Especially since people with chronic illnesses are often of lower income, what with, you know, not being able to work and having to pay necessary medical bills before they can think about large hard-to-transport expensive-to-maintain luxuries like scooters.
For people who don't need them all of the time? Not really. My last good contact was over a decade ago, when the commercials were making it out like a company was handing them out like candy. Uncle mentioned that the rental was a pretty penny because Auntie's was broken, but I've been staying with my mom who kept ignoring how the water-system was sounding less like a barking dog and more like a tortured animal as time went by, until there wasn't enough water to do her laundry even though she just got a new washer and the dryer broke... it's normal to just pretend a problem just doesn't exist until you can't ignore it. Also in my last city, they were everywhere and we weren't where the well-off lived. Not chronic? Oh, just every time they go to the grocery store... Hmm. You know what? {\s Everyone can use them, even college jocks that just want to joyride. /s} In reality, there probably should be better rules in stores that have problems, but that requires more research. I'm willing to accept that both of us are out of that depth for doing more than forming opinions, unless you have a compelling authority on the matter. Your mother probably drew less scorn because if she looked able-bodied, she probably wouldn't have taken the scooter if she didn't have a "genuine" need. You know what? I'm just going to just dismiss that there is such a thing as a fat-person that acts entitled. It was all just some fatphobia conspiracy. This is one thing where I think we could agree with. They're doctors, they should be examining patients outside of just looking at them. They do have access to the medical history. They can order bloodwork if it wasn't done recently. They should be confirming that their patient isn't a unicorn in a herd of zebras, or whatever the term is.
I look to this thread now and then hoping something positive is within it at last, and every time there's an inch of progress it rolls backwards and down the escalator at top speed and into a mud puddle all over again. I will learn someday, but that day is not today apparently.
I just want to highlight this because I think it’s really, really good advice, Greallan. This type of corrective self talk will help you unlearn a lot of toxic, racist shit. ETA: man I fucked up the formatting on this. Kathy said the stuff in the quote box.
For that matter: "From now on I'm going to pretend there's no such thing as a black person who steals things." Do you see what's wrong with that?
Either answer my list of questions as requested or I am *done*, because I have been trying exceptionally hard to be open minded and kind to you and your latest replies spit in the face of all the effort I have put in. You are being cruel and spiteful and insulting about many things.
...you do realize there is such a thing as a middle ground, right? You realize there are people who can generally get around short distances just fine with breaks in between, but that things like walking around a grocery store or mall or other extended shopping trip can exhuast or cause them unmanageable pain, right? This is another thing you do a lot, it's called splitting or black and white thinking. Someone challenges your assumption and you immediately jump to an all or nothing conclusion. "If I am wrong about this part, that must mean that the entirety of the thing must be wrong!!!" I still can't tell if you're doing it to be contrary and hostile or if you're really falling into black and white thought patterns though. If the former, and you're just being sarcastic to be a dick, I would suggest trying to stop that and approach conversations in good faith. If the latter then that's a data point that may help change/tailor how we can approach interactions with you so we can talk with less conflict? Some clarification/insight would be appreciated.
an anecdote because i hate what greallen is saying very fucking much: i dont like to say im like? Disabled bc i dont feel like that term belongs to me, but there are times where getting around, especially in extended trips such as shopping, are painful to the point where going without some form of mobility aid wouldnt be feasible or safe. my roommates are relatively abled. when they go grocery shopping, they can take hours. sometimes lineups take forever. i am physically incapable of standing for extended periods of time most days, especially if i've just spent the few hours before that on my feet. i often dont take my cane with me because i worry about getting weird looks for being fat and needing a mobility aid. my issue is entirely invisible. there are days where i KNOW my roommates aren't taking my pain seriously, let alone the general public when some days i have a cane and others i dont. i can only fucking imagine how bad it has to be for someone who may need to use a public wheelchair/scooter. disabilities can be invisible. that imaginary college student could be suffering just as much as any of the strawman or random imaginary people you've made up to justify your prejudices in the last half a fucking year you've been here. stop making up excuses to think ill of other people for being fat, for fucks' sake.
