillow filled with salt and science

Verily surprised Xue Yang peddler

Lazarae The tide pod of art

paladinkit brave little paladin

Wormwitch I wish the Affini were real :(

BaseDeltaZero Shitposting all night.

ChelG Well-Known Member

Verily surprised Xue Yang peddler

Log in or Sign up

Out of context quotes thread

budgie not actually a bird

BaseDeltaZero Shitposting all night.

keltena putting the fun in executive dysfunction

LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

BaseDeltaZero Shitposting all night.

budgie not actually a bird

Wingyl Allegedly Magic

Wormwitch I wish the Affini were real :(

budgie not actually a bird

Loq rotating like a rotisserie chicknen

LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

BaseDeltaZero Shitposting all night.

TheOwlet A feathered pillow filled with salt and science

Verily surprised Xue Yang peddler

Lazarae The tide pod of art

paladinkit brave little paladin

Wormwitch I wish the Affini were real :(

BaseDeltaZero Shitposting all night.

ChelG Well-Known Member

Verily surprised Xue Yang peddler

Useful Searches