Long, very nsfw conversation between me and the boyfriends today. Spoiler: nsfw Me: Intrusive thoughts are weird. Me: Yesterday's was "You are slowly destroying every bit of hard-won happiness you've built for yourself over the years." Me: Today's is "Dildo in a panini press." Lex: (something sappy that is irrelevant to the joke) Lex: also just what would putting a dildo in a panini press do to the thing? Me: Depends on the dildo. Food safe silicon: not much. Any other plastic: flat dildo. Me: grilled dildo. A grildo, if you will. Me: If you wildo Will: Will willdo (a pun he makes constantly). Willdid do last night, actually.
Here´s a riddle for german speakers: An especially pouty purse full of meat, related to ravioli. Spoiler Maultasche, overly literally translated a moanbag
one of my friends graced us with a beautiful one just now in a discord chat: Friend 1: i spent today huffing glue accidnetally Friend 2: at least it's not a gateway drug Spoiler when you start with glue you tend to stick to it
Spoiler: Otherkin joke Autumn, as befitting of the season in which Halloween takes place, marks an increase in people who are kin with stranger things, such as liquid relocation devices, or pumpkin.
that reminds me: i saw a thing where all the portal characters were dogs wheatley was a pomerainian because he's british aka a pom
Why are heavy artillery operating dwarves shaped like pigs? Spoiler Because they're cannon dwarves Spoiler cannon dorfs Spoiler Ganondorf
Me, to boyfriend: So you want to see a dermatologist, an ophthalmologist, and a gastroenterologist. Any other -gists? Me, some seconds later: Oh, hell, I should have said "Is that the gist of it?"
Oh, oh, I just came up with the perfect name for a wordplay-based-combat type melee character, based on greek mythology -- Punthesilea. On an unrelated note, I've asked myself whether masks are more of a guy thing or a girl thing. After all, they're pretty maskuline. ETA: I have been informed my tendency to wordplay with wild apundon is a bit punful to read at times, and I wish to apologize for that. I but strive to become the epuntome of interlexical wit. Which is a bit of a mouthful, although 'punography' sounds a bit awkward.
I am working on a project about the conservation and cleaning of feathers. Unfortunately, I am stumped for a punny title. "Birds of a feather" doesnt really work, but I'm stuck on it and can't come up with anything else.
Ferrets have an excellent sense of direction because they contain lots of iron, making them magnetic. Spoiler: Does this count as a stealth pun? They're ferrous.
mum: *gives the dog a nut* me: *watches the amusing facial contortions the dog does to chew the nut* mum: a nutty dog! (the dog has picked up a taste for nuts as a treat after eating some that the parrot threw on the ground.)