So, have you ever actually seen that happen? Because I've never seen anything even like that. And you're using pretty dismissive language, here; "scooty-puffs" is not a term someone uses for an actually medically necessary tool. And it's worth noting that "get your own" isn't even a tiny bit like a solution to the problem, because scooters are a horrible pain to move to and from a store, and very expensive, and rarely covered by insurance, and... what if we just kept them in the stores and tried to make sure they were available? On every topic, you seem to go straight for "what if I just assume, with no basis or evidence of any kind, that other people deserve derision and mockery, and I should be the one to provide it". Knock it off, it's an awful look. Is it conceptually possible that some people are using scooters who don't have a real medical reason to? Probably. Do I care? Not even a little. Because what I see is that people who actually benefit significantly from them have them available most of the time in a lot of stores, and this means that actual people who would otherwise be in extreme pain are not in pain. That's good! That's wonderful! And if a few people ride scooters around for laughs as a result... okay? Fine. That's way better than having people be in a lot of pain.
you see, greallan, people like you are the reason i purposefully dont use my mobility aids like my cane and instead "deal with" the immense amounts of pain and am often bedridden for hours or even a day after an hour long shopping trip. because im afraid ppl will think im just a fat lazy bitch instead of someone with inherent genetics that fuck up my knees in a way completely unrelated to my weight :U
Because people are ascribing opinions on me that I don't hold. Or once they realize what opinion I hold, they reverse the argument. Why is what I say any of your business? I go with the middle ground, which is why I generally don't confront individuals. If too many people say that they have conditions, you gotta know that some of them are just making excuses but you can't tell which ones. You just have to remember that it's possible and carry on. I try to convince people of a middle ground, and they keep attacking me over it, so I jump to their all-or-nothing thinking and then get yelled at for that.
Sorry, it got flooded out. I was going to respond and then too many more messages came in while I was typing a different response. - I believe overweight people are inherently sinful Not really. - I believe the majority of overweight people are just making excuses and could slim down if they really wanted too Probably not. There are people who are already trying and haven't lost weight yet. There are people want to but don't know how. There are people who need to do mental work before they can be successful. There are some people whose body just won't cooperate when they do everything right. There are some people who don't want to, honestly happy or don't want to put in the effort (it is hard, especially with underlying issues,) which isn't the type of excuse I'm talking about. There are some people that just didn't pay attention until they got too heavy to move and there's little to be done. For some of these categories, I wish that there was more help available. - I believe the best way to make people realize they need to lose weight is by mocking them No. The people who need to lose weight already know it. If they complain about being unhappy with their diet or don't know how to approach it, I could give them some search terms to read. - I do not believe that most people who cite a medical condition as the reason for their weight are telling the truth Most? Many? Mostly just people who go on to convince other people not to lose weight. - I do not understand why anyone would want to feel positive about their fat body Maybe I don't fully understand, but people do want to feel positive about being fat. Isn't acknowledging that enough? - I believe fat people waste space that could be occupied by people who need it more and are choosing to be selfish Only in cases of airplane-seat spillover. That issue is a bit thorny. And with that done here's a list of things I'd like to have replied too the same way based off things said in this thread: - I am open to changing my toxic mindset Yes, in cases where I actually have that mindset. - I am willing to read scientific sources and articles shared about the things I would like to talk about, even if they provide facts that go against my held beliefs Of course. I actually agreed with most of the last article, the one that started out with the scurby. - I am willing to commit to treating the members of the forum with respect and dignity, without insulting them or putting words in their mouths I'll ask for the same. The best way for me to learn is by example, so try to treat me like you(population) want to be treated. - I am willing to apologize for the harm I have caused people due to my communication issues, and in learning how to apologize in a way that does not cause more harm Yes, and I'll need a hand with that. [/QUOTE]
There's nothing wrong with a fat person using a cane. Next time I get the chance, I'll try actually looking around when I'm using mine and see how many looks there are. Alright, as long as they're not keeping someone who needs it from using the scooter, people can ride them around for jollies. Maybe if there are stores that have those sort of problems with not enough should just get more.
I gotta say, having a person who is obviously both delusional and going out of their way to be a shithead talk like that is making me feel a lot better about my weight.
NVM about the cane, I have SIL's story about the looks she got when she was pushing granny's walker. Should I doubt her story because I didn't see it? Should I doubt when someone says a fat-person yelled at them for not needing the store scooter when she had an injury?
you misunderstand i said what i said because of what YOU commented. not from what anyone else said or the actions of anyone else. my reaction of regret and sadness was from YOUR words. because briefly i started to think you were getting it and making headway and then immediately it turned around and disappeared again and was even further back than before and i was upset with myself for being hopeful that something stuck.
Emphasis mine because here's the rub. One the most common purely physical issues that make weightloss hard to impossible and weightgain very easy is PCOS. It's considered underdiagnosed to hell and back, as evidenced by this study, which put up an incident rate of 18%, 70% of which were not diagnosed prior to the study's screening. Other studies vary in their incidence, ranging from 8% all the way up to 25% so I think we can accept the 18% of as a good mean. That means that whether or not they have a diagnosis, almost a fifth of everyone available with ovaries has PCOS. It's incredibly fucking common and it's KNOWN to both up the risk of lipid mteabolism disorders and diabetes type II. And as mentioned it has an incredibly high number of people who have it, but are not diagnosed with having it. That means that again, you have no fucking business saying whether or not someone's lying because chances are, they absolutely aren't, and you're just being bad at medicine. Again.
